Today, I tried hallucinogenic mushrooms for the first time with my friend. Little did I know, they last for around 6 hours, and I had class at 3, when I had to give a presentation in front of 30 people. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I was at a party where I ate a bowl of disgusting snacks because I didn't want to drink on an empty stomach. I spent the next twelve hours trying to prevent the world from collapsing into millions of demonic shards, cause apparently that's what a large dose of magic mushrooms does. FML
Today, I got a call from my son’s teacher, saying that he raised his hand during a test to say he "couldn't focus, because the ‘metroids’ are harassing me.” Apparently, he forgot about the test and took a healthy dose of shrooms right before. FML
Today, my sister was on shrooms. I wasn't able to tackle her before she called the cops to say that her books were trying to eat her face off. FML
Today, I had to give a joint presentation at college. My partner was so high, she couldn't even pronounce her own name properly in her introduction. I'm pretty sure her antics are going to get us both failed hard. FML
Today, in the middle of a boring class, my friend offered me some Smarties. We're not allowed to eat in class, but I had a couple anyway. As I put them in my mouth, my "friend" stood up and yelled that I was doing ecstasy. I might actually get expelled. FML
Today, after a week of insomnia, I finally managed to fall asleep. Thirty minutes later, my friends decided to bang on my door, yelling at me to wake up and party with them. I'm now wide awake and hallucinating from lack of sleep. FML
Today, I had a presentation for my university class. The bus was 5 minutes late, and I ended up getting to class right on time. As I took a seat, my group was asked to present. I panicked and totally bombed my presentation. FML
Today, my friends convinced me to go on a "short" hike. Little did I know, they're actually all avid hikers, whilst I'm more of an "indoor enthusiast." I've now been climbing a never-ending hill for hours, hallucinating about my cozy couch, and praying for a miracle to deliver pizza to the summit. FML
Today, I gave a big presentation at work, hoping to impress my boss and angle for a promotion. I was already nervous, but a co-worker at the back kept making goofy faces, causing me to repeatedly break into laughter. My boss accused me of being high, and suspended me on the spot. FML
Today, I was giving a presentation to my college class. I've had a natural stutter my whole life, so I stuttered through the whole thing. My professor tried to hold in her laughter for 15 minutes. FML
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Top comments
feelslikeanoose 0
How could you not know that mushrooms would last that long? And why on earth would you do ANY drug other than marijuana before a presentation?? Come-on people!
I_Hate_Tpyos 0
obviously you were hallucinating too much to read that he said it was his first time.
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Comments (126)
cobrakid77678 0
you deserve this for doing drugs of any kind. you suicidal dumbass
mikeyformayor 0
People who do drugs aren't "suicidal", they're extracting the most happiness they can from this piece of shit we call life.
lolli_pops123 0
honestly, shrooms are really exciting and fun if you do it in the right time and place. and lady ashley, why the nastiness? it's, in reality, not your buisness to talk shit like that to somebody who's living their own lives. and sarahdarlin, ily. thank you.
lolli_pops123 0
oh ****. i'm still getting used to this website... i meant to put that comment on the bottom.. what i meant to say is: THANK YOU. people do shrooms, weed, x, etc to have some FUN. if you're doing some stupid shit like heroin, then yeah, you're gonna die. soon. and i'd guess that you're trying to die, knowing how HORRIBLE and ADDICTIVE it is. watch the movie The Boys and Girls' Guide to Getting down-- very informative on this subject.
MustacheChildren 0
Drugs are mainly deppresants and you end up chasing after your first 'high' because your body slowly builds up a tolerance for the drug. You end up addicted and depressed.
MixMastaKDizzle 12
No no no. I'm an avid drug user, and I find great joy in a hit of acid, bowl of weed, etc... It depends on the user if these drugs make you depressed.
somethingvague 0
How did it go? XD
FlickMyBean 0
Sounds kind of Hunter S. Thompson to me. He'd have done it intentionally though, with a full understanding of the consequences.
insomniac8400 13
He'd have done it because of the consequences lol
Corn_Is_Tasty 0
You're an idiot, at least mine is a better FML story, I was on shrooms and as I peaked my family called me, just to have a "nice" conversation.
hotdamn 0
Well let's just hope you didn't have to drive to that class also!
bhayes123 0
haha dude thats ****** awsome howd that presentation go down
girlgeorge_fml 0
probs shoulda thought a little about that... but hey, coulda been lsd. : ) and who the **** trips in february? not the time dude.
girlgeorge_fml 0
and to #40, how is eating shrooms being a suicidal dumbass? they give you a mild case of food poisoning. maybe youre a little not all there yourself?
effinAcotton 0
dude that was so stupid but fing hilarious. i tripped some boomers the first time and a little over an hour(aka when they start ******* you up) ran into my gf i was going to break up with. i broke up with her as i laughed and she cried. i hope your speak went better than that.
linzhart333 8
YOU'RE DUMB!!!