Today, I was mugged by a street preacher. The same one who'd earlier in the day screamed at me for being an evil sinner. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, a drunk man wearing a sandwich-board proclaiming that, "The end is nigh" threw some so-called holy water at me while bellowing, "It's what Jesus would've wanted" and that I should "repent for being an evil shite." FML
Today, after volunteering all day at the homeless shelter, I was mugged on my way to my car. FML
Today, I went out of my way to avoid street preachers thrusting hateful propaganda at me. A young woman ran up to me and started waving paper in my face, and I snapped at her to fuck off. Right afterwards I realised she was returning something that fell out of my pocket. She looked terrified. FML
Today, I got mugged by a midget. FML
Today, I was mugged by a guy in a Santa suit. FML
Today, while going to work, I was mugged. On the way back, I was mugged. FML
Today, I got mugged. I also got an extra kick in the face for not having money in my wallet. FML
Today, a man pulled me violently into an alleyway and informed me I was being mugged. Being a body-builder, I said, "Oh yeah? Go on then." He kicked my ass in a matter of seconds, stole my wallet, then farted on my bruised face. He called me a wimp. FML
Today, while walking down the street, I was violently beaten up by a man in a Darth Vader outfit. FML
Today, I got mugged. For an actual mug. FML
Feel like sharing it with the other FML users?
Thanks, your FML was submitted, and will appear in the moderation queue soon!
Top comments
Soloman212 28
Maybe he wanted to take judgement into his own hands? Or maybe it was a facade so he could later catch you off guard. No one suspects the priests.
courtney680 17
Oh the irony..
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (96)
DFresh503 8
I've heard of the church wanting their tithings, but this is ridiculous!
justawallflower 27
Can't trust all preachers... as a Christian I speak from experience