Today, I started talking to a friend about how he needs to stop overreacting and getting angry very easily. He kicked sand up in the air, and it came back into his eyes. He started getting angry, and when I told him this is what I was talking about, he hit me in the nose. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my boyfriend was telling me about accidentally punching his best friend in the face. As he was acting it out he ended up punching me and giving me a bloody nose. FML
Today, I was having a debate with my friend, who actually believes karma is real. He got very angry with me and stormed off, tripping over his own feet in the process. I laughed and asked what he'd done in a past life to deserve that one. He responded by getting up and punching me. FML
Today, I went hiking with my friend. We both had to pee really bad, so we went to the edge of a cliff to relieve ourselves. He peed and it came and hit me in the face. He did it on purpose, so I decided to get him back and peed at him. The wind changed direction and hit me in the face again. FML
Today, due to my short temper, I punched myself in the nose because I wouldn't stop sneezing. FML
Today, I tried to give my friend a fist bump. He thought I was trying to punch him so he punched me in the face. FML
Today, I decided to use my mentor's advice. I told her I had been having some trouble controlling my anger, she told me to throw rocks at trees. I threw a rock at a tree, very hard. It bounced back hit me above the eye. I'm still pissed as shit. FML
Today, I was walking down the street, when I saw a guy in front of me trip and fall forwards, and I quickly jumped forward to steady him. Apparently he thought he was being mugged, and threw his head backwards into my face, leaving my nose a bloody mess. FML
Today, I was in a big Skype chat, which somehow turned into a heated argument. My friend lost it, typed "your stupid" and called me a "looser." When I pointed out the irony of his messages, he rage-quit, drove all the way to my house, and punched me in the face at the door. FML
Today, I tried to put my friend's hand in lukewarm water while he was sleeping, to see if he'd pee himself. He woke up and punched me in the face. FML
Today, I was having lunch and I started throwing crumbs at my friend at the other table. Then I accidentally hit the kid next to him. He got really mad and came over and hit me in the shoulder with a brick. A brick. He just had a brick in his bag. FML
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Top comments
matrael 0
I hope you whooped his ass for that little douche move. You tried to be a friend and was nice about it and got sucker punched for your efforts. Douche bags like that need an ass kicking to help them realize how much of a little bitch they're acting like. Have fun
Jewelofagal 2
With friends like him, who needs enemies? Consider breaking off this "friendship" before he does more than hit you.
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Comments (69)
mikeymuscles112 0
Never tell someone who is bipolar to calm down just make sure they think that you think that they are right And then they wont hurt you
CLICKHEREx 0
Correction; EX FRIEND!
omghehehe 0
What!!! Knowing he had anger issues, it was brave of you to say it to his face.
muffinsareyummy 1
when i got to the part about the sand coming back into his eyes, i played the scene out in my head. five minutes later and i'm still laughing.
mylifeisfuckedd 0
hahahahah this made me LOL
thebabibunni 0
lol i dont really know why but this made me laugh haha
blastvortex 4
Haha. You seriously call this guy a friend? He sounds about a few pumpkins short of a full pie. Lose him.
woofis 0
LOL I'd advise you not to unfriend with this one unless you don't mind moving... Out of Country... In an armored truck... *shudders*
Jaguaress 2
Yeah if you don't break off the friendship immediately, consider yourself highly codependent and in need of help. lol
allie2590 31
Maybe he was trying to get some sand off your nose.