Today, I was diagnosed with pneumonia. My breathing is short and heavy, and I wanted my boyfriend to comfort me. Instead, he called me Darth Vader, patted me on the head, and said, "Don't worry, the Force will be with you." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was enjoying a romantic cuddle on the couch with my boyfriend, when he suddenly decided to lift up my shirt, stick his face into my boobs, and go all Darth Vader on me. This included heavy breathing and phrases such as, "Amber... I am your boyfriend." FML
Today, I had an asthma attack while in bed with my boyfriend. He interrupted my desperate coughing only to tell me to shut up. He then rolled over to go back to sleep. FML
Today, I went to the doctor after being sick for weeks. I found out that I had bronchitis that then progressed to pneumonia. My girlfriend is hearing impaired, and when I can finally get words to come out when I speak, she can't understand them. I'm not sure who I feel more sorry for. FML
Today, I woke up on my boyfriend's bedroom floor. When I asked him why I was there, he said I'd gotten too hot, so he rolled me off his bed. I have the flu and a fever. FML
Today, my boyfriend endearingly told me that he's been taking advantage of my inability to smell due to a head cold, and he's been farting around me whenever he pleases. FML
Today, I got the flu. Feeling really sick and depressed, I called my boyfriend to get some comfort. When he didn't answer his phone, I called his house, only to hear his mother telling me, "He was so sad that you guys broke up." I didn't know. FML
Today, my fiancé called and hung up right after I answered. He called back 5 minutes later demanding to know the name of the man who answered my phone. This "man" was me. I have bronchitis. Yes, he's aware of this. FML
Today, my boyfriend made me breakfast because I had a cold. Because my nose was so stuffed, I couldn't tell that our milk had gone bad. I had two cups. And now I'm stuck on the toilet. FML
Today, I woke up feeling like shit after I had spent the whole night taking care of my sick boyfriend. He got up early, feeling great, bouncing around the house. When I finally got up I told him I didn't feel well and he yelled at me for being a bitch in the morning that slows him down. FML
Today, after recovering from pneumonia and a severe asthma attack caused by my dad's fiancée's cat, he chose to keep the cat. I can't go to his house without having to go to the hospital later. FML
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Top comments
Pleonasm 36
"Anakin, you're breaking my heart!"
Rommel1942 9
If that isn't love I don't know what is xD.
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Comments (138)
BrewCityMatt 5
Your boyfriend is fricken awesome, I almost laughed myself silly reading this
redneck66610 1
I'm sry u have that god awful sickness my gf did that to me the other week and all I could do was cough and laugh for hours
hewro_failure 11
That's nothing to say FML about, your boyfriend sounds awesome haha.
Techtacular 0
He's being funny. Quit whining.
fallenangel72 7
Awwwwww how cute
kuhyto 5
You sound like its a bad thing?
lol70720 5
People saying this is funny? Pneumonia is something serious and its painful. When some guy makes a nerdy joke, everyone laughs, but when some other guy also makes a joke with his Girl friend, the whole webpage gets spam by " He is a douche!!!" "You should leave him!!!"
elm1 6
I understand being sick, but that is AMAZING, like how is this a bad thing? he's trying to make you smile. appreciate it.
dreamingofawhite 2
This must be a common theme among the loved ones of sick people. When my daughter was 4, she had pneumonia. I took a picture of her wearing her respirator face mask and posted it on facebook with the caption "Luke, I am your father." Hilarious!
Relenaz 9
Eh.... he sounds a bit immature, but it doesn't sound like he genuinely wanted to make you feel like crap. Maybe in his own clumsy way he was aiming for the distracting your pain with humor tactic? Immature guys are not for everyone, but they have their sweet moments, if you are patient enough to keep them around. :P