Today, I woke up and saw a piece of black fuzz on my shirt. I tried to pick it off but it crawled into my hand and stabbed my skin with its sharp legs. I screamed like a little girl because I had a centipede on me. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I washed my hands and reached for the towel but felt something sticky. It was a house centipede. It exploded. FML
Today, I was quietly having a bath when I felt something fall onto my shoulder blade. I glanced over my shoulder and saw what I thought were huge black spider legs. I screamed, completely hysterical, and I threw myself violently against a wall. It was my hair. FML
Today, I saw a spider crawling on the floor but had nothing to kill it with and it hid somewhere. So, I got dressed and went out and come home for a shower, and as I'm taking off my undies, something crushed and black fell out. It was the spider and he had been in my underwear the entire day. FML
Today, I woke up and found a small leg of what used to belong to a spider on the corner of my mouth. FML
Today, I was cleaning a pocketknife when I noticed a spider on my leg. My first reaction was to stab it. FML
Today, I noticed a small bite on my arm. I couldn't figure out what it came from until I saw a small insect crawling out of my bra. FML
Today, I woke up to the feeling of something crawling up my leg. I threw back the bed sheets and saw it was a cockroach. My dad said my ensuing scream was so girlish that he wondered what the hell my sister was doing in my bedroom. FML
Today, I was with my kids. We saw a tiny little bug and they started freaking out. Trying to show them that bugs are not scary, I picked it up. It bit me and now I have to go to the doctor because my hand is the size of a balloon. FML
Today, while I was working from home on my laptop and had my feet up on the coffee table, I felt something on my foot. I looked down to see a spider the size of a quarter on top of my bare foot. It started doing something so I froze, hoping it wouldn't bite me. Instead, it anchored the start of its web to my skin. FML
Today, I flipped out when I saw a centipede. I screamed, very loudly and in a very high-pitched voice. My girlfriend came into the room, stomped on it, picked it up and threw it in the trashcan. I apologized to her for the scene and all she said was, "I'm used to it." FML
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Top comments
Ksweety_fml 27
I would flipped out. I hate those things.
ajh1800 25
How do you confuse a centipede for black fuzz?!?!
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Comments (9)
BurnInDemonFire 39
I hope you ate it afterwards. It's wasteful if you don't.
Ksweety_fml 27
I would flipped out. I hate those things.
ajh1800 25
How do you confuse a centipede for black fuzz?!?!
onceuponatime456 16
Centipedes do not stab people because they do NOT have sharp legs!
A_Person 5
It crawled into your hand??? Did you go to get it removed?
donb23 23
Since you did not relay your age, its not that strange if you are 11.
SkullHQ 27
I would've done the same.
ike25 7
I live in hawaii and nothing is scarier than a centipede.
zuckerburg 21
You need to get your eyes tested if you can't tell "black fuzz" from a centipede...