Today, I was at the library studying. There was a really cute guy across the room. I decided to play it cool and walk his way and grab some water. Right as I walked by, my body decided to let out the loudest fart. He laughed. I kept walking and asked my friend to grab my books. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, while studying in the library, I felt a sudden urge to pass gas. There were not too many people around, so I let it go while in my seat and it went unnoticed. What caught the attention of everybody was the puddle slowly forming under my seat. Turns out, I farted so hard I pissed myself. FML
Today, I was sitting in a secluded corner of a coffee shop and felt extremely gassy. Thinking I'd be safe, I let out a pretty nasty smelling fart. Next thing I know, a cute guy is approaching me and asked my name, but all it took was for him to inhale once and he bolted. FML
Today, I decided to take a nap in the university library. I felt like I'd only closed my eyes for a minute, when a guy woke me up to tell me that I'd been farting in my sleep for the last half hour, and that the librarian was becoming concerned. FML
Today, I was sitting next to the guy I am trying to get close to while we were at the bar. Music was playing, so I thought that while his attention was diverted I would sneak out a yawn. Just as I did so, the music went silent and I let out a tremendous burp. FML
Today, I went to the library to study an upcoming exam. I sat in a quiet corner and was feeling focused. Suddenly, I sneezed so loudly that the entire library went silent. I could feel the stares of every student on me as I tried to pretend I didn’t just disrupt the entire study session. FML
Today, I was on a bench enjoying the sun, when a guy comes and sits next to me. Next thing I know, he lets out a loud fart, then looks my way with pride. I stare back in shock. He then says to me, "Yeah, that just happened," and walks off. FML
Today, I saw my crush at the grocery store. He saw me and started walking towards me. I got so excited that I farted when he came near. FML
Today I was walking around the mall and I saw my crush from high school. He came up to me and, instead of talking to him, I burped, and he just walked away. FML
Today, I was in a quiet library, trying to stifle a sneeze. In the process, I let out an embarrassingly loud and dramatic snort that echoed through the room. Heads turned. Many stared. FML
Today, in math class, I had the urge to fart. I had the bright idea that if I dropped my textbook and farted at the same time, nobody would hear it. I dropped my textbook, everyone looked at me, then I farted. Loudly. FML
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Top comments
alley_cat_118 0
Isn't that a good thing? I mean-- if you can make someone laugh, you can make them do anything, right? Funny women are a rarity, and you farting while looking sexy is hilarious.
cooterpunch 0
That's when you turn to him, a swoosh of hair covering one eye, and say "If you like that, there's more where it came from," turn on your heels and do a sexy saunter out of the library.
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Comments (35)
alley_cat_118 0
Isn't that a good thing? I mean-- if you can make someone laugh, you can make them do anything, right? Funny women are a rarity, and you farting while looking sexy is hilarious.
matt5217 4
maybe to you, but most guys don't like girls that do that
LegitDGK 0
fetish much?
Cashmere_Cactus 0
roflcopter.
president_benson 0
nice and cool does the trick ;-)
NorfolkDude 2
I would have laughed too and asked you out because that would be the funniest freaking thing ever. I couldn't wait to see what you did next, though. BTW, don't stress it that much. Passing gas is a regular thing it appears, and most people don't mind. It's "funny" but not if you're nasty about it.
quiksta 0
it's called a voluntary sphincter. you should have decided not to fart.
nobody_special 0
Sorry, I LOL'd irl. Well, at least he laughed instead of sneered at you... Good effort, though! :)
ridiculous_gnome 0
escaping fugitive farts happen... when you're doing push-ups, carrying bricks or sitting in a weird position... not when you're walking! Seek medical atention.
Dr_Phil 0
I'm having trouble understanding how it just slipped out.
ridiculous_gnome 0
maybe she was a little nervous and contracted her lips instead of her sphincter...
jaxspider 0
This only applies to good looking girls, farts just turn me on.