Today, I was shaving off my beard for the first time in a very long time. I decided to have a little fun with it, and shaved my beard first into a goatee, then a handle-bar, then, finally, into a Hitler mustache. My electric razor dies. I don't have a normal one or an extra battery. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I shaved for the first time. My mum gave me a razor and I spent about 20 minutes trying to use it. I gave up, yelling, "FUCK IT!" and put it back on the shelf. It fell, and as it hit the floor, a lid fell off. I'd tried to shave with a sheathed razor for 20 minutes. FML
Today, my electric razor fell flat right after I had finished with my first cheek. And of course I don't have a manual one. FML
Today, my boyfriend, who hasn't shaved in a month, went to go shave. I was pretty excited since his beard was starting to make my face itch whenever we kissed. When he came out of the bathroom he had a handlebar mustache. FML
Today, I shaved off the beard I had been forced to grow over the past 3 weeks due to forgetting my razor when away. Fifteen minutes in, with half my beard gone, I realised I had got a tan everywhere but my beard. I now have a large white patch on my face. FML
Today, I realized I look better with a Hitler moustache than any other facial hairstyle. FML
Today, I shaved my legs. It's been so long since I've shaved that my razor broke. FML
Today, I tried a new beard trimmer that has a laser guide. I somehow set it too close to my skin and shaved a completely bald line straight through the middle of my beard. Now I look like a magician with a flesh mustache divider, or a bassist from a 90s nu-metal band. FML
Today, I woke up late for a job interview. I hadn't shaved in six days, but figuring I could do so en route, I grabbed my electric razor and ran for the bus. While shaving, the razor's battery died midway through, leaving me to attend the job interview with a Miami Vice scruff on half my face. FML
Today, I was shaving my underarms, when I heard a noise. I quickly turned my head to see what it was and got the razor caught in my hair. I'm now sporting a very attractive bald patch. FML
Today, to save money, I tried following a YouTube tutorial to trim my beard myself. Halfway through, the clippers slipped, and now I have a huge chunk missing in the middle of my chin. I tried to even it out, but it just got worse. Now I look like I lost a fight with a Flymo. FML
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Top comments
fatass123 0
That's the best FML in quite a while. I spit out my drink when I read this. Make sure you ask somebody to pick up a new razor for you. Or at least make sure you don't go to "Goldberg's Pharmacy"
mark_evans_fml 0
Scissors, silly.
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Comments (116)
TheAntiComment 0
I have a nazi uniform if you want to borrow it...
Heidi_fml 0
Someone has submitted one almost exactly like this before.... STUPID.
Kassad_fml 0
Lol this must be one of the best fake fml... lame...well I never knew that electric razor does go on battery since they never sell it where I live.
xillentz 0
serves you right, sucker.
stinkstankstunk 0
I might have felt bad for you if you hadn't switched verb tenses halfway through your story.
valuemeal2 1
Just ask someone to pick you up a disposable razor at the store on their way home from work or something, and keep it around for "emergencies" next time.
AlienMind 0
Did you "goosestep" around as well?
zoo_fml 0
# 10 is right this exact same FML was done a while ago boring.
mathews666 0
hahah 40 and 3 are hilarioussssss what did u do
themangostar 0
Aren't most newer electric razors rechargeable? Get with the program! You could always use scissors... Or just rip your skin off your face?