Today, I finally worked up the courage to talk to this hot guy in my law school contracts class. His response? "I'm no fashion expert, but I don't think you're supposed to wear purple underwear with white pants. Not that it matters, though, because your zipper is wide open." FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, it was my first day teaching economics to a university class of 150. For the first 5 minutes, a bunch of students snickered. I asked why. One said, "Your zipper's open, but it doesn't matter because your blue panties are showing through your white pants anyway." FML
Today, I went to a store to buy pants for a new job. A really hot guy helped me get a pair down from a high shelf so I could try them on. He had flirted with me so I hurried in the fitting room so I could go talk to him. Note to self: Check to see if you have pants on after trying on clothes. FML
Today, I tried to quietly tell my friend that our professor's pants' fly was down. Unfortunately, I underestimated how quiet the room would go. The entire class heard me whisper, “His dick’s gonna pop out!” The professor looked down, zipped up, and said, “Thank you, but… dream on.” FML
Today, I saw a hot guy at the laundromat. Wanting an excuse to talk to him, I tossed a pair of my red underwear into his washer. What I didn't realize was that he was washing his whites. Thanks to me, he now has an entire load of pink shirts and boxers. FML
Today, I went to the grocery store. I saw a very cute guy in the aisle and smiled. He smiled back and blushed a little. He walked over and I flirted with him. He said, "I thought you should know the zipper on your jeans is down" and walked away. It was. FML
Today, I gave a sexual harassment seminar, explaining how important it is to not do anything that makes coworkers uncomfortable. Someone joked, "Like telling you your fly is open?" I tried to zip up, but it got caught on my underwear. There were 20 minutes left in the program. FML
Today, I was substitute teaching a high school English class. A student discreetly told me that my zipper was open. I tried to zip it up, but the zipper got caught on my underwear. When I bent down to pick up my pen, my pants split. Before I turned around, I heard the sound of phones taking pictures. FML
Today, I went shopping. At the counter, the cashier started flirting with me and asked me for my number. He was cute, so I gave it to him. After walking out of the store, I got a text that said, "I didn't want to say it out loud, but your pants are unzipped." FML
Today, at work, our new cute intern asked me if I could explain my work. Taking a cool posture sitting on her desk I explained. After 10 minutes I walked away, only to hear her laughing with the girl next to her. Turns out my fly was open. And I didn't wear underwear. FML
Today, I gave a financial presentation to my entire firm. After it was over, somebody accidentally copied me on a group text that said, "Her zipper was open the whole time. If we're so successful, why is our CFO wearing a urine-stained store-brand K-Mart panties?" FML
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Top comments
lettertjes 0
YDI for, well, wearing purple underwear with white pants and not checking your zipper. And why does everyone on here need to 'finally work up courage' before talking to someone? I'm rather shy myself I don't need all my courage just to talk.
djaeb2001 3
fail
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Comments (76)
djaeb2001 3
fail
PurpleMonkeysFor 0
well atleast he was looking there... :D
Kimberly_Isabel 7
Purple undies. Now thats sexy.
Kimberly_Isabel 7
Purple Undies. Now that's sexy.
hackymeal 0
agree with 8:D
ruby84 1
stop repeating yourself, we get it; you want attention
cincin75 0
But u exactly showed what u want. Not so bad however. XD
andruha1123 5
only white goes under white pants or shirt... even I know that and I have no sense of style
authorkid 2
8 ikr that's what i was thinking
tj41567 0
LMFAO
lettertjes 0
#29 nah white also shows. Better use a colour that matches your skin colour.
andruha1123 5
white pants = cameltoe
jgilez 0
is it past labor day or is that memorial day?
matt1337c 0
Haha, your fly is down. Happens to the best of us. You don't DI.
momovanilla 0
that's so embarrassing :(
ohSNAPyall 27
Memorial Day, and no it isn't, that's in two weeks. But Easter is acceptable. You don't wear white after Labor Day because it's a light springy/summery color not a dark fall/wintry color.
jgilez 0
thanks for clearing that up
lettertjes 0
I like those US standards. Dutch labor day is may 1st and Dutch memorial day is may 4th, wich would mean that around here you can wear white all year long except for may 2nd and 3rd :D but actually, we just look at the weather when deciding what clothes to wear.
n_maher 0
oh thankyou #49 I always wondered what that American phrase ment. makes sense. but yeah op, white is fail.
Eyeliner_fml 0
indeed xD
vdk4601 0
ultimate fail
seanreddog 4
Hes gonna make a good lawyer.
KiddNYC1O 22
is he queer? that's hott
Radi0Waves 0
FYL for being a 1L... worst year of my life.
buddybudda 0
haha, then you should of kicked him in the nuts. solves girls everyday problems
morphinex 0
nothing wrong with wearing colourful undergarments with White clothes!! let's just hope that your purple undies were cute;£
Stoic1 0
I hate to break it to you OP. Your crush is gay.
cincin75 0
iamnotawhore69 0
i agree with #68, when all else fails a good kick in the nutz can make any situation worth laughing bout.....SHROOMS!!!!!!!!!
iamnotawhore69 0
stoic 1 how is he gay? I swear to baby Jesus that anyone would notice purple underwear hangin outta white pants, unless your a pervert who would just sit and stare I'm preetty sure any NORMAL person wouldve said something bout it to her
HeretoBlame 3
I agree
buddybudda 0
well of course imnotawhore69 would notice he sucks **** for a living. and secretly is a pervert. >.>
Rhaknam 0
@ohhaiitsme you will learn the answer to that question when you are older.
GinandJenkem 0
Slick guy.
stopwhining 1
Actually, white shows under white. Wear nude-colored things underneath.
seanders 10
YDI for being a *****
amd3lky 0
#12 how old are you
bookbee 2
29, you are a moron. Only flesh toned underwear goes under white, whatever tone your flesh happens to be. You knob.
killpro 0
white pants are hot
morjrocks 4
omg 8! that was my exact wording right before I clicked on it!!! haha ikr! :D
NatDancer2010 0
I believe 8 just repeated on accident. People need to stop being so hostile, your life isn't gonna end because someone messes up on fml and if it does then obviously you had no life to begin with. sry to rant but some people need to grow up
digitalcadenza 7
not even dude
pokerjedi 0
you must not be that hot because if any chick was hitting on me and was remotely good looking AND I can see her underware it'd be on like Donkey Kong, in like Flynt. (you guys are prob too young to get that)
atticuz 2
ydi for trying too little or too hard
muffduff101 0
i like this guy at least he was honest keep going after him OP
hippo23 0
well that's a nice way to say xyz
arkumx 3
Ydi. now you will remember to zip up after the restroom
ruby84 1
maybe she didn't use the restroom, just wore it and walked out without zipping it . just saying
El_patron 0
sounds like a fag lol. how would he know.., and so what I'll still check the girl out
Dr_Jalepenos 0
well um...... it's a girl.
Mischief109 11
^and girls don't unzip their pants?
ruby84 1
lol so what did u say?
Ducati4623 0
why have you replied to everything?
teresa_009 0
maybe he wanted to reply to everything.
kissMyAsss_fml 0
I'm not a genius, but wouldn't you typically take the username ruby as a girl? Haha, just thought it was strange that you said he. Kay, bye
EllOfficial 6
you're an embarassment to society
kissMyAsss_fml 0
Are you talking to me? It was a joke honey, get over yourself:D
lettertjes 0
YDI for, well, wearing purple underwear with white pants and not checking your zipper. And why does everyone on here need to 'finally work up courage' before talking to someone? I'm rather shy myself I don't need all my courage just to talk.
ruby84 1
cuz all the people on this site are loners; including you and I.
lettertjes 0
Oh right. I forgot I was on the internet.
hackymeal 0
but but but... but oh nvm
andruha1123 5
yeah, my life blows, that's why I'm here. it makes me feel a tiny bit better that someone else life sucks more that mine :)
ImaginaryFoe 1
I agree with brilliant bunny. Smart and purty. *sigh*
kissMyAsss_fml 0
Maybe she's more shy than you smartass. Op, this is why a smart man invented the thong. Or you can cowboy it. Either way works.
stary1722 6
Or just wear white underwear...
StoryOfTheYear 15
Purple? A Vikings fan? :o
jgilez 0
He sounds like a dick. A homosexual one
ruby84 1
umm noo, he sounds like a guy who's an ass. what? men can't notice unzipped pants unless they're gay, these days?
StoryOfTheYear 15
Hater-dar just went nuts *bee-beep-bee-beep*
LikeHell_ 6
haha thats funny. YDI
jbackway 0
hahaha
jvandy 0
what a douche. be nice about it and let the girl feel good in what she's wearin
vabeach94 0
exactly !!
stephanieeDawnx 0
Your hair is beautiful. :D JustSayinn' xD
brandiisawesome 6
Wow, you deserve it.
zombieteef 0
I laughed solely because you are such a retard :')