Today, I was baby sitting ten year old twins. When they first saw me, they ran away screaming and hid in the closet. This isn't the first house where this has happened. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I babysat my neighbour's spoilt bratty twins. When I told them it was their bed time, they pushed me over. One then started smashing me with a plastic sword, and as I lay helpless on the floor the other one peed on me. I got owned by two five year olds. FML
Today, I was babysitting my 4 year-old twin brothers yet again. I began to get desperate when they took my phone and would start crying every time I tried to take it back. My mother found me thirty minutes later, huddled in a corner, crying. I'm 27 years-old. FML
Today, I babysat a 10 year old from hell. She kept insulting me, saying I have tiny boobs, that boys must hate me, and that I'm ugly. I eventually got fed up and put her to bed. When her parents came back, she ran out of her room in tears and told them I'd beaten her. They believed it. FML
Today, two children decided it would be fun to try to ding-dong-ditch me. I never answered the door as I saw them running away. They did it a couple of times before getting bored. That's when they decided it would be fun to come into my house instead. FML
Today, I had to babysit two kids. It all went well until one of them duct taped a knife to a toy machine gun, lit the barbecue on fire, and ran around like a wild banshee screaming obscenities. The other one got scared and climbed onto the roof of the house. FML
Today, I was babysitting, and after the kids fell asleep I started hiding the Easter candy. They woke up when I was half-done, and it didn't take them long to figure out what was going on. They won't stop crying, and every time I go near them, they scream "LIAR!" FML
Today, I'm babysitting. The kids have only been home at the same time together for 15 minutes. Two of them have punched each other and the other is running in circles screaming. What is wrong with this picture? FML
Today, I had a babysitting job. When I got there, the parents were rushing out the door and told me they'd left instructions for the kids on the table. The first bullet point stated that the oldest was convinced she is possessed by the devil, but just to ignore it. Three more hours to go. FML
Today, my 4-year-old twin sons discovered how to lock doors. They locked me out of the house while I was taking out the trash. I had to climb through the kitchen window, which they'd generously smeared with peanut butter. FML
Today, I was shut in a boiling hot room with six children: a ten year-old who kept shouting; a belligerent seven year-old; two five year-olds who thought hitting me was funny, and two two year-olds who wouldn't stop crying. Their parents were just outside, laughing away, ignoring me. FML
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Top comments
swansung 0
So, you have a face for telemarketing... or cattle wrangling. Could be worse. Could be your kids.
lovin_darkness 0
Ok Micheal Meyers, little tip: Try taking off the slasher clothes, putting down the knife and being friendly; maybe say hello
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Comments (124)
mattmalin11 0
Well, when they come out of hiding, run away screaming hide under their bed, and apply scary clown makeup. Then, when they wake up, crawl out from under their bed, lean over them and say "PEEKABOO!!"
sowrightt 0
you'd make a good pedophile.
LordGoober 13
Is the academy taking new trainees? If so put me on the list.
brookie_bear 0
Well make the job easier on yourself, lock them in the closet. You dont deal with kids and they dont see your face. Its a win, win :)
kaengle 5
you must be very frightening to kids!!!
jonathan6773 5
Are you Shrek?
kaengle 5
haha good one!(:
NomOnShroomz 14
What can I say, kids love Narnia!
lifesabch 0
maybe get a new job. no one can be ugly...
rangerguy 0
you should come babysitt my kids :)
grass_hopperr 1
Maybe it's not because you're hideous, but cause you smell. Or maybe your voice is extremely high-pitched. Be open-minded about this!
NecroParade 3
So many delightful possibilities.
mikelovesbubes 0
you probably just look playful and they wanna play hide and seek
iWantSprite 12
or a mask