Today, I was enjoying a romantic cuddle on the couch with my boyfriend, when he suddenly decided to lift up my shirt, stick his face into my boobs, and go all Darth Vader on me. This included heavy breathing and phrases such as, "Amber... I am your boyfriend." FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I hung out with my boyfriend for the first time in two weeks. We were cuddling on the couch when he suddenly stands up. I thought he was going to hug me, but then he turned around, pinned my shoulders back so I couldn't move, and farted in my face. FML
Today, while my boyfriend and I were in the shower, we began to get a bit frisky. That was until I lifted my arms and he immediately made one of his "Chewbacca Calls." He was referring to my armpits that I had forgotten to shave. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were getting heated. We were having a lot of fun until I decided I wanted to be on top. He instantly got soft. FML
Today, I was cuddling my boyfriend before going to bed. He farted really loud and spat in my face as he laughed. FML
Today, I felt frisky, so I went over to my boyfriend's place, hoping to have some fun. I brought over a movie, and part-way through it, I started feeling him up. He responded by sighing, "That's really fucking annoying, babe. Cut it out, yeah?" FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were lying in bed together, and I was in a snuggly mood. I rolled over to gaze lovingly into his eyes and whisper sweet nothings to him in the darkness. His response? "Dear God! Did somebody fart in your mouth?!" FML
Today, I was cuddling with my boyfriend and told him how smitten I was with him. He responded by giving me a wedgie. FML
Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML
Today, I was taking a shower. I heard my boyfriend come into the bathroom, brush his teeth and take off his clothes. He joined me in the shower and instead of doing something loving or sexy, he let out a huge fart into his hand and threw it into my face. FML
Today, I was being a little playful with my boyfriend when we began wrestling. He then put me in a choking headlock and wouldn't let me out until I "tapped out". FML
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Top comments
4rmMiami 4
May the force be with you
SkoomaKi 28
The horniness is strong with this one.
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Comments (128)
4rmMiami 4
May the force be with you
HowAreYouToday 34
OP, At least he didn't say he was your father...
ebonyirony 29
11, you're still on the first page, why not leave a comment without it being a reply?
HowAreYouToday 34
Oh you're right :D silly me.
MelTheGreat 23
And your boobs.
BIGBOY4rmAHM 19
Motorboat you, he did!
TBelle4Ever 15
The breasts are large in this one!
ntd309 14
Did he take out his light saber too?
JFurr 9
11-I have never once seem you actually reply to something. I'm not one to shout, "threat jacker" but at least make an attempt to look like you're trying to tie something in to your reply. Otherwise, it looks like you're just trying to be seen and thumbed.
LiyIa_fml 8
In my opinion OPs boyfriend sounds awesome!
ridermntn 0
kkkk
lazyfoo92 4
idiots you are.
evilplatypus 39
76 - I'd like to point out that he isn't "trying", he's "succeeding". Don't worry; I hate thread jackets, too.
thescootles 6
Sry that sucks OP
SkoomaKi 28
I'm sry too. Leik if u cry evrytime.
Grimmerie 31
I luv yur coment ... 5eva.
flutter4 7
It doesn't suck. It only shows that her boyfriend has a good personality.
thejewishfuhrer 17
2 Your spelling sucks. I feel sry for you.
SkoomaKi 28
The horniness is strong with this one.
dashizam 10
Yeah, and what's the dark side? *ba dum tss*
Kefka91 15
92- Silly Dashizam, rim shots are for funny jokes.
FrostHeart 36
May the force help you...
ebonyirony 29
As long as your name is Amber, laugh along.
Awahso 25
Unrelated to the FML, but your picture made my day.
TRUFREEDOM 1
Go
XtraEzeee 8
You must have had one terrible day then.
MindFreakazoid 10
I like your boyfriend :3
midoridoll 3
THERE AIN'T NO PARTY LIKE A PEWDIEPIE PARTY.
MindFreakazoid 10
25 - You know it, my bro!
Warden1986 16
At least he didn't call you Luke and say he's your father. Then that would be really weird.
jetsown08 21
It's better than speaking like Yoda and saying "Suck you ****, I shall", don't you think?
kaikai234 4
Epic
Llamacod 11
wouldn't it be "suck your ****, I shall"?
ambear26 14
Lol 72- your picture is amazing!
purplebumblebee 2
And 103- your picture sucks
xJackson 1
The emperor will never approve of this! Contact him immediately!
Archay 13
I thought " shirt " was " skirt " for a moment, scarring image.
thatonename 7
Especially if there was an echo...
mrshutcherson123 3
Haha I did to!