Today, I showed the kids I was babysitting a picture of my daughter, and the little girl asked, "You have a baby in your belly?" I said, "No, she's not in my belly anymore," and the little girl replied, "But it's BIG," and patted my stomach. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I told my daughter that she's going to be a big sister, because there is a baby growing in my tummy. She's been sobbing because I can't convince her that I didn't eat a baby. FML
Today, I was babysitting a three-year-old. She asked me what was wrong with my belly. I had to explain to her that I'm just fat. Twice. FML
Today, I was babysitting a little girl, and we were playing with dolls. After we fed her babies, we put them down for a nap. After a few minutes, I asked if they'd had enough sleep. She looked at me like I was a freak and said, "Uh, they're not real babies, you know…" FML
Today, I was babysitting a little girl down the street. She pulled out her 'memory box', which contained many childhood treasures. After pulling out a variety of dresses and baby pictures, she says, "... and here's my belly button!" and plops an umbilical chord in my hands. FML
Today, at school, one of my students confidently told me that I "wasn't hiding my baby bump very well anymore." I'm not pregnant. Just fat, apparently. FML
Today, while on the bus, a small child asked me if I was having a baby, and I replied "Yes." I'm not. I was just too ashamed to admit I was fat. FML
Today, my son was looking through old photos and showed me a picture of myself and asked who it was. When I told him it was me, he responded by saying "But mommy, the lady in the picture is not fat!" FML
Today, I was playing with my kid cousin outside. It was warm, so I was wearing my new bikini, and felt pretty good about myself. She suddenly turns to me and asks, "How come your tits are so small when you have such a big belly?" FML
Today, I was taking my 3 month-old nephew for a walk in his stroller, when a lady stopped me to coo over him. Then she patted my stomach and said, "Don't worry, you'll lose the baby weight soon." I've never had a baby. FML
Today, as I was just finishing my grocery shopping, a little girl and her mother walked past. Seeing the little girl staring at me, I waved. The girl then pointed to me and asked her mother "Mommy, is that man pregnant?" FML
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Top comments
logankyng 15
Time to follow through with that forgotten new year's resolution
freckleface221 19
Gotta love kids. They always speak their mind.
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Comments (73)
Erery 16
honesty it hurts...
aboelmagd 18
Tell them "I bet you'll fit in there".
superman3212 8
so? she a little kid.. don't be upset
chinchilla417 12
YDI for forgetting your New Year's Resolution to be hitting that treadmill. To the kid I offer a high five.
AlWAYSN4EVR 13
Dawwwe! That's so adorable!
djsammyc 19
I think this is your wakeup call
at0micmin3r 23
58 lbs (and counting) ago, my little niece told me point blank "Uncle, you're really fat." "Not for long..." I muttered under my breath. Kids can be so brutally HONEST.
ManiPaul 6
Madam please put down the fork and very kindly step away from the food. And if that doesn't work then liposuction.
ddlovatolover 23
Hey, in your defense, it's harder to lose weight after giving birth. Keep at it and one day you'll get there!
MightyThoth 7
start jogging.... NOW