Today, I updated my Facebook status to "It should probably be called Unplanned Parenthood." My cousin, seeing the status, failed to pick up on the sarcastic humor. She called all my family members and tell them that I was pregnant. Including my husband in Iraq. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I received several texts congratulating me on my pregnancy. It turns out that my husband announced he is going to be a father on Facebook, which I don't use. I'm not pregnant. FML
Today, I found out my wife is pregnant. She hadn't even called me; I saw the news on my Facebook news feed. FML
Today, I found out that I'm pregnant and sent a picture of the positive test to my boyfriend. Before I got a text back from him, I saw his newly updated Facebook status, which read, "This has got to be the most depressing day of my life." FML
Today, I found out that my husband proposed to his girlfriend, and that her mom had posted it on Facebook. FML
Today, a friend posted the Facebook status "Ahhh... relief." Trying to be funny, I replied "Why? Did you just poop?" A few hours later, I read her previous posts and found out her dad's in the hospital having heart surgery. Now everyone thinks I'm a heartless dick. FML
Today, my girlfriend told me she's pregnant and I did not take it well. She had planned to record my happy reaction for Facebook; instead she got video of me bursting into tears, and trying to talk her into an emergency abortion. She sent it to my parents to punish me. FML
Today, my parents posted on Facebook that they were excited that my sister was pregnant and couldn't wait to be grandparents. Last week I told them that I, a 33-year-old happily married woman, was pregnant and they told me I was ruining my life and encouraged me to have an abortion. FML
Today, my attention-seeking sister-in-law came to my 20 week ultrasound and afterward, without my knowledge, took it upon herself to announce the gender to Facebook and call the entire family, telling them "we're having a boy" nullifying any need for the announcement I had spent 4 weeks planning. FML
Today, as a joke, I put a picture of a sonogram on my girlfriend's Facebook. Now her entire family hates me, and her mother has started the two-hour drive to come pull her out of college. Whoops. FML
Today, I guess I accidentally left Facebook open on my work computer while I went to the bathroom, because my boss updated my status to "Unemployed." FML
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Top comments
Daaniellee1234 8
I dont even see the sarcastic humor in this. What an asshole of a cousin aswell.
lettertjes 0
I don't see the humour either. Can someone explain the joke to me?
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Comments (108)
LilaBear 2
Your cousin sucks, yes. She shouldn't go around telling other people's news, even if it had been true. And she should have checked with you first to see if you really were pregnant. Even so, putting up a status like that is a slightly stupid idea... it does give the impression you might be pregnant. It does sound like a joke but people often use jokes like that to announce things when it comes to FB statuses.
polico_wolf 0
boo hoo, tell them you're not pregnant and life goes on.
Brooklynxman 0
Funny story about that, my fiance mentioned she was going there to me and I nearly had a stroke. She couldn't understand what was wrong until I asked why on Earth she was planning a pregnancy.
dancingdoggy 4
Usually, when people put something as their status, even if it's a joke, it has something to do with their current life. I hardly ever see statuses that have nothing to do with the writer's personal life. So I would have assumed that she was pregnant too.
starzchick 0
that's exactly what I was going to write.
sportsnut 0
YDI, there are so many ways to interpret that and its TEXT, there is no tone for humor with TEXT (unless you chose better words) so why are you so surprised?
Bloonbloon 0
After something sarcastic, I always add a little *sarcasm*, like Wow you're so smart! *sarcasm*
harleychicksme 0
There is no damn way she called your husband in Iraq.
Ninjaface 0
Your next status update should be another obscure joke, but about having a stupid cousin. That way, when your cousin comments asking you to explain the joke, you have her.
RaidenXS 0
sarcasm doesn't translate over the internet. ever. YDI
Comentator 0
and that is why Facebook SUCKS. Be more specif next time. Oh and punch your cousin in the face.