Today, I was jerking off in the train washroom when the ticket inspector knocked at the door. I was nearly done so I didn't open right away. I didn't think he would have the key…I found myself face to face with him and three other passengers. The worst being I didn't have a ticket. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was on the bus, when the inspector asked to see my ticket. I couldn't find it, and ended up being kicked off the bus while a few of the other passengers jeered at me. I found my ticket on the long walk home, buried in my pocket. FML
Today, I was in a rush and had to get changed in a train restroom. While changing, I leaned against the button that opened the door. Not only do train toilet doors open and close very slowly, leaving you half naked for a few seconds, but everyone in the carriage opposite can see clearly. FML
Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML
Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML
Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML
Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML
Today, I had to run to catch my train, so I didn't have time to buy a ticket. When I was the conductor, he was a young man so I opened my top a little, in hopes of not having to pay a fine. When I told him I hadn't bought a ticket he said, "Do your top up, I'm gay." FML
Today, I was using a public toilet stall when the lock gave way, and the door swung open halfway. I froze, and the person who was washing his hands at the sinks looked at me in the mirror and awkwardly said, “I see you.” I muttered, “I’m sorry,” as he walked out looking like he'd seen a ghost. FML
Today, the C-train was packed and I was stuck with a homeless man pressed up against me. He was staring at me intently, and two minutes into the ride he got an erection, which was rubbed against me at every single bump and turn of the train. FML
Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML
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Top comments
inlimbo11 0
"I get off by jerking off in public bathrooms, FML."
banana2022 4
Why would you jack off on a train you ******* weirdo?? That's disgusting, blue balls or not.
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Comments (55)
liy223 6
why is it guys seem to be able (and eager) to do that sort of thing at anytime, any place? honestly, show a little restraint or you totally deserve to get caught. ( just one girls opinion...)
kensikos 6
maybe if girls would be a little more willing to get ****** then we wouldn't have this problem, obviously this is the female problem, them being bitches makes life hard for males!!
Sunny_Eclipse 6
Dude... Why? Just...why?
Starcatch77 20
Ash's face made that comment even more perfect.
atreyafail_666 4
at least u dont have to move much. the train does it for you
99problemz 0
Lol
yowassup44 0
Nicee (:
tj4234 36
just follow what Billy Conolly said to do. Tell them you saw a spider on it and were trying to get it off you :)
BloodyMary666 24
I´m really wondering how anyone would be able to get horny in a train washroom. I most certainly wouldn´t =/
jaden4186 0
you are a sick person and you need mental help.
courk94 6
Eeeeww .. what kind of Siick fk does that anyways ?? Geeez .. Get some decency about yourself . . .
justfienne 12
Way to defile a train bathroom that you didn't even pay to be able defile in the first place...
SerialKisser 1
Ok, just wondering..at what point did it occur to you that it was a good idea to do that ON a train first of all, and second of all...in a public restroom?! Save this "activity" for your bedroom where you have privacy.