Anonymous
Australia
Today, I walked into two things. The first was a spiderweb. The second, due to blind panic, was oncoming traffic. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
buttercup92
San Antonio, United States
The passenger
Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML
spiderlady
United States
Tasty
Today, I walked face first into a near-invisible spiderweb. There's nothing worse than the feeling of a spider web wrapped around your face. Except maybe the feeling of the spider that saw my screaming mouth as a good hiding spot. FML
abigiggles
Today, a spider came down from its web in front of my face. This would have been fine and I could have killed it easily if I wasn't in my car. Driving on the highway. I cried. FML
pinkXpress1023
United Kingdom
Today, I had the opportunity to taste a live spider by walking into its web in the dark. FML
Anonymous
United Kingdom
Today, I walked through a spider's web with hundreds of baby spiders on it. My afro is now infested. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff
United States
Chance encounter
Today, my cat ran outside. As I ran around the side of my house to get her, I felt a gigantic spiderweb land on my face. I also felt a light thud on my eye and it started to tear up. I ran inside and looked in a mirror, the spider was in my eye. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, as I was walking through the park I had to yawn. In mid-yawn, with my mouth wide open, I walked right through a spider web getting both the spider and the prey it was eating stuck in my mouth. FML
ohmy
Canada
Today, a spider crawled across my glasses' lens. My first reaction was to smack myself in the face. FML
Anonymous
United States
Panic!
Today, I was driving when I saw a spider hanging from the ceiling of my car. I'm terrified of spiders, so I was watching it instead the road. When I looked back at the road, I had just enough time to swerve to miss the fire hydrant but not the tree. Even the cops laughed at me. FML
Man vs. Spider
United States
Today, my house was the only house left that still had its Christmas lights up, so I decided to take them down. Almost done, my fingers brushed over a spiderweb. Startled, I jumped off the ladder and broke my shoulder. Oh, and the spider still managed to stay on my hand, giving me a panic attack. FML
Top comments
markrs 0
The itsy bisty lady walked into the spider's web. Panic panic panic, now the lady's dead.
CTRL_ALT_DEFEAT 0
Don't worry if that's the case spiderman should be near
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Comments (90)
kharyll_1 0
Well, where you hit?
BarDownDaily 12
Where you hit? Da ****? And if they WERE hit, I'm sure it would have been mentioned.
teague95 16
6 - do you love saying "da ****" or what Ive seen you comment that a lot
Pelreskovich 11
Why da **** does it matter teague95!? ..lol.
greg84_fml 21
You know... in life there are a lot of things that warrant a "da ****" comment.
urdirtyolduncle 15
... And they said spider webs couldn't kill.
Bball_boy15 3
Da ****
teague95 16
56 - walking out in traffic can
CTRL_ALT_DEFEAT 0
Don't worry if that's the case spiderman should be near
So2011 4
I wonder where OP was that she got close to oncoming traffic.
infaith 5
best comment I heard in awhile! :)
Zomg_Okay 27
11 - The way I figured it, she was trying to cross the road and the spider web was hanging from the traffic lights or something.
SherBear133 7
Nah, like any other college student, his web-slinging ass is broke. Don't expect him to fly out just to save an idiot across the world. For that, you have superman.
tanneriscool 2
The fail train of comments...
neverdrinkSODA 12
don't you love the feeling of a spider web to the face?
karkid619 8
No.
ICaughtFire 4
Do you have a face #3? No one wants to see "your" abs.
Tsunami87 17
What's your opinion on abs with a face? Do people want to see that?
tanneriscool 2
My opinion on profile pictures is that I don't want to see some dudes shirtless body. This isn't a dating sight.. Just.... Quit.
DropTheDaggerxx 31
@71, this isn't a dating sight?! Man, somebody scent me hear to get a date. Looks like I'm a bit out of touch.
tanneriscool 2
I've never been scent anywhere... Maybe sent but definitely not scent.
djsamixin 3
#80 call me a word nazi, but scent and hear have to do with two of your 5 senses. Lol sent and here. Don't be mad, I just saved you two points on a spelling assignment.
DropTheDaggerxx 31
Neither of you caught that? Really? @83, read your first comment on this thread again and look really carefully and then read what I wrote. I was poking fun at your usage of sight over site. And @84, I was utilizing the senses you pointed out. You explained my joke for me, but didn't get it. Weird. Ah, forget it, I'll be more obvious next time.
thats_my_job 11
I got it off the bat and thought it was great. :)
markrs 0
The itsy bisty lady walked into the spider's web. Panic panic panic, now the lady's dead.
TeddyBearBabe 7
That was beautiful!
SkateboardGirl88 11
You know you sang-read it, hands down!
chacha2726 0
I loved that
matt98_fml 13
Pay more attention to your surroundings!! :) haha.
borkchop1992 15
I call fake dead people can't use computers
Idonebeenhad 17
Reminds me of that 'Hellen Keller vs traffic' joke.
iAmScrubs 19
It's okay. There's nothing like a little bit of Frogger to improve one's day.
perdix 31
I can see the spider sitting there saying, "Dayum! I didn't know it was going to work THAT well!"
DocBastard 40
I'm not sure what would stop traffic better - a pedestrian getting hit by a car or a panicking idiot running through the the street waving her hands above her head at an invisible spider.
TheFakeFamilyGuy 10
Holy shit iAmScrubs, Perdix, and Doc commenting together. illuminati