Today, I was jerking off in the train washroom when the ticket inspector knocked at the door. I was nearly done so I didn't open right away. I didn't think he would have the key…I found myself face to face with him and three other passengers. The worst being I didn't have a ticket. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was on the bus, when the inspector asked to see my ticket. I couldn't find it, and ended up being kicked off the bus while a few of the other passengers jeered at me. I found my ticket on the long walk home, buried in my pocket. FML
You ain't seen me, right
Today, I was in a rush and had to get changed in a train restroom. While changing, I leaned against the button that opened the door. Not only do train toilet doors open and close very slowly, leaving you half naked for a few seconds, but everyone in the carriage opposite can see clearly. FML
Today, I went on a busy train. I packed myself in close to a very good looking woman and, too scared to say anything, looked out the window. After feeling a hand on my ass, I assumed it was her. To not ruin the moment, I didn't look back. After a few stops, I looked back. It was an old man. FML
Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML
Today, I was on a train when an old man standing next to me very obviously checked me out, caught my eye, and winked. He spent the next five minutes rubbing his penis against my leg. When I turned to tell him off, the train lurched, and the old man fell face first into my breasts. FML
Today, the subway was extremely crowded and I ended up with my butt in a man's crotch. I kept trying to inch away or turn a different way, but there was no room. He could have turned to face the doors, but didn't. He got an erection. I was on there with him for 20 minutes. FML
Nice try, Sheila
Today, I had to run to catch my train, so I didn't have time to buy a ticket. When I was the conductor, he was a young man so I opened my top a little, in hopes of not having to pay a fine. When I told him I hadn't bought a ticket he said, "Do your top up, I'm gay." FML
Infrastructure
Today, I was using a public toilet stall when the lock gave way, and the door swung open halfway. I froze, and the person who was washing his hands at the sinks looked at me in the mirror and awkwardly said, “I see you.” I muttered, “I’m sorry,” as he walked out looking like he'd seen a ghost. FML
Today, the C-train was packed and I was stuck with a homeless man pressed up against me. He was staring at me intently, and two minutes into the ride he got an erection, which was rubbed against me at every single bump and turn of the train. FML
Today, I took a crowded train home. I was holding on to the rail when an old man started rubbing his crotch across my hand. I moved my hand but he moved too and kept doing it. When I moved my hand higher, he started licking it. I had to wait ten minutes for the next stop. FML
Top comments
inlimbo11 0
"I get off by jerking off in public bathrooms, FML."
banana2022 4
Why would you jack off on a train you ******* weirdo?? That's disgusting, blue balls or not.
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Comments (55)
redmonkey224539 9
Who the **** jacks off on public transportYDI
writergirl23 19
Serves him right for barging in
littlebluepill 1
I would say F the lives of the ticket inspector and the people waiting in line to go after you - not only did they have to witness that, they have to use the bathroom after you. Surely you can't be that desperate that you can't wait till you get home? Erk.
RyanB1993 5
And, you couldn't wait till you got home why?
StingRay_RZA 16
This is well and truly a new level of low... ******* hell man have some self control!!
Dusksoul2001 13
YDI for getting on a train without a ticket . Seriously OP?
OzzmosizDoge 6
Why the **** would you jack off in a train bathroom???
yeemahlifesucks 10
Today, I was on the train, and I really had to go. It was locked and no one came out for 5min, so I asked for someone to open the door. As he opened it, we found someone wanking. FML
dubravka14 1
YDI completely
squeekstir 10
Today, I had heard odd noises from the train's restroom that I was conducting. It turns out some sicko was jerking off inside! Me and several other passengers had caught eye contact and he didn't even have a ticket...