Today, I was pestering a co-worker, so she jokingly stated "I'll bury you!" and I replied "I'll bury your mom!". Her moms funeral was last week. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my coworker left a tiny mess in the break room. I cleaned it up and jokingly said, "Your mother isn't here to clean up after you." She started crying. I forgot her mom died last week. FML
Today, one of my coworkers decided it'd be funny to tell our boss that I made creepy comments about his teenage daughter. The worst part is that the aforementioned lying coworker is my mother. I wish I was joking. FML
Today, I jokingly told my mother to "go fall down a hole" during a mock argument we always have. Not even 10 minutes later, our basement stairs gave out. When I said that, I didn't want her to break both her arms or to actually fall into a gaping hole. FML
Today, I overheard my girlfriend telling her friend, "Actually, it's a good thing she died, she was quite a bitch." She was talking about my mother. FML
Today, I was working as a camp counselor helping a five year-old girl. I heard her mumble, "My grandpa is getting married on Saturday." I enthusiastically replied and told her how exciting that was! Only after did I realize that she'd said "buried." FML
Today, we buried my mom. I walked past my sister's husband just in time to hear him mutter: "Hope the fire's nice and hot down there, you old hag." I told my sister. She wouldn't believe me and accused me of trying to start drama. FML
Today, my mom came over to me and whispered something in my ear. I didn't hear it and assumed it was a joke, so I started laughing. Turns out my aunt died. FML
Today, I ran into an old friend. I asked her how she was doing, then asked, "And your mum?" Just as the words escaped my lips, I remembered her mum died a few years ago. Trying to save face, I messed up again and blurted, "She still in the same graveyard?" FML
Today, my friend beat me at a video game. He got smug, so I made an "I fucked your mom" style joke. Yeah, kina forgot for a minute that his mom died last year. FML
Today, I intentionally caused my parents to have an intensely heated argument when I asked them how and where they first met. Dad said it was at a funeral, and mom said it was at a burial. FML
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Top comments
Matisse_fml 0
Happens to the best of us. I once shared my thoughts on the "very special forces" article on The Onion's website to an acquaintance at work. It turned out that his brother was mentally disabled. FML
Timmytwofinger 0
what a tard, can people get off mums cause i just got off all of yours.
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Comments (44)
foodlord 5
Your mum is the 1 who brought up burying in the first place :D
livelobster123 14
They're not dead as long as Waylon Moosberger's here, bitch.
sarah56195 0
Don't make your mom Jokes. Their rude.
xRezSynn 15
That's what you get for saying all those 'your mom' jokes.
whatever202 11
Serves you right for using "your mom" as a comeback. Lamest retort ever.
nyrangersfan9 13
Congratulations for having the comeback of a 12 year old boy
looms123 9
Though i can't see comment #6 because it attracted too many negative votes, the fact that it says "comment buried" makes it automatically hilarious
Thoricsteam20 24
That is so horrible.
writerchic85 26
This is precisely the reason I broke my habit of saying "your mom" to joke with people.
tanman230 10
way to hit them with a 3rd grade come back