Today, I went to a restaurant with my boyfriend. When it came time for us to leave, I saw him write something on the receipt for our waitress. I managed to get a quick look; it was his number. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my boyfriend and I had a lovely dinner date. Our waitress was really sweet, so we talked about leaving her a big tip. When we got home, we discovered we both thought the other person had left it. FML
Today, I took a friend out for what I thought was date. After dinner was over and I paid, she pulled the bill out and wrote her name phone number on it for the waiter. FML
Today, I took my girlfriend out to eat at a diner where my friend works. My friend was our waiter but too busy to talk much. He texted me after we'd left to tell me that my girlfriend had slipped him her number. FML
Nice try
Today, while I was leaving a restaurant, the very handsome waiter, whom I had been trying to hit on all night, said to me, in front of everyone, "Why did you write your phone number on the table with hearts around it? You know I won't call you." FML
First step
Today, I went out with a friend to grab some food and we were served by this really cute and fun waiter. Stepping out of my comfort zone and deciding to do something crazy, I left my phone number on the bill. I got home only to realize that I forgot to pay the bill. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went to a restaurant so I could apply for a job, and we decided to eat there. After we finished, I went to start the car. When we got home, I asked him how much the bill came to. Apparently he didn't pay. I had already given them my completed application. FML
Denied
Today, I asked a girl for her number and I wrote it down when she gave it to me. When I called her, it wasn't her. She'd given me a restaurant's phone number. FML
Today, my boyfriend was seated in my section at work. As he sees me his face drops... he's on a date. He had forgotten I work there. I had to serve him and his date, and they didn't leave a tip. FML
Today, while working as a waitress, an attractive woman sat at one of my tables. When she paid, I decided to be bold and write my number and "Call me" on her receipt. She put in a complaint to my manager. FML
Today, I was at lunch with my girlfriend. The waitress came up and asked for her number, then asked if she had a significant other. I laughed as my girlfriend gave the waitress her number. They're going on a date, tonight. FML
Top comments
Zman23 3
Well, I would be looking for a new boyfriend.
yankfan89 27
I think there is a typo in that FML it should say ex-boyfriend
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Comments (173)
Zman23 3
Well, I would be looking for a new boyfriend.
lindora 35
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I think YDI because only an idiot would continue a relationship with someone who's cheating.
Razzle_Dazzle_5 11
56 That might have been the first time he ever cheated. I can't possibly see how she would deserve it.
THE_A_TEEN 28
How the hell did you come up with that, #56? Where does it say that OP knows that her boyfriend is cheating on her? Only an idiot would come up with that assumption.
ProfessionalTrol_fml 14
I swear... Not cheating in a relationship is like some valuable skill nowadays
TheElderTROLLZ 15
88 - It's a dying ancient art...
ShyAnn29 15
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
So, writing down your phone number is now considered cheating? Yeah, it was not right of him to do, but to call it cheating, is a bit ridiculous!
mad_hatter0666 22
It's not the act of writing it down, but the intention behind it. Why would he give the waitress his number? And if he wanted to try to make it seem harmless, why didn't he just let his girlfriend know what he was doing instead of letting her mind wander to the first place it did? Just seems shady in my opinion.
ShyAnn29 15
138 you are right and I agree, I guess I was just speaking in general. I don't know why I got thumbed down -_-
downtime 13
138, Yes, it's shady. Not cheating until one of them forms some kind of bond. Doing something bad isn't a free pass for everyone to label it as whatever they please - so the comment you're responding to is actually correct. He isn't cheating. Yet.
kyarush 10
Got a free meal, quit bitchin.
THE_A_TEEN 28
He wants to **** a waitress. Rear the FML better.
kprando25 8
155- Free meal? Where the heck did you get that? Read the FML more carefully and you will read the words 'he wrote something on the RECEIPT'.
doglover100 29
I would've crossed out the number and put the number of some random person. Then dump him.
thisiscat 14
Who else but Quagmire?
guitarbeast 22
Who else but shirt pants
shinshoku13 19
What?^
twinny_sc 13
14 is referencing the episode of family guy where the guys lost their memories, and quagmire named himself "shirt pants."
whattheforkdude 0
Giggity giggity.
OffToTheGayBar 9
FOR THE SEXUAL THRILL, THE SEXUAL THRILL!
BillyDuhKid 0
Respect for wear the Hijab and postin a pic on fml btw. Most Muslims wouldnt do that.
The_Hitdude 12
95- I tip my hat to you sir. This ida the first time I haven't seen someone ask Noor if she is a nun. I hope this is a sign of good things to come.
KiddNYC1O 22
Oh, Quagmire quotes... Let's see... So, which one of you wants to lose their virginity?
thisiscat 14
"How old are you?" "16" "18? GIGGITY GIGGITY GOOO" -Quagmire
richy90255 8
Quagmire quote: Cheers to the drunken clam were they don't ask for id's and bother do I Giggity
KiddNYC1O 22
"And when he woke up the next morning she was still in his bed!!" "Ahh!" ....
thisiscat 14
"Hey Meg, 18 yet?" -Quagmire
aaahhhfire21 0
Quagmire-hello 9-1-1.....yah its stuck in a window this time.
RogueWarrior869 23
I love how this line of comment replies has turned into Quagmire quotes.XD Keep up the awesome, guys!
bfsd42 20
Did you think the date went well? I'm guessing he didn't.
queen_awks 16
I'd say it went well for him too- he met a cute waitress!
missamerica95 0
I would venture to say that she should think it went well too, she found out why she should have an EX-boyfriend!
johnmleech 7
He's a keeper
micahsmommy 13
Or not...Yea I think I'm going to go with not.
iloveryan052710 8
He was being sarcastic stupid people.
micahsmommy 13
52- yes we know. This has been one of the most over used sarcastic comments on FML.
Pentium_4 27
VERY overused. but 4 is new to FML, so we'll let it slide....once
Justforlolz 14
73- naaaaa, you don't let the n00bs slide that easily. We need to beat the rules into their head. See my profile for a sure-fire FML survival guide.
Razzle_Dazzle_5 11
86 Can I get a hardcover copy of that?
tylersign 11
He just wants to leave feedback, like some of the receipts ask.. But on the sex.
yankfan89 27
I think there is a typo in that FML it should say ex-boyfriend
ReesieBanana21 12
Totally. U deserve WAY betta. I am having boy troubles as well. I feel ya, bra!
hapetreefriend 1
Gimmie ur number we'll get back at him! ;)
perdix 31
Can you blame a guy for trying to organize a threesome?
tylersign 11
Yup.
siickman 7
Perdix ... First time i see thumbs down on your comment...
perdix 31
Naw, it happens a lot. Especially when I advocate threesomes. I have a hard enough time organizing a twosome -- I'm surprised anyone thinks I know shit about threesomes.
tylersign 11
I was actually thinking of saying something about a threesome. Thanks for being the guinea pig, Perdix.
hapetreefriend 1
Gimmie ur # we'll get back at him ;)
BroeCell 2
You sure it is your boyfriend or not some random guy you met on the internet ? ;-)
siickman 7
The stupidity of this comment is massive its making me feel stupid
SkoomaKi 28
11 - I don't even...