Today, I was telling my dad about how I emasculated my guy friends because I can drive a stick shift while they can't. He said, "And you wonder why people think you're a lesbian." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my mom tried to convince my dad that I was a lesbian. Why? Because she was bored. FML
Today, my dad has “accepted” that I’m a lesbian, but can’t seem to understand why I can’t just ignore that part of myself, marry a man and have kids, and never talk about the "lesbian thing" ever again. FML
Today, I admitted to my wife that I'd really like to get a Prius, but I was worried that if I did, everyone would question my sexuality. She told me, "I don't know why you care, everyone already thinks you're gay." FML
Today, I found out that my parents have thought I'm lesbian for at least a year. I now understand why my dad has been trying to get me to "hang out" with his co-worker's daughter. FML
Today, I came out of the closet. Now whenever I'm getting ready to go somewhere with my dad he says, "Lesgo, lesbo." FML
Today, I introduced my new boyfriend to my parents. Everyone knows he's into the emo scene, but this didn't stop my dad from slowly looking him up and down, then saying, completely deadpan, "You never told us you were a lesbian, honey." FML
Today, I found out that my mother has been telling everybody that I’m a lesbian, because both of her best friends have at least one gay child each, and she was feeling left out. This explains why people have been treating me differently the last few weeks. FML
Today, one of my dad's work friends came over. As he was leaving, he complimented my dad on having three "strapping young boys." I informed him that I'm a girl, and I have a hormone imbalance that causes me to have a lot of hair and a deep voice. I guess my dress didn't give him a clue. FML
Today, my entire family thinks I'm a lesbian. I'm straight. I'm embarrassed and don't know how to tell them that I've been single for so long because I can't get a guy. FML
Today, I went for a drive with my boyfriend and his dad. His dad was kind enough to point out at every opportunity girls "that would be better for him than me." FML
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Top comments
eftup 9
Women that can drive a stick is a plus. Was that dirty?
lulu121893 0
I didn't know driving a stick would considered being lesbian...?
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Comments (117)
sourgirl101 29
Zebidee, you are correct. My very first car was manual. I can now drive anything. I'm just waiting for that Ferrari.(:
SeasonedLemur 5
In England automatic cars are reserved especially for the elderly and ******* idiots. if you can only drive an automatic you should only be given a Go-kart license.
TurboLCR 0
you speak the truth good sir !
m1ssophiebee 0
i drive stick, seriously what is wrong with girls driving stick?
ydi_4_suking 20
well a lot of Ferraris and most of the newer cars are automatic. they just have that thing you put to the side and push up or down and thats supposed to be manual no clutch or anything
emodude44 0
I fail to see how driving better then someone who thinks with his penis constitutes as making you a lesbian
nerdsgetmehot 23
Your dad's logic is redonkulous. Driving a stick shift and showing your guy friends that you have "skills" that they don't (stick shift isn't that bad, really) doesn't make you a lesbian.
MrBobby_fml 7
gotta lol @ america... yeh changing gears is really no effort... deary me.
nerdsgetmehot 23
#90 Not all Americans think that driving a stick shift is difficult.
RedMiniStapler 1
I got my driver's license with auto. when I moved to europe I had to learn how to drive manual for european driver's license. now I drive a manual car and I hate it.
Aoifexzx 3
I live in Ireland and people drive automatics ... everyone just learns how to drive stick first
zebraface 15
you had that coming