Today, I was playing football for my school. I had the ball and was running down the sideline. The guy behind pulled my flag off along with my shorts and boxers. I dove to try to escape and I happened to land on the hottest girl in the class who was on the sideline. I had no pants on. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, while I was playing football with a friend, my sister wanted to join in. She was messing around with the ball at the start, then suddenly she kicked the ball through my legs, pulled my shorts down and kneed me in the nuts. FML
Today, at my volleyball tournament I was extremely pumped to start playing so I went to take my sweats off and everybody began to stare at me then I looked down to come to realize I had no spandex on, just a thong. FML
Today, I went to a football sleepover with all of my teammates. I felt something near the bottom of my sleeping bag, and I pulled it up with my foot. My entire team watched me pull out a red thong. My parents had been on a camping trip the week before. FML
Today, I was at basketball practice and my coach asked me how my knee was. When I lifted my pants to show him, my cheetah print thong that had been stuck inside the pants from the dryer flew out to the ground. FML
Today, I was in gym class talking to a guy I like. My friend then decided to come up behind me and pants me, pulling down my underwear along with them. His only comment? "Someone needs to shave." FML
Today, during gym class, I wanted to show off in front of my classmates by doing a headstand in the middle of the gym. I wanted to hold the position, except my shirt came out of my pants and exposed my belly and breasts to all my classmates. Everyone burst out laughing. It was so embarrassing. FML
Today, I was practicing soccer at my school. My team was practicing penalty kicks. It was my turn up and this cute girl that I like was watching off ten feet away from the goal. I was running to take the kick when I slipped and kicked the ball. It hit her head and now she won't talk to me. FML
Today, I was on my run, running past the home of the very attractive guy in my English class. This time he was outside. As I was running I casually waved, he waved back, but because I was distracted, I didn't notice a rock on the sidewalk and ended up tripping and pantsing myself. FML
Today, I was playing ball with my student during recess. My first attempt at throwing the ball hit him in the head. My second attempt hit him in the crotch. FML
Today, we were playing dodgeball at school. I tried to duck and jump around so the idiots on the other team couldn't nail me with the ball. Mid-jump, it tore through the air and smashed straight into my ballsack, sending me curling into a fetal position on the floor. I feel like I got sterilized. FML
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Top comments
SekC 0
You should of asked her out.
Peroxide 3
TOUCHDOWN!!!
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Comments (208)
hXcsoccerplaya 0
how is that a **** your life?! more like a my life is awesome moment. your complaining about falling on an extremely hot girl with no pants on. let that sink in for a moment..
jjcooper 0
I bet she liked it
christennis 0
you should have just asked her out right then and there.
nemo3590 0
Fake. I mean, really.
anjyu22 0
I hope this one's real because it's awesome!
beertime36 0
next time you see her, smile. you definately should get her as a girlfriend. funny story to tell about how you guys came together.
patticake1601 0
dove? why do americans think that dove is the past tense of dive? way to screw up the english language
flying_vegan 0
Erm, dove IS the past tense of dive. Whilst it is chiefly a North American word, it has been acceptable as part of the English lexicon for several hundred years.
ILIEKGIRLS 5
BAM!
emumcman 0
Both dived and dove are standard as the past tense of dive. Dived, historically the older form, is somewhat more common in edited writing, but dove occurs there so frequently that it also must be considered standard: The rescuer dove into 20 feet of icy water. Dove is an Americanism that probably developed by analogy with alternations like drive, drove and ride, rode. It is the more common form in speech in the northern United States and in Canada, and its use seems to be spreading. The past participle of dive is always dived.
Scotticus117 11
kinda like hanged and hung then?
fudrick 0
$84, it's called a dialect. It's not "screwing up the English language." If making changes to a language is screwing it up, I guess brits screwed up the Latin/Germanic/etc languages...
Tequilamockngbrd 7
Geez, #101. If you're going to criticize (yes, I totally spelled that with a z) people for butchering the English language, don't try to prove your point with bad grammar. Run-on sentences aren't cool. I promise I'm not a grammar Nazi. :P The irony was just funny.
GDinNJ 0
pointerdog, shut the **** up. I'm sorry that we, Americans (and Canadians, apparently), residents of the continent thousands of miles away from your home, speak differently than you do. Obviously we're going to use YOUR language to create ours, you ******* colonized much of North America. Obviously we're going to change it as time passes, we're thousands of miles away from you (as I previously stated). Now stop complaining because OUR language (yes, our English language. Would you rather that I say you and I speak the exact same language? Because we don't. We spell words differently and we have different verb tenses) is different from yours and be happy that you probably don't see all that many Americans. (I'm assuming you live in GB based on your clear unhappiness with Canadians/Americans). And stop trying to be a grammar Nazi when the reason for the "mistake" is obviously a culture/language thing. Try to spend more time attacking people who actually are ruining English (AKA: ppl who like 2 type like ths).
fudrick 0
How can you hate individual Americans for something the society as a whole did many years ago? I had no control over the changing of the language, and to be honest I use some British phrases that not many Americans use. It's not like I hate Britain or whatever I just hate the ones that hate all Americans because most Americans are arrogant morons. That's like hating all Germans because of the Nazis.
PrinceTwilight17 0
Oh please the English language is already messed up. Even weird is spelled weirdly.
Harry_Poochi 0
Pointer, "You're anger?" Really? And you complain about Americans butchering the English language.
nefariousnobo 0
"Distance from the source does not require you to change it?" No, it's not distance from the source, it's just the evolution of language. Obviously, the languages won't evolve the same, since they are seperated. Don't tell me English is the same over in Great Britain as it was hundreds of years ago.
IMTHEGREATEST 0
Besides, everyone knows that British people aren't really people, they're more like walking bags of tea and crumpets who sound like duchebags and have bad teeth. I'd make fun of cricket too, but in all fairness it's better than baseball.
deaththrash505 0
lol he's just upset because America beat those pansy tea drinkers. FREEDOM!
i_luv_cheese 0
hows that an FML? you practically got to second base! bow chicka wow wow
kukopia 0
Way to show the world you don't know what 'second base' is... apparently you've never been there!!
Jimboom 12
How is this a FYL? You got to throw yourself semi-naked on top of a hot girl and not get arrested for it!
marshmallowmouse 0
Sounds like the perfect time to ask for her number!