Today, I was camping with my family, and had to share a tent with my 13 year old brother. During the night he had to pee, but instead of going outside to use the bathroom, he zipped open a section of the tent, stuck his knob through it, and peed all over my shoes that were drying outside. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, my younger sister and I were camping when, during the middle of the night, she asked me if I could take her to the toilets as she was scared. I told her to go by herself or go behind the tent. Thirty seconds later, she peed on me. FML
Today, I tried to take a piss in the woods, but ended up peeing all over my feet. I still had to hike another five hours in wet shoes. My boyfriend's only comment was, "At least you didn't wet your pants." FML
Close quarters
Today, I took my 5-year-old nephew camping. I was about to take him to the outhouse for a bathroom break when he flung the door of the camper open and shouted at the top of his lungs to the entire campground, "We are going to poop now!" FML
Today, I woke up because of a weird noise. Scared, I turned on my bedside lamp. I saw my older, 17-year-old brother peeing in my bedroom doorway. He was hoping I'd step in it in the morning. FML
Run run run!
Today, I went camping with my family. While I was using the shower house, my sister decided it'd be hilarious to run off with my clothes and towel. I ran back to the camper, completely naked, only for my parents to bitch me out for streaking. FML
The call of the wild
Today, I went camping with my boyfriend. We were sleeping on a small slope. He got so drunk he peed in his sleep. I was downhill. FML
Close call
Today, I woke up and realized I had to pee sooo bad. The problem was, I sleep naked with my partner, who lives with one of their sisters. I didn't have time to get dressed before running to a shared bathroom, and even then I "drizzled" a little bit on the bathroom floor. I cleaned it and myself up but still… FML
Shitty
Today, I woke up at my brother-in-law's house in the middle of the night to discover I had a watery shit in my underwear. I thought I was safe because had on a Depends, I wasn’t and had to change my sweatpants too. FML
Today, I went on my afternoon stroll to my local park. As I reached the park a little boy was peeing in the bushes nearby. His mother called. As I walked by, he turned, still peeing, right to me. He ended up peeing on the front of my pants and on my shoes. My house is two miles away from the park. FML
Today, my 10-year-old brother got the bright idea to urinate in my oven to cool it off. My whole house smells like burnt piss. FML
Top comments
bribearr 6
He was marking his territory. It's sanitary. :)
TripOnShoelaces 0
Your shoes must be pissed.
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Comments (103)
luke8113 0
1st :) thumb down please
slushpup9696 12
Delighted to.
dc295 3
second?
bribearr 6
He was marking his territory. It's sanitary. :)
Iamnotmyself 17
-3 If Bear Gryllls can drink it, you can wear it.
luke8113 0
i was first they removed my comment :(
luke8113 0
i was first they removed my comment :(
bribearr 6
#17, Cool story bro.
HowAreYouToday 34
Where are comments one and two? They seem to have been misplaced... Do you guys know where to find them? ?*:.?. o(???)o .?.:*?
ktateprado 0
^ probably up your ass.
HowAreYouToday 34
You would know. (o_-)
ktateprado 0
I would.
enonymous 9
If anyone's going to be up anyone's ass it's going to be me
Iamnotmyself 17
-31 I want to join, I brought a *****.
boatingboy1011 0
20, 26- i thumbed your comments down just because of the stupid faces. Am i the only one who thinks they r extremely annoying?
bribearr 6
I do. especially since they had abslutely nothing to do with my comment.
Jennyboo5797 4
He peed in your shoes? Hmm.. Seems like the only logical thing to do now is piss in his mouth while he sleeps. >:D
Drigr 9
am I the only one moldy disturbed by the fact that OP referred to her brothers penis as his knob?
juicedboi 7
-38 Remind me never to piss in your shoes
MerrikBarbarian 9
eh, it's an English term. not that odd
HowAreYouToday 34
34- I hate you now, but since this is the Internet and I can't slap you in person, (^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^)(^-^) Pwnage!!!
sparklecherry 4
Lol, 72. Lol!
HomeAl0ne 20
Did he sniff your ass first? Because I'm starting to see a trend here...
HomeAl0ne 20
Did he sniff your ass first? Because I'm starting to see a trend here...
bhawks8188 0
No harm done if they still dry by morning
WiderWille 11
38 thats a great idea, maybe it turns him on so OP can write another FML about her brother :)
kings1fan 6
Be happy he wasn't taking a shit! Like the dog oops I mean ladies husband!
bthomas0319 2
What the heck are you talking about..
HowAreYouToday 34
That's a reference to an old fml
yoursucklives 36
i'd have totally done the same if i was a boy
bellakaykid 6
My brother has literally done this multiple times when I have gone camping. I shit you not.
arirsmommy 0
never leave your shoes outside the tent... camping 101
xJudii 5
Shoes were drying from the last time he pee'd on them ? ;p
lief835 1
You leave your shoes outside the tent for a reason
DelilahLoyla 1
Ewwwww eeewwww.... So not kosher.
hamguin48 2
Guess ur shoes aren't gonna be dry then
danielreader22 4
Damn, how'd you figure that out so fast?
brianfantana32 10
He learned it in physics class
tsim_fml 0
quite the brother.
enonymous 9
Stop complaining. I pay good money and sometimes phone R Kelly to get some quality piss
Iamnotmyself 17
I know, the taxes on piss these days are UNBELIEVABLE.
enonymous 9
I know Thank God R Kelly has a delivery service.
Iamnotmyself 17
-36 God bless 'Merica, where good honest god-fearin' rednecks as myself (think about my name, you'll be mindfucked) can purchase good, legal, piss.
TripOnShoelaces 0
Your shoes must be pissed.
bribearr 6
I LOVE BEAR! He's so amazing.
TripOnShoelaces 0
Agreed, but this was more of a mere pun, not exactly a reference. But good eye!
airforce987 20
it's hot out. Better drink my own pee! I think thats the reference your looking for
Youdrongo 0
Nothing says hydration like piss!
bribearr 6
haha my comment here is actually to my comment as 3, not here. it just decided to go here. but yes, that is the reference!:)
JrRacer4007 0
Omfg! I have to use this!!!