Today, my doctor confirmed that the extreme pain I've been experiencing is due to a kidney stone. My friend decided this was the time to tell me that passing a kidney stone is the male equivalent of child birth. Hello even more pain. FML

Today, I passed my kidney stone. After thirteen hours of pain free joy, another one appeared. FML

Surprise!

Today, I went in to the doctor's thinking I had a bladder infection. I walked out knowing I'm pregnant. FML

Yup, cool

Today, I had the pleasure of having a kidney stones removal procedure where they hammer your kidneys to break up the stones. Afterwards, the doctor called my wife over the intercom to come to back to the waiting room. She freaks out, runs back, and the doctor says, “I just wanted to show this stone. Cool huh?" FML

Today, I passed a kidney stone. This is the third one in two years. I'm only 23. FML

Today, I went to the hospital for wrenching pains in my abdomen. It turns out I have the largest "non removable" kidney stone my doctor has ever seen. It's the size of a fucking walnut. I have to pass the thing. FML

Clogged

Today, I ended up in the hospital for the fourth time since beginning of January due to kidney stones. FML

Yeetus

Today, I went to the doctor's office for a minor cold, and left with a diagnosis of pregnancy. FML

Today, I was passing a kidney stone. I had to go to the ER but had no one to take me, so I drove myself. They made me wait 3 hours because it was suspicious that someone in "so much pain" could drive. It was the largest stone that doctor had seen in his career. FML

Conflicting emotions

Today, I fell down some stairs and broke my ankle. At the hospital, a nurse asked how far along I was and boom, one ultrasound later, I’m actually pregnant. I had to then convince multiple doctors that I did not in fact throw myself down the stairs trying to cause miscarriage before they’d let me go home. FML