Today, I walked in on my parents necking in the living room. I promptly covered my eyes and muttered something about my innocence being stolen from me. My dad looked up from the couch, and mentioned that he had heard my innocence being stolen by Jake, my boyfriend from 2 years ago. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was in my bedroom with my boyfriend and we were kissing. My mom then came into my room and started shouting at my boyfriend for cheating on her. FML
Today, my little sister walked in on me and my boyfriend. I told her I would give her 10$ if she just pretended it never happened. She agreed, walked out and shut the door. Later, when my parents arrived, she yells: "Nicole and Joe were naked upstairs!" FML
Today, my boyfriend sneaked into my room, not knowing I wasn't home. It would have been great, except my dad went in my room to put laundry away. FML
Today, my boyfriend came over. My mom told him the story about the time she caught me having sex with my ex-boyfriend. My ex is his best friend. FML
Today, I was hooking up with my girlfriend when her dad knocked on the clear door that leads to the room. About 5 minutes later both of her parents came in to give us the "talk" which included the first time her parents did it. In detail. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I snuck into the bathroom together at his house for a quickie. Just as we unzipped our pants, his step-dad knocked on the door. Panicking, I jumped into the closet to hide. When his step-dad came in, he went to put some towels away. In the closet. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were visiting his parents. I'm nervous around them so he encouraged me to drink so I'd loosen up. I got so drunk I tore up all the things in his old room I thought were from ex-girlfriends and accidentally flashed his dad my crotch. FML
Today, I saw my girlfriend with an older guy who I thought was her dad, I went over to introduce myself. And then turned around and walked away very fast as I saw them make out. My girlfriend is cheating on me with someone as old as my dad. FML
Today, I went to see a movie with my parents. During a sex scene, my dad covered my eyes. I'm married and have 2 kids. FML
Today, my boyfriend and I were at dinner with his parents when he discreetly slid his hand up my skirt and tickled me. This caused me to kick his dad's recently broken leg. FML
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Top comments
shananigans 0
I'm probably the only freak who thought the most interesting part of this FML was the OP's use of the word necking. Oh and your dad wins.
24788 7
I don't know if I approve of you seeing this Jake guy in subject.
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Comments (109)
jillz 0
I agree with FPsLife and Reynard.
AmbrosiaFan 19
LMAO, what a comeback, dad! Loved his remark.
razorp 0
epic own dad.... just plain epic
PhillyFox 0
And you were dumb enough to have loud sex in your house while your parents were home. YDI.
TheOtherNewest1 6
+10 internets for papa.
spankos 1
win
Dingo_Face 0
Zing.
Fminetoo 0
YDI for being a **** block....
blastvortex 4
Pow! Who's your daddy!?
lemoncurry 0
Your dad is awesome.
Fminetoo 0
The first time i read this, i thought a guy wrote it and posted it, and now that its a woman, i kinda feel let down. : (