Today, I was making out like a sixteen year old at the high school prom with this guy I kinda liked. All of a sudden, he rolls away and tells me he's "finished." We both had our clothes on the entire time. He is 23, I'm 25. I didn't know that was possible. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I made out with a guy that I had just met at a party. It was my first kiss. I don't know what's worse, the fact that my first kiss is at the age of 23, or the fact that I saw him making out with a different girl later on in the night. FML
Today, I went out on a date with a guy significantly older than myself. I told him I really liked him because I can have an intelligent conversation with him, unlike most guys my age. He told me he just wanted to get into my pants. FML
Today, I found out that the 19-year-old I've been seeing is really 26, with two kids and a pregnant fiancée. I'm only 17. FML
Today, after I met a guy online and we'd became fast friends, talking every day about everything, things got flirty after half a year of talking. A year in, I finally got the time to meet up with him. It turns out he lied about his age. He's 8 years younger and in college. I fell head over heels. Help. FML
Today, a slightly older guy friend of mine told me that he thinks of me as a little sister. Immediately afterwards, he tried to make out with me. FML
Today, I was making out with this hot girl at a party. She was a bad kisser and I meant to say, "It's like you're 16 and don't know how to kiss" but it came out as, "It's like I'm kissing a 16 year-old." The room fell silent and she got off my lap with a disturbed look on her face. FML
Today, at school, a guy walked up to me and said I look a little too young to be at high school. I told him that I'm sixteen years old. He stared at my chest for several long seconds, muttered "What the fuck?" and walked off. FML
Today, I took a girl I like to a local band’s show. She didn’t want to dance with me, and after the show she got the lead singer’s number and planned to hang out the next day. We’re both 24, this kid just turned 19. She told me she was only into men her age or older. FML
Today, I had my first date with a cute older guy. What started as a perfect night ended in tears when we ran into my mom at the drugstore while he was buying us beer and condoms. She gave him a verbal lashing of a lifetime and told him my real age, 17. I'd told him I was 22. FML
Today, I met a guy at a bar and we went back to my room. We start having sex and, about 30 seconds in, he stops and says it's not right - he likes me too much for a one night stand. He gives me his number, a kiss on the cheek, and leaves. It turns out that he'd already came. I called his phone - wrong number. FML
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Top comments
fisheatsbear 6
he can just go turn in his penis and his man card in now
ghostwitch1863 0
finished with what? or was that an excuse to get away from you? sounds suspect to me.
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Comments (173)
ElMetalero 0
you shouldve given him a cookie for his hard work
mattbeverly 0
and he jizzed in his pants
GameAddikt 0
lol, that's freackin hilarious
lucidlucia 0
if he wanted to leave cause he wasn't into her, he probly would have said I gotta go. not I'm finished. maybe it was so good for him that he did finish. that should probly be your last time with that guy....but the up side....no messy clean up. it's all in his pants. lol
Fedor_is_KING 0
Wow, pop his top with a kiss. Hey OP, you down for making out with random people you meet over the interwebz?
allmidnighteyes 11
$10 says he's Mormon
Gvil_Eenius 0
Kissing you may have been like kissing a wet sponge and he decided to bail.
Sheryll 0
it means he jizzed in his pants you tards.
mr_miyagi 0
this really never happens you can take my word i want to apologize thats just absurd mainly your fault for the way you were kissing that i jizzed in my pants dont tell your friends or ill say your a **** plus its your fault you were rubbing my butt im very sensitive some would say thats a plus now ill go home and change
HinduSpartan 2
wow he's pathetic