Today, I was cuddling my girlfriend. The TV was on behind me, with some kind of girl's basketball game playing. When I stared into my girlfriend's eyes, she accused me of trying to check out the girls by looking at their reflection in her eyes. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Today, my girlfriend tried to cover my eyes while I was driving on the main street, all because she caught me looking at an ad featuring bikini-clad girls on the bus ahead of our car. FML
Disinterested
Today, while making out with my boyfriend, I slightly opened my eyes during it and saw him with his eyes wide open, watching TV. FML
Dumbass
Today, I was wearing my new sunglasses while watching a basketball game. A pretty hot looking girl was sitting a few spots next to me so I stared at her breasts. A few minutes later, I looked up at her face and she was looking at me in disgust. It turns out that my sunglasses were see through. FML
Today, my girlfriend berated me for my "lack of communication skills", all while deeply engrossed with something on her phone. FML
Today, while I was cuddling with my girlfriend, she looked at me and leaned in. Thinking she was going to kiss me, I leaned too. Just as we were about to kiss, she screamed "COW KISSES" and somehow managed to lick my eyeball. FML
Time for a change
Today, I was in bed with my girlfriend and she asked to see my phone to check my Snapchat to see what was in there. After she was done with it, she start looking into her phone to see her memories and started crying over her ex-boyfriend. FML
Priorities
Today, I wanted to spend some time with my girl, but she was more interested in her phone and 90 Day Fiancé. Bored, I went to play video games. Ten minutes later, she came looking for me and yelled that I clearly prefer video games to her. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I went to a basketball game. A very pretty woman sat next to him. During the third quarter, the kiss cam came on. But it didn't show him and me, it showed him and the other girl. And they kissed. FML
Loveshack
Today, my girlfriends and I had planned a movie night. When she got home, she took her laptop and some snacks we prepared, and spent the evening playing online games. When I asked if I should wait for her, she told me to go and "watch some shit on Netflix, I don't really care" without looking away from the laptop. FML
Today, I was in a nightclub with my girlfriend when a beautiful woman looked at me in the most provocative way. I didn't want to upset my girlfriend, so I escaped to the bar. When I came back, I saw the same girl making out with my girlfriend. Maybe I wasn't the one she was looking at. FML
Top comments
PharmacyJoe 13
"No dear. I'm just trying to see deep enough into your soul to know if you're worthy enough for sacrifice to the Dark Lord."
BaDumTsss_fml 23
Wow, paranoid much?
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Comments (114)
TheInquisitor 3
There is probably something seriously wrong here. I honestly would reccomend breaking up. My girlfriend once got all suspicious of me around other girls and she ended up CREEPY obsessively attached to me. Telling me she loved me 100+ times a day and whining if I didn't say it back even once, constantly asking if I was REALLY SURE I loved her, getting very upset if I did so much as use the toilet without text messaging her ETC
tranced_ 45
whoa whoa whoa guys!! she might have big eyes! just sayin.
kurodansei 16
he dating an anime character!? aint no eyes that damn big. lol
speakfreely 21
Crazy girlfriends be like
nxkki21 11
That's what happened in Modern Family :D
vrax 14
Man. A little much imo... Thatd ruin the moment for me
Tannasgh 22
Run...fast and far, don't look back and don't lose your footing...
okreallynow 5
Get out now
qtbabe127 22
If that's a sign of what's to come, get out now dude. Now. Crazy doesn't just go away, you gotta run from it!
measishouldbe 17
What i dont understand is the fact that youre facing away from the tv while cuddling
teentee401 37
WOW. You really can't win with some girls...