Today, while working on my girlfriend of three years' computer I found a file called 'My future wedding'. I assumed it was very old and decided to look through it. Of the list of 5 potential grooms I was not one of them. This didn't bother me until I saw that it had last been edited two days ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found my sister's wedding book. Inside it was a list of potential grooms; she'd written down all of my ex-boyfriends. And my fiancé. We're getting married in three weeks. FML
Today, I looked through my girlfriend's phone book and saw two entries with my name. One had "(cute)" attached to it. I checked to see if it was my number. It wasn't. FML
Today, I was looking at the annoucements in the newspaper and find out that my boyfriend of the past 6 years is supposed to be married in 2 days to what I thought was his ex-girlfriend. FML
Today, my boyfriend asked me if I'd help clean out his ex-girlfriend's closet. I found their wedding photos. FML
Today, while I was looking for a file on my boyfriend's hard drive, I came across photos of a half-naked woman wearing my clothes, but whose head wasn't really visible. When I demanded an explanation, I realised that it wasn't another girl - it was him. FML
Today, my girlfriend started to plan our wedding. We've been going out for 3 days. FML
Today, I was going to propose to my girlfriend of 3 years. I checked the box with the ring to make sure it was still there, and saw a piece of paper in it. It said, "No." FML
Today, I discovered that my fiancé had responded to an online missed connection posting. He has been emailing, exchanging pictures and making plans to go out with this girl. We are supposed to be married in the fall and just put down the non-refundable deposit on our reception site. FML
Today, according to my girlfriend's instant messenger, which she left open on my laptop, I am her rough shag on the side while she searches for a guy who is husband material that her parents will approve of. I guess the engagement ring in my bag is going back to the shop. FML
Today, I'm planning my big sister's wedding. My long-term, live-in boyfriend walked by and saw me looking at the wedding tab on Pinterest, smirked, and said, "Don't get your hopes up." I had. FML
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Top comments
Star18lk 0
OMG dump her!!!! That proves she doesnt care about you.!!!
RuralNinja 0
Of course there's a good explanation - she's sleeping around. With 5 other guys. She'll probably marry the one who has the most money. You should dump her now while you're ahead.
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Comments (124)
Star18lk 0
OMG dump her!!!! That proves she doesnt care about you.!!!
skaffz 0
noo don't dump her, just cheat on her :]
actorkidrox 0
With five different people =)
leisl14 0
Cheat on her with her 5 potenial grooms and then dump her.
Reyo 2
All you have to do is leave the file open on her computer. The next time she looks at it, she'll see the file open, but won't remember opening it. Then she'll know that you were working on her computer, and therefore had to be the one who opened it. THAT'S when you show up behind her and ask "Whatcha looken at?"
liveBabylon 0
AMAZING plan Bravo :)
Powernade 1
If she has a pet, run it over, then dump her. You really need to drive home the point about her being flaky, and women only speak emotion. Having your pet run over roughly translates to: "You should have given me more love" and dumping her translates to: "You're a bitch," so thats about as close as you can get.
_Noon_ 0
Sorry?? :| That's a sick minded plan. Why would you hurt an innocent animal? There are so much better ways to screw her over.
GreenHacker 0
Have sex with her. What else matters?
Randalltk421 0
I could be wrong here...but I think the "last edited" info updates every time a file is opened. So she could have just been clicking through and reading some old files and not actually editing it.
claiiire_fml 17
58 is ****** up in the head.
STVader 0
second
Thespade_fml 0
Third there could be a good explanation for this
Rachel_Vikram 0
Perhaps she did make it ages ago and just looked at it for memories. If I was her and made a "future wedding plan" then I wouldn't change it, even if I got a boyfriend. It would be her memories. Some computers count viewing as editing. I know mine does.
RuralNinja 0
Of course there's a good explanation - she's sleeping around. With 5 other guys. She'll probably marry the one who has the most money. You should dump her now while you're ahead.
TurtleSmile 14
This is a good thing. Better break up with her now before you're married, instead of 7 years later. You just saved years of your life, congrats!
CorruptAngel920 18
But... he's not one of the potential grooms?
jessxoxo28 5
she is definitely ur soul mate
saraa_c 0
hahahahhahahaha.
ADOG2645 17
ye
jonnymohio 2
She's only using you for your computer skills. Dump her now and give her a virus.
Sirrush 0
She's probably already gotten a few "viruses" from her potential marriage partners, don't you think?
Cattiva 0
Yeah, venerical virus xD
BikerMike 0
**** that ignorant **** in the ass, cum on her back and then stick your shitty dick into her mouth.
finally_fml 0
#10 you are so damn right
BikerMike 0
then he would be known as a kitty ******
Vaetrus 0
This is not where you show off your "cool acts" you just read about on UB. Go be stupid elsewhere.
Peroxide 3
who else clicked on #10's profile to see his pic after mercy's comment? I really didn't need to see that while eating. Thanks mercy ya bitch.
elisa_sanchez91 0
LMAO i did XD
icecreamthoughts 0
Doesn't it bother you more that your girlfriend spends time making lists like this?
plexico 4
She's just fantasizing about what a good life would be. Don't worry, she will end up marrying you because most people settle for what they can get. Do you know the 5 potential grooms? Are they out of her league?
morgan020 0
of course they're out her of her league or she would be dating one of them instead :) dont worry she will probably marry you because shes already been with you for a while and it takes too much effort to break in a new boyfriend if not at least you know shes not planning on it and can start getting emotionally detatched now :)
plexico 4
Congrats on obtaining that realistic cynicism at such a young age. Some of us had years of having our idealistic, romantic fantasies dashed -- often in humiliating, degrading ways -- to obtain our crusty shell of bitterness. You are on the fast track to being able to successfully deal with the real world.
pleasetryagain 0
I'm going to assume that he's not so stupid to mix up a fantasy list of actors with a list of real people. Besides, it's stranger that's she's analyzing potential marriage partners in lists rather than... dating someone and falling in love.