Today, I had to explain to my girlfriend that taking triple the maximum dosage of painkillers won't actually triple its effects. She rolled her eyes, called me clueless, and said that I should "leave this stuff to the professionals." She's studying to become a doctor. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my step-mom that my medication is causing me to lose weight. She looked me up and down and suggested I triple my dosage. FML
Today, the medicine I keep at my desk for headaches is now gone thanks to my coworker who took the last 6 Advil at once. Her reasoning? "You're thin, so you wouldn't need them anyway. I'm twice your size, so I needed twice the dose." FML
Today, my girlfriend came back from visiting her family. She'd forgotten to take her pills, and decided to "catch up" by taking almost a week's worth of birth control and prescription pills. She's fine, but I had to convince the ER staff that she's not suicidal, just stupid. FML
Today, my roommate was complaining about a headache, so I offered her some aspirin. She looked at me like I was stupid and said, "Uh… That stuff's only for heart attacks." I'm living with an idiot. FML
Today, my mother won't give me any painkillers for my migraine. She believes that "When medicine goes into your stomach, the acids stop the medicine from working" and that "It's all in people's heads when medicine works". FML
Today, after a 20-minute conversation, I'm still unable to convince my grandmother that Tylenol and Acetaminophen are the same thing. I just graduated med school. FML
Today, my boyfriend called me, panicking. Apparently he had a headache, but wasn't concentrating on what tablets he grabbed, and accidentally took tablets for "relief of period pain". He was convinced he was going to grow ovaries overnight. FML
Today, after getting my wisdom teeth pulled, I woke up from a much needed nap realizing I should take my pain medication. My mother then told me she had thrown them out so I wouldn't get addicted and become a drug dealer. FML
Today, I went to the hospital for crippling back pain that made it impossible to walk. The doctor was more interested in telling me off for not taking a pill that he admitted doesn't help acute pain. He then gave me an injection that wore off in an hour, and sent me home, telling me to take over the counter meds. FML
Today, I kindly explained to a client that she had calculated her CD interest wrong. She kindly responded that, as a nurse, she would never give me medical treatment if I was involved in a car accident. FML
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Top comments
rg350dx 29
Write this moment down and remind her of it in four years and ask again who's clueless.
DocBastard 40
Cryptic17 - No, the thing that will increase is the concentration if the drug in her bloodstream, and when you increase the plasma concentration, you generally increase the response. SapphireVelvet is right - OP IS clueless.
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Comments (168)
abbttmc 12
When arguing with a woman- you're always wrong!
rg350dx 29
Write this moment down and remind her of it in four years and ask again who's clueless.
someteenager 13
No. Even when they're wrong, they cry, and are somehow not wrong again. That or they just withhold sex.
Mossears133 15
But he did write this moment down, that's how we know about it.........
rg350dx 29
She clearly already has her PHD. If that meant Pretty Huge Dumbass
isallwaysme 27
Imagine her as your doctor..
ninneyfooda 16
You know, she might not be a complete idiot... Just saying
keverdeen 14
Lets hope she still has 4 years to go because if she's a good ways along in medical school I'm very concerned.
BlueFlatts 20
Umm... OP is clueless, as well as most of the people on this thread. I don't understand why so many people think he's right. There are many factors to it probably won't triple the dosage it'll be close enough. Where's your head people? Hell, Alieve says it on the commercial. "Take 2 pills for a day free of pain". I trust DocBastard, my doctor, and common sense. So thumb me down if you must.
Wizardo 34
Bitch is gonna OD way before anything happens if she continues on the road she's on...
TourettesGuyFTW 26
If she dies of an overdose... can I have her stuff?
robotiick7 23
This FML kind of reminds me of the episode of spongebob has till sunset because he at a bomb that was a pie and he was doing heart surgery on squidward
tjv3 10
While it won't be triple the effects it will increase the results
sterlingbaker 8
Medical school is twelve years.
fragmen52 18
Few more months and it will be 4 years
SapphireVelvet 8
She's right. You're clueless.
Cryptic17_fml 4
He not actually clueless the only thing it will triple is the likely hood of a serious side effect such as death
ekat12 6
Side effects may include dry mouth, constipation, or death.
DocBastard 40
Cryptic17 - No, the thing that will increase is the concentration if the drug in her bloodstream, and when you increase the plasma concentration, you generally increase the response. SapphireVelvet is right - OP IS clueless.
Perception 6
It will certainly increase the response, but trying to quantify the exact degree of the drug's effect on a given person is a difficult thing to do. I doubt that the dosage and degree of effect would be linearly proportional.
PharmGirl14 8
Cryptic 17- not all "increased doses" equate to death. For example, a boatload of xanax in a patient not taking other medications would just cause a temporary coma with stable vitals. Another example: there is no.maximum dose of opioid pain medications (it all depends on your tolerance). and, tolerance does not equal addiction. Oyyyy the medical ignorance makes my brain hurt.
wizzbee 13
How is this comment thumbed down? Of course will an increased dose of painkillers give more painrelief. Thats the principle we work by when we give them to cancer patients in palliative care etc. As long as she's under the toxic dose, it will increase the effect. If she combined two she may even get a synergetic effect.
alycion 39
In the Xanax example, I know people who are prescribed a triple dose of what I have. I've had double my painkiller dose prescribed after a surgery. During a mania, I had a med tripled. Safe doses do range.
eyepuppy 31
Wow. Where to start? Well, op is a clueless. There are a lot of factors that play into how much dosage will effect someone. Even so, the plateau effect dose (the dose where the maximum therapeutic effect can be seen) of most pain killers is much higher than the recommended dose (usually near the threshold dosage (dose where minimum therapeutic effect can be seen). Patient's tolerance to a medication can effect both these levels; they are more so generalized for the mass majority of people. By nature, over the counter pain killers are toxic, but the dose where they become lethal is extremely high. I don't want to go more in depth with this because I have better things to do with my time than argue with people who know nothing about what they are talking about, like op. Trust me, I'm an engineer.
adamo_erebus 26
80: but doesn't taking too much of an opioid medication result in respiratory depression and death? you can't really say that opioids don't have a maximum dose.
wizzbee 13
If a person who never tried opiates (morfine, heroine etc.) takes them, they can overdose (supress the need to breathe while in a coma and therefore suffocate), on far far less than a drugaddict. A drugaddict has far fewer receptors for the drug after using it for a while- and therefore need more to get the effect of it.
xNephilim 19
Taking the occasional higher dose of pain killers will not kill you. I've been getting semi-frequent headaches since I was about 11 years old, which led to me having an extremely high tolerance for pain medication. By now, I HAVE to take a higher dose than it says on the bottle because it will not work otherwise. Sure, if you sit there and chew pills like candy for hours on end every day, that's when those side effects will start appearing. But taking higher doses of them every once in a while? No.
LuminousKing 7
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Let her overdose everything she can, the less type of people like her we have on earth, the better.
Koravel 10
Dude, that's a little harsh...we can always just put them on display in a zoo or something
HortonThelephant 15
Hey!! What did we poor zoo animals do to deserver such punishment??
ohgeejosee 19
Woah #4, that was intense. Even real drug addicts shouldn't just DIE, they need help! Besides, if drugs weren't a world wide problem, something else would be.
courtney680 17
You should probably take her to the hospital..
rosha267 21
This is an emergency! My girlfriend took three regular strength over the counter Tylenol!!
SexySlayer1248 18
Who said what kind of pain killer it is?
rosha267 21
That's kind of my point
AshaaFerreira 22
Well I think your point wasn't very clear
courtney680 17
When someone says "pain killer" I don't exactly think of Tylenol. I think more along the lines of Vicodin..
Shmatterhorn 38
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Yeah, she's a real professional all right. A professional loser.
shadowsorel 15
You mean a professional dumbass.
omg36 7
Lol ok mr foreman^^
sotheresthisgirl 8
Watch out, You'll have a foot in your ass.
liv_graham 7
i imagine she's passing med school
ohgeejosee 19
I imagine she is too, considering she's technically right.
CrissyyyS2 22
*Facepalm* I feel bad if you're going to be her dummy.
LappDance 16
I hope she isn't my doctor one day.
mackdeezy 22
At this rate you may not have to worry about that
billyz77 24
I'd love to have her as a doctor. A doc that believes in triple the OxyContin is ok by me. I bet I can sell what I don't use.
fdupagain 11
^ and that's why people who need them can't get them.
Pan1cAttack 2
I'm sure doctors are scouring the site for any indication that their patients are just drug addicts.
lucyy123 14
Where is she even studying to be a doctor?
Freethaawave 19
In Kuwait