Today, I was getting everything ready for mine and my husband's first wedding anniversary. Flowers, check. Crisp new bed sheets, check. Silk underwear, check. Crippling cramps and an early period, check. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I woke up to realize I got my period a week early. The day of the after-wedding brunch. In a sort of remote area. Without pads or tampons. I need to be at the breakfast in a half-hour. FML
Today, it's the first evening that my husband and I will have without the kids in 8 months. We had been looking forward to it for ages, and my husband had even bought me some lovely new lingerie for the occasion. Guess what? I just got diarrhea. FML
Today, I started my period. I am getting married tomorrow. So, not only am I going to be on my period for my wedding night and honeymoon, my best friend has to help me change my pad because my dress is so big. FML
Today, I got my period. I was going to have my first threesome tomorrow. FML
Today, it's the first day of a long-needed vacation after weeks of stress and overtime. I'm having such intense period cramps, I'm bathed in sweat. FML
Today, I'm at the ER for my first ever UTI and potential other "down there" issues. Yesterday I got married. FML
Today, I woke up and my husband said he got me a gift for our one year anniversary and that it was on the table. We laid around cuddling and when I finally got up I was expecting to walk out to beautiful bouquet of flowers. I got two packs of cigarettes. FML
Today, I went all out for my husband on our anniversary. I planned meals, took him to a stage show, and got him a bottle of cologne he loves. He was moody, distant, and at one point crying. Why? He found out his ex-wife is getting married today and he couldn’t stop thinking about her. FML
Today, I had been looking forward to sex all day, got home, got my husband's engine running, got naked on top of him, violently sneezed at his new aftershave, and started my period all over his balls. We were centimetres away from sex and now have to wait 3 to 7 days. FML
Today, I was dead tired and just wanted sleep, so I jumped into bed the second the day's chores were done. Of fucking course, this was the day my fiancée decided to end our eight-week dry spell and came in wearing sexy lingerie. I couldn't stay hard due to exhaustion, and now she's been crying. FML
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Top comments
Rawrshi 25
Bloody hell.
hard_candy 25
pain relieving pills, check. postponed sexy time, check check check.
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Comments (109)
Goblin182 27
Buy red sheets.
skittyskatbrat 19
And this is why, unless you physically can't tolerate them, it's a very very good idea to start on the pill before your wedding. You can push the period back a few days and/or guarantee it's not going to be on your wedding day. Of course, no one realizes this until afterwards... which really sucks. FYL :(
xKai_Axelx 12
Guys don't realize how hard it is having our "amazing" bodies. -.-
MsKatieFace 11
What makes you think it's harder to be a girl? Guys have to be careful every time they sit down or they can squash their testicles which is far, far more painful than any period cramps, and they get random uncontrollable erections which are both embarrassing and can be uncomfortable depending how restrictive their clothing is, plus they get accused of being perverts etc. Considering we can take painkillers, various types of birth control and have a whole host of sanitary products to use, periods are far more controllable. I'd say it's actually harder to be a guy.
glabberfasted 16
77 - You clearly must have very light period symptoms.
syed121417 22
Please don't start with the whole "one sex has it harder than the other" arguement because it's very stupid. Both sexes have very heavy struggles, it's just different struggles. Neither have it better or worse. Also, I agree with #91. If you think period cramps can't be that bad, try my period for a week.
danilynn6308 14
I've heard of lemon juice stopping periods! Maybe try that..? Or at least they lighten them. Sorry about your luck, OP.
Pauschinator 22
Anal.
quoted 4
Hate to say it, but your username is false. Nothing is better than Hodor. Nothing.
demonfacee 14
Nice timing. **** periods, and cramps too.
boobear511 15
I feel your pain ?
worldclassrager 41
Wait a few weeks I guess...but sorry OP
hogwired08 2
While I don't understand the pain of that time of the month, I understand the irritation of it showing up early on your 1 year anniversary. This happened to my wife in October.