MikeNick
United States
Today, I somehow managed to slam my trumpet case closed on my nipple. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Tokyo, Japan
How? What?
Today, I managed to bruise my nipple by closing an umbrella on it. The stupidity of the whole thing hurts almost as much as the injury. FML
Display
Paris, France
Today, I injured myself in the geekiest way possible; I managed to crush my nipple while closing my laptop. FML
Eleanor
Leeds, United Kingdom
Slice of life
Today, I tripped and fell on my open dishwasher, right onto a carving knife. I'm mostly ok, except that my nipple has been sliced neatly in half. Seriously, the two halves keep flapping open like a little mouth. It would be funnier if it wasn't so painful. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I accidentally slammed a door on my own arm flab. FML
Anonymous
Colorado Springs, United States
Today, I shut one of my breasts in my car door. FML
Anonymous
Carly Rae Jepsen
Today, I was setting up a rat trap at the kitchen table and had just gotten it set when my phone rang. I foolishly leaned over to grab my phone, brushed against the trap, and it snapped closed on my nipple. I wasn’t wearing a bra so that thing grabbed my nipple hard and didn’t let go. FML
Anonymous
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
United States
Thwack
Today, in marching band, the guy in front of me backed up too far. As we turned, the back of his trombone hit mine, smashing it into my lip. I had to finish the song, all while sending blood down my horn. FML
anonymous
Ballwin, United States
Today, while shaving in the shower, my mother banged on the bathroom door to tell me something, right as I went to shave under my left armpit, causing me to jump and cut open my nipple. FML
Luna
Carmel, United States
Today, I found a tick half-buried in my nipple. FML
DroppedTheSoap
Brisbane, Australia
Today, while trying to sexily wash my man in the shower, I dropped the body wash bottle. The pump grazed my nipple, making it bleed. As if that didn't kill the mood, I now have a Star Wars bandaid on my boob. FML
Top comments
Jays7 10
That's what you get for playing the Trumpet. Nah I joke, FYL indeed
AmberL 0
Ouch! I'm trying to picture this happening, and when I do, I see droopy man boobs getting in the way.
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Comments (205)
Jays7 10
That's what you get for playing the Trumpet. Nah I joke, FYL indeed
slushpup9696 12
That blows. Am I doing this right? I'm not very good at making bad puns...
imustbeinsane 2
Couldve been a tuba
ScaughtieHolden 11
I hate 1's picture, it's not funny at all, There's plenty of white rappers and I'm 99% sure Eminem is NOT a cat.
Steve95401 49
Hey Einstein, can you demonstrate how dud you manage to do that?
Steve95401 49
* did *
athena143 0
Dude I was just about to comment the exact same thing lollolol
kooochris1995 14
# 24 I think every one know Eminem is not a cat...
emvictoria 9
Ouch, I could imagine how painful that was.
wajih 1
Nice hair fag
DioMaledica 14
I'm guessing no one else is thinking about family guy and the really long nipples.
Furytalon 14
Lol I do that all the time
margie2194 12
Sexually excited band geeks?
daniel1_1 13
I used to play the trumpet, then I took an arrow to the knee. Seriously, arrow to the knee jokes suck. Stop them.
Glidefedt 6
97, I used to play the trumpet, but then I took a trumpetcase to my nipple.
sassypenguinxox 15
Omg your display pic is hilarious!
rainbo955 0
Wtf. Eminen isn't a cat? who knew.
skorpien 1
92 - Is there any other kind?
SkrillexXD 6
Eminem is a candy, guys. Get it right.
MrShizzBear 0
This one time, at band camp...
TheDog6 24
Don't worry #146. I'll stand by your side and I Won't Back Down. First let me pass out the Lights before we get on the Fast Lane
TheDog6 24
Wow that failed let me try again. Don't worry #146. I'll stand by your side and I Won't Back Down. First let me pass out the Lighters before we get on the Fast Lane. Now I have Writer's Block.
tweetbaby14 18
35, it's called saggy boobs and playing in the nude.
Steve95401 49
#165 - thank you. I think you got it right.
tweetbaby14 18
You are very welcome, sir. Now about my fee...
Funnywayz 0
I was about to comment the same thing. :-0
Jakey00 0
haha band geek
bassoonist527 0
#150 wow. Haven't heard that one before. How original.
rodonz94 0
Must've been cold. (nipp weather)
CourtneyDanielle_fml 9
Ouch.
ultrabroski 0
Squirt!!
CourtneyDanielle_fml 9
Creep!!
IndigoAcrylic 9
At least he didn't close the case on his boner! That would have been sooo awkward ;D
CourtneyDanielle_fml 9
It's soo awkward that you would even say that..
Nesio213 4
Cute Bunny Mind If I Pet It;)
tylersign 11
Ok what the **** is wrong with the Internet?
gators1995 30
Everything is wrong with the internet
Icecream93 4
weren't you like wearing any clothes then xd?
Sicari 2
giving musical instruments a strip tease is apparently the new thing. OP just does it wrong
ohSNAPyall 27
Hey bro, sounds like you need a mansierre.
IndigoAcrylic 9
Playing the trumpet naked? Well why not? It's not a crime ;D
NuTrees 9
Why does he necessarily need clothes on? Our skin does need to breathe you know. You might as well carry on with life in the process. Plies it's better his nipple then his penis..
IndigoAcrylic 9
But uhh..penis is... More fun ^_^ JK! Maybe (;
kakaboom 0
please tell me you are a chick
Cathy_Nguyen 0
The name says "MikeNick."
kings1fan 6
Even with the name mikenick I was still hoping it was a chick!
xXxIracebethxXx 14
I'm sorry, but what the **** does being a chick have to do with ANYTHING? Seriously.
rexgar2000 10
chicks have bigger nipples and boobs so closing a case on a nipple seems more of a problem a girl would have. just saying.
cosmosis 12
Not necessarily 112. Op might have a huge set of man cans that some how managed to flop into the case as he closed it
Funnywayz 0
#112 I have to disagree :P
A100893 30
Were you shirtless? Strip teasing for your instrument I see...
MagicGiraffe 12
This one time at band camp...
JadeWalker 14
A guy strip teashing for his trumpet o.O
AmberL 0
Ouch! I'm trying to picture this happening, and when I do, I see droopy man boobs getting in the way.
SpeshulK 0
I feel bad for you just for having to picture droopy man boobs
ohSNAPyall 27
Nipslip!
lexex1 4
I bet the audience was enthused
Braginskyyy 6
Or maybe aroused. :|
Pentium_4 27
That's impressive. I mean, if you like to play the trumpet with no shirt on then more power to you
deviable 9
The nipples get so much abuse on this site. It must be because they look like tiny targets.
mismonroe 0
"Long titty, no nipple having' bitch!"
mismonroe 0
Tell me I'm not the only one in love with Kevin Hart. Douches.
iliketurdles 7
Nope. He's pretty funny.
dontfmlplzzz 6
Ohhhh he said she don't have no nipples!!
clcbjj31 0
PP
Nesio213 4
Nah He's Pretty Dope... I Thumbs Up'd It ;)
tweetbaby14 18
153, do you have an eye problem or are you just a creep?
TalkingMuffin 3
"It's about to go down."