Today, I was hanging out with my crush and wanted to see what he thought of me. Instead of asking him straight, I tugged at my shirt, saying ''I don't know why I wear this top. I always look awful in it." He said, "Are you fishing for a fat joke?" FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I sat next to my crush in class in a very loose, low-hanging shirt in the front (my mother had made me wear it, I didn't want to), and I felt so giddy because he kept staring at me in shock. No, not because I'm so beautiful, but because my boobs were hanging out. FML
Today, I was hanging out with my boyfriend. Everything seemed to be going well, when all of a sudden he turned to look at me with a pensive and thoughtful expression. I expected him to say something important, but instead he just said, "I was wondering, how does it feel to be fat?" FML
Today, I was walking on the beach when I saw my crush walking towards me. I was thinking about what I was going to do while playing with my top that ties in the front. I decided that I was just going to smile. When we got closer to each other, I smiled and waved, and as I put my hand up it untied my top. FML
Today, I tried to use a corny pickup line on my crush, but my mind blanked and instead of, "Did it hurt when you fell from heaven?" I blurted, "Did you fall?" He just stared at me and said, "What?" FML
Today, I was dressing in front of my boyfriend. He was looking at me in wonder and I assumed this was a good thing. Then he muttered, "God damn, you're awkwardly shaped." FML
Today, I went to the store in the most awful looking pyjamas possible, ran into my crush, and he looked at me up and down and laughed. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were out shopping. As he was trying on shirts, I told him that the particular shirt he was wearing looked ugly. He turned around, sighed, and said "You think? Well, your face is ugly, but you don't see me complaining about it." He was serious. FML
Today, I was wearing a new tank top that was really cute. I later was talking to an attractive guy and thought he was giggling at me because he thought I was being cute and funny. I then realized he was giggling at the fact that I'd only shaved one armpit. FML
Today, I finally told my crush I liked him. He smiled and said, “That’s sweet, but I thought you knew I was seeing someone.” I laughed awkwardly and said, “Of course, I was just joking!” Then I immediately tripped over my own bag while leaving. FML
Today, I asked my crush out for coffee but she wanted to go shopping. When she pulled me into the dressing room for my opinion on a bikini, I told her this was too fast for a first date. She looked at me in absolute horror. She thought I was gay, as in a harmless gay friend she could take shopping. FML
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Top comments
tj265 0
gotta be straight up with guys we dont catch hints easy lol
you_freak 7
That is the worst bout of hinting I have ever heard! As for the guy ... WIN!
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Comments (218)
hurray4jmk 1
YDI! dont fish for something when you arent ready for what you get. idiot.
cowboyy_fml 0
wat does "YDI" mean?
Maht_fml 0
you deserved it. and the op did deserve it.
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
YDI is you deserved it and YLS is your life sucks
FYLDeep 26
This guy didn't even know what "YDI" was. Why must you rattle his brain by throwing out "OP"?
cowboyy_fml 0
ya lol.
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
I'm not even sure what op means haha
cowboyy_fml 0
don't get sassy with me missy ok!
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Um actually I'm completely serious O____O
JacksonCampbell 9
YDI = You Deserved It YLS = Your Life Sucks OP = Original Poster They made UrbanDictionary.com for a reason...
yomamasmama 0
OP means the person that wrote this FML but idk what op stands for LOL
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
YDI... you had it coming.
cowboyy_fml 0
I wad kidding. take a joke gosh
cowboyy_fml 0
I also hate when girls brag about their boyfriend so pls don't:)
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
What are you talking about?
cowboyy_fml 0
ur profile says " I have the best boyfriend EVEEEEERRRRR"
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Why are you looking at my profile and telling me what to do? I have the right to say what I want on MY profile, thank you very much. Sweetie, go back to your neopets and Webkinz, because so far you don't know what a pedophile is or what YDI means... And I'm sorry you're just jealous because you don't have a boyfriend.
omghellokitty90 0
^most likely a pedophile just sayin'
omghellokitty90 0
fack' I missed :/ that was @ girl with the Kesha pic
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Me?
cowboyy_fml 0
actually I do and he's hot.but I don't go around braggging like some ppl do and I already knew what ydi meant I was just bein stupid.
cowboyy_fml 0
hey ur supposed to be on my side I just told her not to brag about her boyfriend lol I tell it straight up I don't care haha
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Well I'm not bragging I'm just doing some virtual PDA. I'm not going around saying, "Oh my god my boyfriend is so much hotter, sweeter, sexier, sportier, and more caring than all of yours combined!!!!!" I'm simply saying he's a great guy for me. Cow person thing, if you have a problem with it, then you can cry me a river, build a bridge, and GET OVER IT.
omghellokitty90 0
she stated she had a boyfriend what's wrong with that? you where the one creepin on her profile lol.
cowboyy_fml 0
I'm bot gonna cry over u. and I actually was first jokin around about this whole thing and ur taking it way to serious here.
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Well when you try and tell me what to do or what not to do, then I become a bitch. Too much for you to handle?
cowboyy_fml 0
omg I'm just jokin here with her and I knew what those things meant me and my friend were just jokin around and being stupid lol
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Well don't tell me what to do, don't be trollin' on my profile, and stop acting like an airhead and then the problem will be solved.
cowboyy_fml 0
ur not much for me to handle. if u were here in person trust me u would be the first one on the floor. I'm in girl wrestling. and lift weights 5 days if the week:)
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Okay the problem will be solved if you stop telling me what to do, stop creepin on my profile, and quit acting like an airhead...?
cowboyy_fml 0
u quit actin all tough and this is stupid were just sittin here fighting and we don't even know each other. and problem would be solved if u would also take some jokes
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Um sweetie, you couldn't win a fight against me even if I let you. And wasn't it you who just told me to stop bragging?
omghellokitty90 0
-__-; she probably lives in a different state.. and btw mussels don't look good on girls. they just don't.
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Exactly. Female bodybuilders are kinda... DISGUSTING...
cowboyy_fml 0
I guess I'll be the good one and apologize even though this is stupid
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
That's all I need. And I'm sorry for maybe overreacting a lil bit... it's just I hate it when people tell me what to do and what to say.
cowboyy_fml 0
ur not to much for me to handle and my mom is dying in the hospital so leave me alone
cowboyy_fml 0
and I'm just saying I probly could considering I'm like 145 pounds but o don't look discustingly muscled. I am nicely toned I don't let myself get nasty looking
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Oh wow. I just apologize an you make up some sob story? I don't care if you 'think' I'm not too much to handle.
ohthebloodygore 16
You bitches are annoying. SHUT THE HELL UP. You're also idiots.
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Don't call me a bitch. EVER.
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
Cowboyy: I don't care about this anymore. Just let it go.
cowboyy_fml 0
ya me either and it's true she haas cancer really bad:( it's sad:/
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
What kind of cancer?
ohthebloodygore 16
PM, bitches. There's a purpose for it.
cowboyy_fml 0
lung.
cowboyy_fml 0
lung cancer.and don't u just hate when other ppl try to get into other peoples fights? it's like they have no life
cowboyy_fml 0
and I'm sorry everyone for kinda fighting a little bit on this. please don't read it it's just stupid and it won't happen again
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
You're right. I do hate it...
MakaylaCommisso 0
that's just fake....I tell my friends when they look bad when they ask and I don't think they look as good as they could ..
CallMeHush 1
Honey, does this shirt make me look fat?
cowboyy_fml 0
ya sorry but it does ewwwww take it off
smr167 6
no, it's your ass that makes you look fat. -Chris Rock
yomamasmama 0
I honestly hate girls that complain about their look to get a compliment
ImaginaryFoe 1
Agreed. I also hate posts like these from said girls because it brings out the stupid generalisations. OP, you're an embarrassment to your gender. What could possibly have gone through your mind? Your approach was ridiculous since there was one right answer and a million wrong ones. YDI, YDI, YDI. Grow up or die lonely.
chillinAK 9
Okay OP, let me give you a small hint - if you have to fish for a compliment, then nine times out of ten it's gonna get you hurt with bluntness or its going to sound forced by some one who doesn't want a whiny chick on their hands. If he's digging you, then he'll tell you some thing nice all by himself. Fishing=not cool.
soldier4life_88 0
honestly!!! women need to just straight out ask us!! don't beat around the bush.. we just ain't that deep!! trust me if u just ask us straight up you'd save yourselves a lot of anger or embarrassment!! and if this offends any women on here I am sorry...
khidkrazey 0
ask em straight up!(:
SamSayzRAWRZ 0
YDI... you should have seen it coming.
cowboyy_fml 0
hey bestie