Today, I was sitting beside a very cute girl on a 3 hour bus trip with my class. She fell asleep, head on my lap. She woke up because my erection was jabbing her in the cheek. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, my crush fell asleep on me on the bus. This would have been fantastic if I didn't immediately have an erection in her ear. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the bus. When I woke up, my head was resting on the broad, tanned shoulder of the smoking hot guy sitting next to me. I had drooled a little. FML
Today, the guy sitting beside me on the bus fell asleep and just drooled on me. FML
Today, on the train, I was sitting next to a cute girl I didn't know. She fell asleep on my lap by accident and I just let her for the whole train ride. This is the closest I've ever been with a woman. FML
Today, while on the bus, an elderly man fell asleep on my shoulder. He looked sweet, so I didn't push him off. A few minutes later, the bus jolted and his head slipped down into my breasts. I'm pretty sure you don't smile like that when you're really asleep. FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML
Today, there were no more seats on the bus I was taking home, which meant I had to stand. I noticed that a creepy guy sitting in front of me had a boner, so I took a few steps back. Suddenly the bus went through something like a speed bump, which caused me to fall and sit on the man's lap. FML
Today, I was sitting on the bus when a good looking girl accidentally brushed her ass up against my shoulder as she walked past. This only made me realize that this has been the closest I've come to touching a girls ass in over a year. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the bus taking me home after a long hard day at work. I woke up with my head on a stranger’s shoulder, drooling. The worst part? The stranger was my crush from college, who I haven’t seen in years. Turns out we have the same bus route. FML
Today, I took the bus to work. A sweet old lady got on after and sat next to me. Halfway there, she fell asleep, her head on my shoulder. I gently tried to wake her up before my stop. She wasn't sleeping. I let a dead woman lie on me for 30 minutes. FML
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Top comments
gogokira 5
gross bro
mintcar 10
Wow...how'd you explain that one?
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Comments (584)
BIGbadBRIZZLE 0
plz tell me you unzipped
perdix 31
Why is you life ******? A faux ******** is better than no ******** at all.
Colin466 0
At least she knows that you're into her, and that your shit works!
malters 9
and now she has a feel for your size
ilyfrenchiee 0
LAWL LAWL LAWL! FYL mang!
colincastleberry 4
hey I agree with u and just wanted 2 say wow u are cute ;) message me
kykyshay 0
man *****. >:-|
mcintosh123 15
How can you tell you can't even see her face
chlobo13 0
318- that's just what I was about to say!! xD
justalilrandom2 4
286 is typing with his knob guys, c'mon!
kykyshay 0
I was talking about 286
chammi 0
agree. her body is nothing special. pasty, no chest, etc. I'd say she was selling herself on FML. Or her face is too ugly so she posts a bikini shot where the flash is covering her face. nice job. *****.
nomnom_muffins 0
335, although I agree she is a ****, I don't see why saying she is pasty or flat chested is necessary. some women can look great with flat chests, despite people like you giving us a hard time for being different from the status quo :/...
tomsgirl101207 0
we could be friends you and I. lol. I was having a similar thought. hahaha.
WOLFEYES72 2
335, comments like that are the reason wife beaters exist, just sayin'.
colincastleberry 4
I must say u all bring up good points I have been convinced yr all quite right my bad lol
mendozaale 0
hey boners are really hard to control
mcintosh123 15
Did you ask her if she liked it?
mendozaale 0
exactly some one with a plan ^
perdix 31
A faux ******** is better than no ******** at all.
vizkiz 12
Time to make a new submission to the urban dictionary, faux job. When a girl falls asleep with her head on a guy's lap and people see it wrong and think he was getting a ********, and the guy doesn't correct them.
vizkiz 12
Damn, looks like it's in there already.
varkey 7
WTF? Well she obviously liked you (at least before) if she put her head on your lap... but that's just creepy, man. FYL and YDI both...
Ringerace 0
Ask her why her cheek was on your boner?
berrychii17 5
win ^^
xoxoMEGANxoxo 13
hahahaha
Alicia17C 2
Hahahaha!!! win