Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML
Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs and the next seat. FML
Today, I was riding the bus home from school. I was sitting by myself, and my backpack was occupying the seat next to me. A hot girl boarded the bus, and was standing right where I was sitting. I placed my backpack on my lap, freeing up the seat. The girl stood the entire bus ride. FML
Today, I was sitting on the bus and as I'm quite short my legs were dangling. Some guy, who wasn't looking where he was going, tripped over my foot and went flying. He and everyone else on the bus glared at me like it was deliberate. The man next to me even changed seats in disgust. FML
Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs. FML
Today, while on the bus, I found out the seat I'd taken was the preferred spot of a very hostile and extremely overweight freshman. Instead of letting me find different place to sit, she half sat on me, and completely ignored my attempts to dislodge myself all the way to school. FML
Today, while on a crowded public bus, a cute girl asked if she could sit next to me. Problem is, I didn't hear correctly and thought she asked if anyone was sitting next to me. I answered no, causing her to walk off angrily and earning me several disgusted stares from other passengers. FML
Today, my friend and I offered a hot girl a lift home from campus. I was sitting in the passenger seat and she climbed in behind me. As I adjusted my seat forward to give her more leg room, my friend pulled off - slamming my seat back into her legs. FML
Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML
Today, while on the bus, I began to fall asleep. Suddenly, a man next to me started laughing very loudly, scaring me and jolting me out from my nap. I was so scared, I reflexively punched the girl in front of me in the face. I was pinned down by three other men while the cops were called. FML
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Top comments
allmidnighteyes 11
I don't think many people enjoy having random strangers' faces being randomly shoved into their crotch. You're probably not "revolting", she just thought you falling into her lap, all, "hay babay" was ******* creeptastic. But then again, there's the chance that you actually ARE revolting, you scaly man-fish. You ever drunk Bailey's from a shoe?
Emrysa 1
I know this is bitchy, but that would have been my reaction too. Public transportation, she doesn't know you, you could be trying to steal her wallet or something. Don't see to many people just randomly fall over on someone on the bus, learn to hold on to the bars. Sure you didn't do it "accidentally on purpose" creeper?
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Comments (63)
allmidnighteyes 11
I don't think many people enjoy having random strangers' faces being randomly shoved into their crotch. You're probably not "revolting", she just thought you falling into her lap, all, "hay babay" was ******* creeptastic. But then again, there's the chance that you actually ARE revolting, you scaly man-fish. You ever drunk Bailey's from a shoe?
lastichecked 0
It would seem Chris does.
Intellectualist 0
No, but I have gotten as close to baileys as I can without getting my nose wet :)
Peroxide 3
show us ya mangina chris...HAWT
allmidnighteyes 11
Hey hey hey, Peroxide... easyyy now, fuzzy little man peach.
mooncalf08 0
you wanna see my downstairs mix up?!
flying_vegan 0
Could you ever love me?
TattooedToDeath 0
its attached to your rod muther likah! easy now fuzzy man peach! seen them live :)
The_Pleb 0
Lol never heard of "scaly man fish before" +1
Ajjas013 6
Go Alan!!!
JessieMongoose 11
LOL man-fish. :3
day624 14
Lol im old greggg
Emrysa 1
I know this is bitchy, but that would have been my reaction too. Public transportation, she doesn't know you, you could be trying to steal her wallet or something. Don't see to many people just randomly fall over on someone on the bus, learn to hold on to the bars. Sure you didn't do it "accidentally on purpose" creeper?
_THE_MASTER_ 0
yah seriously. it was probably just enough of an abrupt stop for u 2 dive face-first into her snatch w/o it looking deliberate, but she saw right through you, you hideous ****** creeper. let that be a lesson to you. well, 2 lessons. 1 don' be a creeper, and 2, stop being ugly, and maybe some shit like that would fly with a cute girl. honestly, what's wrong with you? you didn't assume this would happen? seriously, though, keep a firm grip on those nifty bars they have to prevent you from ending up with your face on the sticky, smelly, shit covered, urine soaked, litter filled, disease carrying bus floor. and go see a doctor, you probably have herpes all over your face now, making you that much less appealing to women.
littlegolferboy 4
Maybe someone double-dared him to touch her boobs.
sobe23 0
Yeah, I agree. I hate when strangers touch me.
stupiddumbblonde 0
I agree with
Dabamash 0
Hahahaha, god, I love how your Username fits your comment.
DisposableHeroes 0
Racist!!
testing_fml 0
So you were standing in the aisle staring at this hottie, then you "accidentally" fell into her lap? Good news, you may not be revolting, but she definitely thinks you're a creep.
OverWind 0
YDI for being revolting.
Lisa89 3
lol, it's just her reacting. I'ld be a bit pissed off too if some stranger fell onto my lap on a grotty public bus, even if they were 'hot'
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
Speaking as a man in society, if Johnny Depp tripped and fell on my lap... um... excuse me for a second. (runs to the bathroom, smiling)
Deemon_Cat 0
Hahaha
amatayo 0
well being a guy if a chick fell into my lap ugly or not I'd be like "oh are you okay" but females are crazy so (shrug) I don't know what to say
Djoooiz 0
She didn't say you were revolting, that's what you've made of it..
freddie_fml 0
It's not always about you, honey. I'm sure most women would react that way to a stranger falling in their lap. Way to project your feelings about yourself onto a total stranger.
perdix 31
What are you revolting against? Public transportation? Personal hygiene standards? Laws that prevent men from laying on women anytime they want? Maybe I'll join your rebellion.
Gen_Knowledge 0
We should call Ché. He sure could give us some tipps.