Today, I was the only girl in my lab class. The instructor was learning our names. When he came to me, I went to say "mine will be easy" and it came out as "I'm easy." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was teaching a class when a student pointed out that I'd used the wrong "your/you're" while writing on the board. FML
Today, my professor was doing roll-call. As usual, she didn't say my name because it's so close to the person before me. So to differentiate, she decided she would call the girl before me "the pretty one". FML
Today, I accidentally called my teacher "Babe." FML
Today, it was the last day of school, and I said goodbye to one of my students. She then told me how to correctly pronounce her name. I'd said it wrong all year. FML
Today, I realized how invisible I am when our professor was showing us that he knows the names of all the students in our class. When he reached me, he just smiled at me and skipped to the person next to me. I took 3 courses with this guy yet I'm the only one he didn't know the name of. FML
Today, I was hitting on a girl who was getting ready to walk into the same class as me. We were waiting outside the room, so I told her that I'd heard the professor for the course was a total bitch. We walked into the room. I sat down at a desk. She stood behind the podium. FML
Today, I discovered the guy that sits next to me in class is actually a girl. Not only is that bad, but we had to write a paper about each other. I used the words "him" and "he", and read it to the whole class. FML
Today, I was the only girl in gym class who couldn't lift the weight, and the only one to fart multiple times during the attempt. FML
Today, as two of my students walked into my classroom, I said, "Hi, ladies". One of them screamed at me: "Did you just assume my gender?!" FML
Today, I was flirting with this guy that had been forced to be my lab partner for class. He was really funny and attractive, too. In the middle of our conversation he said "You're so cute! You remind me of my boyfriend!" FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Ragna_fml 0
Your life must be in ruins.
HahAboy95 0
what'd the teacher say
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (134)
unpossible 26
This FML, to me, seemed like a perfect opportunity for OP to use sluttysue or putsoutpatricia for a user name. I was quite disappointed by 'anonymous'.
FernandoTorres_fml 0
The truth never hurt anyone. Don't worry.
gfmodella24 0
that same thing would have happened to me haha
perdix 31
You didn't have to say it. The Rules for Guys clearly state that if there is only one girl in the room (and she must rate from below average or better) then all of the guys must compete for her attention and the one who scores with her first is the Winner. Your advertisement was gratuitous and unnecessary, but your quarter/semester should be a lot of fun;)
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
I can do 100 pushups in 20 minutes! I drive a Dodge Stratus!
CallMeHush 1
I'll see your pushups and raise you a custom Navigator and a Jeep.
perdix 31
I can lick the tip of my nose.
Sirin_fml 47
So you think that's impressive? I can lick Perdix' nose. Without throwing up.
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
@#$%! I lost this contest. If anyone needs me, I'll be changing the oil in my Stratus* *Does not actually own Stratus or oil
SSJ5Goku 0
... I can do 50 pushups on my knuckles in a minute, and 100 crunches in 2 o.o
Sirin_fml 47
I can do 250 pushups while driving a jeep while licking Perdix' nose while banning trolls while sardonically laughing at their tormented wails... ... In reality, I can do the first, fourth, and fifth simultaneously.
perdix 31
I can drink an entire sea and hold it in my mouth, I have an iron neck, I'm fireproof, I can stretch my legs for hundreds of feet and I can hold my breath for days. Take that, bitches! DISCLAIMER: Sirin's claim is merely theoretical at this time. Rigorous lab testing to see whether she can provide a robust nose-licking to me while keeping her lunch are being planned. Results will be posted as soon as practicable.
Sirin_fml 47
Pft, lab testing is a bit unnecessary, Perdix, you faithless fu-- AAHBBBLLLAAAARRGGHHHHH!!! I was wrong! I was so very wrong! I made untested claims and shamed the Staff! This is worse than the morning-after effects of a chipotle binge! And yet I regret nothing -_-
perdix 31
Oh, I was looking forward to the tests :( I guess my enthusiasm for the work might have produced some results of questionable validity. And my requests for associated licking experiments may have been unwelcome.
ScaryyMary 14
Perdix, did you just rip off a kids' story with drinking the sea and the iron neck and all that?
Sirin_fml 47
Then we sue for copyright infringement.
perdix 31
OK, you got me! That was from "The Five Chinese Brothers!" Busted. In reality, though, I own three homes, one made of brick and the other two are made of sustainable, green biomass materials. If the girl has a dog, it's probably OK. I love dogs, except those with breathing problems.
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
(enters gracefully) Forgot my keys (reads Perdix's last reply) Your reality sounds believable to me. Moving on... (leaves frantically)
WeStayCrunk24x7 0
i can lick perdix's nose and feet at the same time.........
kallielou 10
Haha Perdix i can too :P PEOPLE WITH USELESS TALENTS FTW!! :D
kallielou 10
I meant the whole, Touch my nose with my tongue BTW :P i didnt realize there were so many other comments to perdix >.<
Twi_lover_EC 6
Why is half the comments about rape??????
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
because it's easy.
CallMeHush 1
Leave the internet for a little while and I fall this far behind depressing. Too bad you couldn't lick p's nose though, if you could lick that you can lick anything ;p
eh_wats_up 0
lolz
liger 0
Always think before you talk
Tonic_Chord 0
Freudian slip perhaps?
bigboy93 0
SirMixalot88 0
well, are you easy? if so please email me if your butt is round
jandrews10 0
...and if you want a XXX throwdown, dial 1-900-Mix-Alot and kick them nasty thoughts.
hennessey 0
That was awesome. =)