Today, I was having a dream about Chris Pratt. Instead of having a sexy dream that I would have enjoyed, I dreamt he was a supervisor at my work. He kept telling me how much I sucked. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I had a dream that I met my celebrity crush. As I leant in to kiss him, he rejected me saying, “Woah no thanks.” Cool, I get rejected even in my dreams. FML
Today, I had a dream that I was 25, unemployed, living with my parents, and still completely in love with someone who no longer feels the same way about me. Oh wait... it wasn't a dream. FML
Today, I woke up and realized that the "nice dream" I'd had was just about talking to people. FML
Today, I woke up from an amazing dream. I dreamt that I got a promotion at work and doubled my income, the dream was so great that I tried so hard not to wake up. When I did wake up it was 10 o'clock, two hours late for work I noticed I had a voicemail from my boss. I was fired for being late. FML
Today, I found out that the dream in which I drunkenly phoned my boss and called him a "fat useless piece of shit" actually did happen. I woke up to 10 missed calls and 5 angry texts stating I was fired. FML
Today, I had a beautiful dream. I dreamed that I somehow got into Stanford University, but in class I couldn't keep up with them. In reality, I'm terrible at school. FML
Today, I had a dream about the damn cappuccino machine at work. FML
Today, I had a dream that I kicked the moon like a soccer ball. It started swearing in my boyfriend's voice. That part wasn't a dream. FML
Today, I was taking phone calls. In my dreams. That's just how horrible my job is. FML
Today, I woke up to the realization that I had slept through my alarm, missed a crucial work meeting, and dreamt that I was the CEO of a company that manufactured alarm clocks. I now fear that my subconscious is mocking me. FML
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Top comments
kaylizs 20
Any dream about Chris Pratt is a wet dream.
jet223 20
Well it depends on what you were sucking on. It could have still been a sexy dream.
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Comments (66)
AyeJay101 25
Maybe you're into that S&M stuff unconsciously and you were "sucking" a lot?
4thepower 7
Role play?
worldclassrager 41
If you could control dreams you could have had it become a sexual fantasy...
fpants2010 18
"Yeah baby, I'll show you how much I suck" ;)
kilbridedoesfml 13
That's awesome at least you got to have a dream with Chris Prat aka Star Lord.
sledking 4
Chris Pratt put Lk Stevens WA on the map! #NWPRIDE
ouijacorn 9
I once dreamed that Kit Harington asked me out but then I fell down and smacked my face on the pavement and had to go home instead. Sometimes our brains just try to sabotage even our fantasy lives, right?
Cebolamole 13
I can see how someone telling you how much you suck could be considered a sexy dream, though...
calebmeasner123 6
That would be terrifying
metalbass 6
That sounds like a semi good movie scene, no disrespect