Today, I'm 19 years old and, having never been on a date, I agreed to let my friend set me up. He was adorable, young, with blond hair and blue eyes...and 4 years old. My friend tricked me into babysitting. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date. I've discussed the fact I like to date older men, but she thought it was clever to send a 63-year-old to my house to, "Netflix And Chill." FML
Today, I was babysitting a five year-old boy. Somehow the topic of relationships came up, and he asked me if I had a boyfriend. When I told him that I was single, he got all excited and asked if he could be my boyfriend. It would have been cute… except he was the first guy to ever ask me out. I'm 18. FML
Today, I had a blind date that my friend set me up for. My date was the ugliest, most disgusting person you will ever meet, but I thought that I would give him a chance. He saw me, eyed me up and down, then said to my friend, "You're kidding, right?" FML
Today, I'm 20 years-old and I was propositioned by a 42 year-old man, who turned out to be my dad's friend who helped care for me when I was 2 to 7 years-old. FML
Today, after being single for a while now, I unwillingly went on a blind date with a guy my friend convinced me would be perfect for me. He took me to McDonald's. His father was with him the whole entire time. He's 27. FML
Today, the three-year-old I was babysitting asked me where my boyfriend was. I told her he was at his house. I'm twenty and single. I lied to a three year old to make myself look less pathetic. FML
Today, I met and asked a cute girl out on a date. We decided to meet at a fancy restaurant downtown. When I got there I saw her sitting with what turned out to be her parents. They made a huge scene, calling me a pedophile and a low-life. Apparently, the girl was 16 years-old. I'm 25. FML
Today, I went on a blind date set up by my best friend. When I got there, my "date" was my ex. My best friend knew, and she thought it would be "funny" to see how we would react. FML
Today, my best friend set me up on a blind date with someone he said was very hot. I'm not exactly what you call fit, so I haven't been dating lately. As soon as I got to the restaurant, I spotted the girl. She looked me up and down, said, "You have GOT to be kidding me" and left. FML
Today, I learned that the guy I've had a crush on for almost 6 months at work is significantly younger than me. So young that I could have been his babysitter growing up. He's 21, I'm 34. FML
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Top comments
arkumx 3
if you get paid would that be prostitution?
flybye 0
At least he didn't try to pressure you into anything but playing with legos. Maybe on the next date you can take it to the next level: watching cartoons together!
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Comments (90)
arkumx 3
if you get paid would that be prostitution?
Ariasmake_1 0
win
wilcas713 0
yes.
Sportsfan86 3
true
mintcar 10
Taco.
instnt1nfction 17
and if you dont get paid, she would be a pedophile!
tacobird123 7
No 45, no :....
mintcar 10
Bird.
manMadeFAIL 7
haha the jokes on u
sarahskura 0
patheic all I gotta say
Zombies_Rule 0
what makes it even worse is that the fact that she lives in Arkansas, and I know her. HA! it's all to funny Nicole! fyl
angela3222 0
she lives in Alaska you idiot.
IHeartJimi02 0
It says Arkansas
Bubblerider 3
27 I KNOW you are lying! 58 stfu and read slower!
lacrossekid 0
that is such a good idea wow !
darkaqua3498 3
hahaha nice one. I should try doing that with my friend. :P
UpsidedownKayak 9
Is this one of the the same friends that took you out for your birthday and then made you pay for it?
supertacowaffle 41
Unlucky. Try match.com
TSSB 0
Did you score? :P
xXxDonovaanxXx 0
lmao!!!!!
percawesome 0
What I want to know is why a 19 year old is going on blind dates...
GiddyXD 0
^ WTF?
Vehicle 1
#10 Why WOULDN'T a 19 year old go on blind dates? I know people who have gotten married at that age.
mintcar 10
WTF? Why can't a 19 year old go on a blind date?
percawesome 0
oh LOL okay I guess it's more common than I thought. I'd always heard blind dates associated with desperation or something. I don't know, never been on one. My bad.
chosha_fml 27
The kid was probably nicer than most of the guys out there in the dating pool. Certainly nicer than your 'friend'.
zivlaks 0
The OP could easily be a homosexual man who got tricked into babysitting a young boy. The question is, is he catholic?
DocBastard 40
Haha! Right, because all Catholics are gay, and all gays are pedophiles. Good one, dipshit. Your lame attempt at humor failed worse than Ishtar and managed to insult a quarter of the world's population. Nicely done.
nathan5 0
A quarter of the world are pedophiles?? I did not no that.Haha
oliver86 8
14# just got owned
folgy 10
They are catholic dipshit
zivlaks 0
i just asked if they are catholic because i know a catholic in touch with God would find strength within their heart to forgive their friend and could easily have a great evening enjoying the comapany of an adorable 4yo. i dont see a reason for assuming he is a pedophile- i stated that the OP might be male merely because no one mentioned that possibility...
DocBastard 40
Zivlaks, you said OP could be gay, and then you asked if he's Catholic. There is nothing else you could have meant, so trying your feeble little "strength in god" defence is transparent and pathetic. So shut the hell up and stop trying to justify your stupid comment. You're just digging yourself deeper into the shit pile.
sadistmonkey 19
Just because he made a Catholic joke doesn't mean he literally meant that all Catholics are pedophiles. The prudence of his joke aside, your counterargument against that joke is rather weak.
DocBastard 40
Monkey, he didn't make a Catholic joke. Fortunately the comment is moderated now, so I won't repeat what the mods have already deemed offensive. I was not making any counter argument; rather, I just stated my displeasure in colorful language. So **** you for trying to sound smart.
sadistmonkey 19
Yeah he did. You even said above "your lame attempt at humor". A failed attempt at humor is still a joke, regardless of the quality of the joke. Maybe you're the one who should stop trying to sound smart. Not that it really matters since his comment was moderated.
SydneyCrosby 0
Doc just got owned. The best part is the fact that Monkey owned Doc without the use of insults or profanity, something Doc childishly attempted. Monkey, Respect.
SydneyCrosby 0
Penda, first of all I applauded monkey for not using insults and profanity against doc. I personally don't care about the joke, neither did I say anything about it. Secondly, I find it ironic that you insult my ability to grasp language yet you avoid my central idea and bring up something unrelated to what I said. You also redundantly mock my ability to grasp language by stating that I "fail" at it then saying the exact same thing at the end. Please, if you don't have a valid response to my comments, keep them to yourself. Also, restating your weak and irrelevant point does not make it any stronger.
SydneyCrosby 0
Oh, I'm very sorry I didn't realize you weren't speaking to me, please ignore by second point. It was rather mean as well, my apologies.