Today, I was pulling out of my driveway and was watching out for the flowers I'd just planted. I moved my head to look out of my window to avoid them, not realizing my window was up. I then hit my head, broke my nose and drove all over the flowers. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I ran into a car. I suffered a concussion and broke my nose. I wasn't driving. I walked right into it. It was parked. FML
Today, I parked, then opened my car door to get out, and somehow managed to practically knock myself out by banging my head on the frame, then on the car door that had slammed back into my forehead as I was still reeling from hitting the roof. A guy walking by asked if I was okay while trying not to laugh. FML
Today, while taking pills for a headache, I threw my head back to help get the pills down, and in the process, whacked it against the brick windowsill behind me. FML
Today, while scrubbing my car with the foam brush at a car wash, the hose for the brush came whipping around and smacked me hard in the side of the head, knocking off my glasses. I got disoriented from the blow and stepped on my glasses, completely smashing them. FML
Today, I gave the back door a slight nudge to make sure it was latched shut. Of course, it flew wide open, causing me to smash my face into the doorframe, fall out onto the back porch writhing in pain, and have blood pissing out of my face. FML
Today, I got a concussion and several staples in my head. As it turns out, watering flowers is much more dangerous than it might sound. FML
Today, I crashed my car. I saw a deer getting ready to run into the middle of the road, and I was very sleepy, so I panicked and slammed on the brakes, causing me to lose control of the car on the wet road. After I hit a tree, I realized that the deer was a plastic lawn ornament. FML
Today, I was practicing my golf swing on my front lawn. I took a swing and on the backstroke the golf club slipped out of my hands. Next thing I know, it hits a neighbor's window, shatters it, and goes right into their living room. FML
Today, I had an unexpected sneezing fit and drove my car through 2 trees and a fence. FML
Today, I leaned back and bumped into one of my mom's plants in the window. The good thing was that I caught it before it fell and shattered. The bad thing was that my mom likes to keep cactii in the window. I can still feel thorns I haven't managed to pluck out yet. FML
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Top comments
Some_guy 6
Today, I was well-rooted in the soil. I was soaking up some rays and generally enjoying being a flower, when some jackass backed over me with their car. FML.
WhyMe1_2_3 0
on the bright side, if your windows were/are clean enough to be mistaken for being down, your doing a kickass job at cleaning :D
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Comments (85)
bbyxyo 0
hahhaha , nice one .
areforever 0
Looks like you're the one *puts on sunglasses* who got planted. YEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH
manyourlifesucks 0
Well that was a stupid first comment
Gwen4var 31
^ Would you have preferred it if he had said something along the lines of "First"?
AAAcheetahgrl 0
im so tired of these stupid FMLs. So what? you hurt yourself, thats not unusual.
Some_guy 6
Today, I was well-rooted in the soil. I was soaking up some rays and generally enjoying being a flower, when some jackass backed over me with their car. FML.
El_Mero_Mero 0
haha!
ItsJustMe1616 26
This is one of the only good "other perspective" replies I have read lol
mcsnelly 5
How can you not tell if your window is up? YDI
jaden242 2
becuase he used windex!
Fisshie 0
hah and you ran over the flowers.. smooth
pchands00 0
I did this once trying to back into my driveway... it really hurt, and you'd be surprised how easy of a mistake it is, especially if your not moving fast and your somebody who usually drives with the windows down
mattiscool 0
YDI for saying "proceeded"
martialart1st18 19
Are you stupid or just dumb?
ItsJustMe1616 26
Maybe it's just me, but I don't see the word proceeded in this FML....
ItsJustMe1616 26
So after going through the comments I discovered that anyone who read this post after 2009 when it was posted, apparently the word "proceeded" was removed because everyone posting in 2010 and later have all mentioned at the horrible grammar in the last sentence. If the word proceeded was part of the last sentence at one point in time, the last sentence would be correct (at least tense wise). So my question is, what happened to the word proceeded?
oh_dee 0
Uhm, I doubt that you hit your head into the window SO hard that you broke your nose and not the window as well. Smells fake to me...
lovelylaura1459 0
How do you break your nose by bumping you head on the window? You must look out windows with quite some force :/
tWitt3rBuG 0
Aint that what the side rear view mirrors for? Do you like hurt yourself you check your blindspots on the motorway? Dude, now seriously...