Today, I tried hallucinogenic mushrooms for the first time with my friend. Little did I know, they last for around 6 hours, and I had class at 3, when I had to give a presentation in front of 30 people. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
Today, I was at a party where I ate a bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML
Far out
Today, I got a call from my son’s teacher, saying that he raised his hand during a test to say he "couldn't focus, because the ‘metroids’ are harassing me.” Apparently, he forgot about the test and took a healthy dose of shrooms right before. FML
Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML
High times
Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML
Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML
Zzzzzzzz
Today, after a week of insomnia, I finally managed to fall asleep. Thirty minutes later, my friends decided to bang on my door, yelling at me to wake up and party with them. I'm now wide awake and hallucinating from lack of sleep. FML
Performance anxiety
Today, I had a presentation for my university class. The bus was 5 minutes late, and I ended up getting to class right on time. As I took a seat, my group was asked to present. I panicked and totally bombed my presentation. FML
Nature sucks
Today, my friends convinced me to go on a "short" hike. Little did I know, they're actually all avid hikers, whilst I'm more of an "indoor enthusiast." I've now been climbing a never-ending hill for hours, hallucinating about my cozy couch, and praying for a miracle to deliver pizza to the summit. FML
You laugh, you lose
Today, I gave a big presentation at work, hoping to impress my boss and angle for a promotion. I was already nervous, but a co-worker at the back kept making goofy faces, causing me to repeatedly break into laughter. My boss accused me of being high, and suspended me on the spot. FML
Today, I was giving a presentation to my college class. I've had a natural stutter my whole life, so I stuttered through the whole thing. My professor tried to hold in her laughter for 15 minutes. FML
Top comments
feelslikeanoose 0
How could you not know that mushrooms would last that long? And why on earth would you do ANY drug other than marijuana before a presentation?? Come-on people!
I_Hate_Tpyos 0
obviously you were hallucinating too much to read that he said it was his first time.
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (126)
fabulous_geek 0
YDI all the way retard.
AngryScotsman 0
"Why are all these caterpillars starin' at me?"
HMTQMadge 1
That's your own fault for being stupid enough to do drugs.
Pixon 0
You're an idiot.
happygoluckyhh 0
I hope you failed the presentation and was caught for doing drugs. You are a ******* idiot you bitch. Hope next time you do shrooms you commit sucide because you are worthless...and you know i,t because if you didn't know it, you wouldn't be doing that shit.
Sunnay 0
And I'm absolutely sure you've never tried anything in your entire life, or been curious about it at all, right? And I'm POSITIVE that you're the most perfect person in the world, and that everyone else needs to "commit suicide" for being "worthless", right? Get over yourself, you goddamn asshole. Really, now.
Jrbn 0
"I hope you failed the presentation and was caught for doing drugs. You are a ******* idiot you bitch." Do even know how to make a sentence? I don't even get how idiots can criticize others about doing drugs when they themselves can't even write a basic sentence.
Hannah_Lou 1
you're an aweful human being.
godhelpme92 0
Your and idiot for trying it in the first place
whoahanna 0
Here, I'll say this in terms you'll understand: git 0Ff yer stOopid, m0Ron!c a$s, git a fukn job, m00v3 out uhv yer p@r3nTs howse, put doWn da shr00mz aNnNnd kwit b!Ng suCh a dum *** nd @ werthl3$$ w@st3 uhv hewman exi$tance. YDI. End of story.
Tylerpwns666 0
i just gotta know one thing... how'd the presentation go?
Avenging_Angel 0
Drugs. YDI. Nuff said.
facepalmshroomer 0
Original poster. Actually the presentation went far better than I thought it would, the teacher didn't say a thing, and luckily many of the students in class commented on the piece (it was an art critique) in the allotted time- therefore leaving less time for me to make a possible ass of myself. Definitely hard to concentrate when the table in front of you is expanding though. And I like how there's a majority of people saying I'm an idiot AND a bitch. I'll admit, I should have researched before trying a hallucinogen, but come on. You do not know me (in all likelihood) so you don't know my character, so don't give me that morality crap about drugs (especially if you've never tried them.) Experimentation does not mean idiocy.
scott_m319 0
Morality is not really the issue with me, it was more the danger factor. I still give this a YDI, but that's because your body could have gotten seriously messed up. Not some dogmatic morality bull crap.