Today, I updated my Facebook status to "It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood." My cousin, seeing the status, failed to pick up on the sarcastic humor. She called all my family members and tell them that I was pregnant. Including my husband in Iraq. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. She hadn't even called me; I saw the news on my Facebook news feed. FML
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant and sent a picture of the positive test to my boyfriend. Before I got a text back from him, I saw his newly updated Facebook status, which read, "This has got to be the most depressing day of my life." FML
She's lost control
Today, I found out that my husband proposed to his girlfriend, and that her mom had posted it on Facebook. FML
Relieved
Today, a friend posted the Facebook status "Ahhh... relief." Trying to be funny, I replied "Why? Did you just poop?" A few hours later, I read her previous posts and found out her dad's in the hospital having heart surgery. Now everyone thinks I'm a heartless dick. FML
Happy days
Today, my girlfriend told me she's pregnant and I did not take it well. She had planned to record my happy reaction for Facebook; instead she got video of me bursting into tears, and trying to talk her into an emergency abortion. She sent it to my parents to punish me. FML
Today, my parents posted on Facebook that they were excited that my sister was pregnant and couldn't wait to be grandparents. Last week I told them that I, a 33-year-old happily married woman, was pregnant and they told me I was ruining my life and encouraged me to have an abortion. FML
Today, my attention-seeking sister-in-law came to my 20 week ultrasound and afterward, without my knowledge, took it upon herself to announce the gender to Facebook and call the entire family, telling them "we're having a boy" nullifying any need for the announcement I had spent 4 weeks planning. FML
Bad joke, dude!
Today, as a joke, I put a picture of a sonogram on my girlfriend's Facebook. Now her entire family hates me, and her mother has started the two-hour drive to come pull her out of college. Whoops. FML
Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML
Top comments
Daaniellee1234 8
I dont even see the sarcastic humor in this. What an asshole of a cousin aswell.
lettertjes 0
I don't see the humour either. Can someone explain the joke to me?
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Comments (108)
JERKKMONKEY 0
your cousin sucks!! FYL!
ForestFire0 1
I know! Does she hate you?
Dr_Haiku 0
Such a petty joke They saved Doctor Haiku's ass Thank you Plan B pills
RoxyRaccoon 4
Dr_Haiku, you are a god.
Dr_Haiku 0
Why thank you so much For that, when I end the world I will not smite you
AnaMaree 0
I will.
Technocidal 0
OP's cousin is probably just an idiot
Daaniellee1234 8
I dont even see the sarcastic humor in this. What an asshole of a cousin aswell.
girlygeek004 8
Have you never heard of Planned Parenthood?
NeatNit 33
I certainly haven't.
Gerenah 9
They do abortions. Usually people who get abortions did not plan on getting pregnant, so if they had not gotten the abortion, they would have become parents without planning to do so. I pray I never have to explain another joke.
mcsammo11 12
you live in Canada so I don't expect you to understand, if you were in the states you might understand
Konarika 11
How about you take your dumb patriotism somewhere else
Grumpy Jack 27
To mcsammy11 : I may be 13 years late but still. I remember that blonde girl from some game show years ago. She was asked a 3rd grade question which was : Budapest is the capital of what European country. When she was told the right answer, she said : ' "hungry" (Hungary), that's a country ?' Before that, she said she thought Europe was an entire country ! And yes, she was American !
hunter989 0
your cousin has problems if he didnt talk 2 u about it first
lettertjes 0
I don't see the humour either. Can someone explain the joke to me?
hennessey 0
I don't get it at all either. Please, someone explain.
caitlinftw 0
Usually the people going to planned parenthood are the people with unplanned pregnancies.
Taylor_tot 0
Planned parenthood is an organization that helps with reproductive health and stuff like that. You can get birth control and condoms there, and if need be, an abortion. However, many if not most people go there to get an abortion, because they aren't ready and the pregnancy was mistake. Therefore unplanned. My explanantion makes it sound boring, but its a kind of funny joke.
lettertjes 0
Ah, thank you :).
AtoZnumbersand_ 1
Planned parenthood is an organization that helps people with a lot of things, but it's the leading provider of abortions in the united states. That's the joke. Get it? It's not that difficult... Anyway, it's not really funny, it's sort of something i'd expect from a teenager. It seems like a pretty random thing to put on your status. Your cousin is pretty dense if she didn't understand the joke.
MusikBabie 0
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
If your cousin doesn't know there's an organization called Planned Parenthood then to her that sounds like You're pregnant. I didn't get the joke, and I've never heard of that organization until now. YDI for not think how it may come across. and if your cousin saw you running around with a guy making out she'd probably call your family because she's worried about you and your guy in Iraq. You'd probably do the same. and what she understood as "I'm broadcasting my accidental pregnancy" falls under the same category.
Owl1238 1
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
Most Americans are dumb... but we've got a few jewels in the rough!
Dannie1308 11
Because the facility is called Planned Parenthood, but everyone who seems to go there was not planning to get pregnant.
whatwasthatnoise 0
i see the sarcasm, and in all fairness..i always thought the same lol but FYL for having a cousin that would do that, seems odd
israelnotjacob 20
This does really suck and your cousin is stupid, but at the same time anyone should know that something like that on facebook is likely to be misconstrued by at least one idiot, and one idiot is all it takes, so be a little more sensible with your facebook statuses in the future, and you do deserve it to an extent.
lolsan 0
If you can't tell by the comments your joke flopped. Anyway, next time you go posting a joke like that, perhaps put an explanation with it?
AmeOwl 0
It's not like she was doing stand-up. It's a facebook status. Lots of people use their status' as forums for random mildly amusing thoughts.
chicken_lover 2
that's not really funny at all. i would have thought you were pregnant too. stop hating on planned parenthood, they give out free condoms! :)
mj2123 0
How is her comment "hating on planned parenthood"? She never said she had a problem with it - just that most people who go there for abortions didn't plan well...
GoddessDigi 12
#44 has it right. She probably just thought the name was ironic. I actually do, as well. I mean, c'mon, who uses Planned Parenthood often? Those that have UNplanned pregnancies. But I am all for what they do, just the name is funny.
thesunshotme 0
#38: Several things: "She went out of her way..." How is putting a status message on facebook, a private site, "out of the way"? It takes a couple seconds. "...to slam a health care organization" Aaaand HOW, again, does a three second facebook post qualify as a hate message? I'm totally with 12, 14, 32, 42, 44, and 47. Like them, I understood the joke to mean that "PLANNED parenthood" is actually a pretty ironic name, because many of its patrons are people who are there to do some damage control towards an UNPLANNED pregnancy. It's not hard to understand, and it's poking fun more at the organization's name than it's mission. To some, it's a (mildly, mildly, mildly) politically incorrect joke. It's not that hard to work out, really. "OP, you deserve it for being so damn careless..." Ok, people should feel comfortable with sharing their thoughts with their friends and family. This is clearly an FML because OP's cousin is both a jerk and a moron for making assumptions without checking with the OP. Normally, we can trust our friends and families (at least, the family members we like enough to add on facebook) not to be assholes that jump to conclusions. In any case, a cousin that goes through all the trouble of calling everyone the OP knows without confirming with the OP is either hateful, or completely retarded. "It's not that hard to connect something like that to "I'm pregnant,"..." Who the heck breaks the news of their pregnancy via facebook status message?! Seriously, it's the kind of news that's told over the phone or in person. Most certainly don't want to announce news of that importance over a silly status message. "...trashing something you clearly know nothing about..." Way to make assumptions.
chicken_lover 2
thank you, that's exactly what i meant. :)
chicken_lover 2
#61 was supposed to be a reply to pope.
Starfire22 5
Actually alot of people Write that they are pregnaut or engaged on thier facbooks! It's easier then calling everyone you know to tell them. I only call close people to tell them news like this, but I would tell everyone that I was pregnaut on my facebook. So I can see how the cousin could have made that mistake. Who actually thinks about different organizations on a daily basis? Most statuses I see on facebook have to do with how the person is or what they are doing.
Starfire22 5
But I do think that her cousin should have called the op before calling the rest of the family and the ops husband tho...
perstephane 4
Also: 1) That's a sick way to announce you're pregnaNt 2) If OP had been cheating on her husband in Iraq, why would she announce the pregnancy to everyone? 3) If she was planning on using Planned Parenthood's services, why would she go telling the world? People have random thoughts ALL THE TIME.
thesunshotme 0
#70. ^^this. Exactly.
bridgetoparadise 0
Whaaat. Is there a stick in your ass. Jesus.
12345678dance 0
@#71 Yes, exactly... the name makes perfect sense as it is
uglygurl 0
The condoms aren't actually free ever heard of taxes? Smh
FritoLovesYou 0
Wow, your cousin is a dumb bitch.
AtoZnumbersand_ 1
Sorry for being redundant, I pressed reply before there was already an explanation.