Today, I was outside when a mouse ran toward my feet. There was a wall behind me, so I tried to jump over him. He changed course, and I landed on him. It crunched. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was sitting on my couch when I felt something weird underneath me. I got up, thinking I'd sat on my phone or something. Wrong. I'd sat on a live mouse. FML
Today, I woke up to what sounded like twigs snapping. Turns out it was the skull of a live mouse being crushed in my cat's jaws. FML
Today, I set a trap to catch a mouse that ran across my foot. Not only did the trap shut on my finger twice, but I watched the mouse run over the trap without it snapping shut. I guess I have a new roommate. FML
Today, I found out what mouse intestines squashed against my bare feet feels like. FML
Today, as I was about to leave my house in my brand new heels, I stepped on a dead mouse. My heel went through it. FML
Today, I went to put my coat on to go out. I put my hand in my pocket, not knowing there was a mouse sleeping in there. I squeezed it, it bit me and ran off. FML
Today, I woke up to my cat slowly dragging her paw across my face. I opened my eyes to see a bloody mouse dangling an inch from my face. It was still twitching. FML
Today, my cat brought home a bloody, barely-living mouse. The thing managed to escape and dragged itself into a crack in the wall, where it must have died. The only way to get it out before it starts to stink up the place is by demolishing the wall. FML
Today, I set up a mouse trap to kill the rodent plaguing my kitchen. While lying in bed, I heard an unmistakable snap, and ran to see what I'd caught. The mouse trap was missing. I now have a large, angry, and possibly dying animal running around my house. FML
Today, I woke up to a mouse sitting on my pillow and chewing on my hair. FML
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Top comments
Monado 0
New version of mouse trap?
ArtIsResistance7 1
Your cat-like reflexes would make you an excellent ninja. Poor mousie :[
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Comments (159)
phippsy95 2
more like f the muse,s life?
Yung23 0
dang 85 is sexy
Booper711 0
fatty haha jk
ToNstAAr 8
I winced when I read this…
twignig 0
gah me too.
chantelfurtado 0
ewwwww WTF
Anon9002 0
OP is Mario. Should have shoot fireballs at it instead.
UnluckyDom 0
FTRL **** The Rats Life
musicman226 0
This sounds like another fml I no of
ttyl99 0
I find it funny that ur name is the killer yet ummm ur scared of a little tiny mouse
ninjasaurous 0
Poor moussyyyyy=,[