munchkin
France
Today, I ran into a car. I suffered a concussion and broke my nose. I wasn't driving. I walked right into it. It was parked. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Too tall for this shit
Fresno, United States
Fiat 500 woes
Today, I parked, then opened my car door to get out, and somehow managed to practically knock myself out by banging my head on the frame, then on the car door that had slammed back into my forehead as I was still reeling from hitting the roof. A guy walking by asked if I was okay while trying not to laugh. FML
Anonymous
Orange, United States
Today, I had my first car crash. I ran into a parked car and the owner saw it happen. I then accidentally opened my door straight into her car as well when I went to give her my information. FML
tracelee
United States
Today, I hit a parked car. I was walking. To make the scene more embarrassing, the car alarm shocked me and I backed up quickly into the parking meter, knocking me down once more. FML
Chops
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Bystander
Today, I was walking from my office to the place I had parked my car, a distance of approximately three blocks. As I was about to round the last corner, I was forced to dive out of the way of a speeding car. When I looked up, I noticed that it was my car. FML
ttsutaoka
United States
Today, I was involved in a car accident. I wasn't the driver of either car. I happened to be a passerby that was hit by a falling stop sign as a car hit it. FML
A. Person
Mexico
Today, I was t-boned by a car that sent mine flying into five parked cars. My car was totalled. As the person who hit me pulled me out of the right side of the car he said, "Sorry. I sneezed." FML
funnyguyNOT
United States
Funny how?
Today, a car was waiting for me to cross the street so I thought it would be funny to slowly limp across the street. When I got to the end, I jumped as high as I could to show I was faking. Turns out I tripped and hit my head hard on the sidewalk. That car took me to the hospital. FML
Clumsy Clumsy
Spruce Grove, Canada
Today, I ran up to my boyfriend to kiss him when he got home from work. I tripped and I fell on him, and he fell backwards. He ended up hitting his head on the sidewalk and had to get stitches. He also had a concussion. FML
anon
Edison, United States
Today, I got hit by a car while walking into the hospital to visit my wife, who had also gotten hit by a car. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, while I was on the bus, my foot fell asleep. When we arrived at my stop, I stood up and limped to the front of the bus. As I walked down the steps, I tripped, fell, and smashed my nose into the ground. The driver just laughed and drove away. FML
Top comments
Brittani090270 1
This sounds like something I would do. =)
noshitsherlock 0
wow, you are a special kind of STUPID.
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Comments (87)
Brittani090270 1
This sounds like something I would do. =)
Zhejan 0
I really hate what FML has come to these days. Months ago, the stories used to be simple, original, and funny. Now, about 95% of the stories are about the person's own stupidity, and the idiot thinks that they're "clever" by wording the FML to make it seem funny. "I walked right into it. It was parked." Who the hell speaks like that? A normal person says "Today, I accidentally walked into a parked car and suffered a concussion." Also, you start the FML by saying you ran, then you said you walked. I highly doubt that you can pick up enough speed just by walking to concuss yourself and break your own nose. Either way, this site has gone down the drain, and the stories are fake. You disappoint me, FML /rant
metakingt 0
I must say cars are coming in insane nose crushing and concussion causing park speeds these days.
AnaMaree 0
*sigh* Another "I remember when FML was good" complainer.
GreenHacker 0
Sigh, another "'I remember when FML was good' complainer" complainer.
pinkinsane10 0
If this site is so stupid then why you on it?
nabzilla 0
that's cos with the popularity of fml the meaning of the term has changed. remember lol it was once upon a time actually used because someone laughed out loud to something. but nowadays its just a word we say to fill in the awkward silences.
Funkengine12 0
While I agree with you about FML going down hill, I don't see your beef with people writing creatively. True, nobody actually talks the way he worded this post, but do you think authors writing popular books write the same way they would talk to their friends? This post is a bad example, as it fairly screams fake, but I for one am all for people trying to make their posts more interesting with different language. Also, OP, if you're going to post a fake, use one that makes anatomical sense. This wouldn't hurt you that badly unless you're a poorly constructed piñata. And not an awesome one from Viva Piñata, either.
omgiitsme03 0
when I read this all I could think of was ummmm. watch where you're going next time.
shoelaces301 0
people say "i ran into" just to show they bumped into it or something idiot
clojo1112 0
#18 don't take the fun out of things. you're taking everything way too literally and it is funny when someone walks into a car. and he started it with ran because that's the typical thing you say when you run into something. who the he'll says "I bumped into the table"? the use the word run.
chococat251 9
I did that to but I only got a mark on my leg plus i was racing a friend to see who could touch the car first (I won!:))
flylikemusic 0
I find it very impressive that you've discovered a way to walk with your head in your ass. I'd say you figure out a sweet story so you don't have to explain this to your friends when they see your ******-up nose. Sorry you got hurt, but you definitely deserve it.
Shadow1368 17
I have a question for u OP, how is that even possible?!?!? :P YDI
alewiina 0
-snickers- I have to say, this is something I would do. But only if I was suffieciently distracted - I walked into a bus stop pole once because I was reading something. But you must have hit that pretty hard to get those injuries... were you speed walking? o.O
UsernameHere_ 0
LMAO at #2...but I once hit a car with my bike...no injuries though
604 11
tool
Cristaderzi 0
I duuno of you were drunk ir on a mobike the a HUGE YDI!!! However some like myself when on meds (life and death meds). Then fyl...
chococat251 9
I did that before but i was talking to my friend while we were seeing who could touch the car first but I won at least
perdix 31
Either you were texting or you conceived the Grand Unification Theory of Physics. Anyone want to take bets which it was?
Brave_Sir_Robin 4
I throw down $5.27 for "Reading the 'F My Life' book while listening to Miley Cirus" Odds are at 25:1
chococat251 9
But I did that before but running
noshitsherlock 0
wow, you are a special kind of STUPID.
pinkinsane10 0
I did this but I was riding my bike when I hit the car
manjunk 0
i rode my bicycle into a parked car and i felt silly, you must have wanted to die =|