Today, I went on a first date with my crush. Turns out we only have one thing in common: we would both bang Hillary Clinton. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my crush from high school finally agreed to go out with me. While on the seemingly good date, she offered me a discount to her OnlyFans page. FML
Today I went on a date with my long time crush only to find out that we are distant cousins. FML
Today, I started dating my crush. Turns out she's a living nightmare. FML
Today, I went out for coffee with my sister and my crush. I spent the majority of the date flirting with my crush, and when he dropped us off at home, I told him I had fun on our date. He looked at me surprised and said he'd thought I'd tagged along on his date with my sister. FML
Today, I was on my first date with my crush. When I saw her, I greeted her with, "Hey, sweetheart." She's convinced I said, "Hey, retard." FML
Today, after having an amazing first date with my long time crush, we ended up going out to dinner. We shared a meal, and it was delicious! This would have been the ultimate dream come true... Except for the part about me throwing up in his car on the way back home. FML
Today, I went on a date with a beautiful woman I had recently met. Great food, great conversation, and a great connection. That is, until she revealed that she is a lesbian. FML
Today, I went out for dinner with my crush and expressed my love for her. She responded by saying that we should know that this is the real thing, and to do so we needed to date other people and let time bring us together. FML
Today, I had lunch with an old friend I've had a crush on for years. We're both single, so I figured it to be kind of like a date. Until he started talking about how he told his brother last night that we would never be a thing. FML
Today, I finally went on a date with my crush. When he kissed me goodnight, it made me think of a dying slug. FML
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Top comments
bheaze 20
Then there's only one thing to do... Threesome with Hillary Clinton.
ThunderLightTSV 31
Of course this was posted where I live, why am I not surprised.
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Comments (70)
bheaze 20
Then there's only one thing to do... Threesome with Hillary Clinton.
Tripartita 45
That could also be considered two things.
vikky538 29
Bill Approves it
freddygasman 18
Invite Bill and have an orgy, you know he'd be down.
commanderinkush 3
Hey and while we're at it go ahead and invite Monica too
ThunderLightTSV 31
Of course this was posted where I live, why am I not surprised.
gabimk23 13
chillary clinton
Benpie 22
Kentucky is why you aren't surprised
badassmf1234 22
How did that come up?
MysticAmmu 17
Maybe they were playing a game of f*ck, marry, kill. I don't know how else that would come up.
dtut 15
ew
imbedderdenu 23
damnit! I meant to thumbs up! I agree...ewwwwwwww
pixierara 28
How does that even come up in a conversation
MisterEx 28
"Haha, you're hilarious! Which reminds me! I'd bang Hilary".
ssnow_fml 20
I'd be more ashamed that I would bang her. She is not even remotely cute at all.
Kitouran 30
That's your opinion, but everyone's allowed to have their choice in whatever they want without feeling like they're being chastised as long as the receiving end is of age.
laden_swallow09 35
That's right, 23, and the rest of us are allowed to have an opinion on it, regardless of whether or not it's supportive. Clinton is a nasty piece in more ways than one, and I can only imagine she'd be even nastier in the bedroom… and not in the good way.
xxkrystalxx 14
Shes not cute but shes also a murderous, lying thieving piece of shit with an unbelievable god-complex.
xx000o 27
It's sad but it seems that you Americans are about to get butt banged by Hillary for at least the next four years.
TonierShadow 19
I banged Hillary Clinton once... Now it Berns down there.
sallysali9 17
Guess you need to Cruz to the sexual health clinic !
potatocharmander 17
But you don't have Obama care?
Burton_Forever 23
Y'all should just go ahead and cut to having kids and marriage don't worry about getting to know one another... Hell you won't find anyone else that would do that nasty deed.. Not even Bill wants to!
NostalgiaFreak9 43
What the ****?
CMSobi 6
"Bang her" as in short her?