Today, I was sitting next to the guy I am trying to get close to while we were at the bar. Music was playing, so I thought that while his attention was diverted I would sneak out a yawn. Just as I did so, the music went silent and I let out a tremendous burp. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to a new bar with friends. After arriving I became extremely gassy, so I planned a smooth release during the loud music. Little did I know, the bar occasionally dips its music to hear the guests singing. When the music turned off, all eyes turned to me. FML
Today, I burped in front of my crush. Well, not really in front of him. I turned around mid-burp and noticed him, not knowing anyone was there. The surprise made me scream a little, which only amplified the burp. So I made this mighty belch-turned-scream noise, while maintaining eye contact with him. FML
Today, I woke myself up by farting in my sleep, only to realize that the guy I'd brought home from the bar was still next to me. He was awake. FML
Today, I was sitting in a secluded corner of a coffee shop and felt extremely gassy. Thinking I'd be safe, I let out a pretty nasty smelling fart. Next thing I know, a cute guy is approaching me and asked my name, but all it took was for him to inhale once and he bolted. FML
Today, I noticed a guy checking out my ass in the mirror behind the bar where I work. He was cute, so I thought I'd put on a little show. I bent over to reach for something near the floor, which caused me to let rip a series of uncontrollable farts, like popping bubble wrap. He quickly left. FML
Today, I was at the library studying. There was a really cute guy across the room. I decided to play it cool and walk his way and grab some water. Right as I walked by, my body decided to let out the loudest fart. He laughed. I kept walking and asked my friend to grab my books. FML
Today, I fell asleep at a party. I farted so loud that I woke myself up. Everyone heard. FML
Today, I farted so loud that I woke myself up. And the stranger sitting next to me on the airplane. FML
Today, while waiting for class, I let out a huge fart in front of everyone thinking no one would hear it over the music. I was wearing headphones. FML
Today, I went to an orchestra concert. Halfway through the performance I had to fart really bad, so I decided to try and sneak it in while the orchestra was playing a loud exciting part. Just as I let it rip, there was a dramatic pause in the music. Everyone heard. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
mopar383 0
I'm a country boy and if anyone passes anything we never think twice about it. As a matter a fact we find it as a turn on when ours gals aren't afraid of something natural
ceceisgay 0
if burping is your biggest problem, i envy you. why didnt you just laugh it off, guys burp too. im sure he woulda understood.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (36)
KarmaLanding 0
The part I like is she was trying to "sneak out a yawn"... Holy ******* crap. Just yawn, for gods' sakes, you shallow, self-absorbed twank.
theluckygirl28 8
This reminded me of a song by Eminem... Just Lose It. That being said, it's sad that you were mortified when you burped.... but seriously, get over yourself. It's not the end of the world.
BMTHxMedusa 0
how is that a bad thing i'm a girl and I think it's pretty frign awesome
universal99 0
this is so not a big deal. believe me. guys like it when a girl is comfortabke enough with herself to let out a burp every once in awhile. youre overreacting
tohaveandtohold 0
perfect timing lol fyl
substitutes 0
What are the odds
Wolfipoo 31
Drop the bass?