mimi
United States
Today, I shat a magnet. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Same thing different taste
wtf
United Kingdom
Today, I shat out a staple. FML
clublulu
United States
Today, I absentmindedly stuck two magnets in my mouth while talking, and accidentally swallowed them. I had to go the emergency room. The nurses at the station laughed at me. They thought it was a joke. They couldn't believe an 18 year old would swallow magnets. FML
Meagan Ortiz
Wardrobe change please
Today, I choked on water so hard that I threw up and shat myself. FML
Anonymous
United States
Today, I gave myself a hernia while farting. FML
Anonymous
Altamonte Springs, United States
Today, in the middle of a presentation, I fought a shart, but the shart won. FML
sadface
This FML is from back in 2010 but it's good stuff
Australia
Ouch
Today, I pulled a hamstring by taking a dump. FML
SenorPoopypants
Today, I shat myself during a job interview. FML
Mel
This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff
United States
Woah!
Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shat myself. FML
brownunderwear
United States
Today, I took a poop that was three states of matter. Solid, liquid, and gas. FML
orourkeda
Dublin, Ireland
Bad day #74746
Today, I sharted in work this morning. It was rather unpleasant and everyone around me knew what had happened. The embarrassment was stifling. FML
Top comments
cBlackout 13
That's when you know you party too hard.
develgool 0
Ok when did you have magnet for dinner?
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Comments (322)
develgool 0
Ok when did you have magnet for dinner?
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
Hmmm I wonder how many licks it takes to get to the center of a magnet *1* *2* *3* *gulp* OMG
YourEvilHero 12
what did I tell you about eating magnets for breakfast young lady!!?
rein 8
there goes your attraction, down the sewage system.
LiyIa_fml 8
This will be a great story to tell your kids of why they shouldn't put things in their mouths!
dsbs 9
120- I hope you don't think this dingus will actually plan on reproducing
alpaquette91 9
What kind of magnet ... Hopefully not a big red one...
drawmesunshine 17
At least he didn't eat two; they may have never come out!
opendoorclosed 8
You have an amazing gift... I trust you will use your magnet-******** powers for good.
trgower13 0
I'm not even mad. I'm impressed.
Aeroxx1337 17
Probably after having a staple for lunch.
False_Stupidity 42
Eating magnets is not the recommended way to add iron to your diet..
judices 0
119- I see what you did there
panvicka 16
Global financial and economic crisis....
jefffluffingham 5
i dont think the OP has metal intestines/is Wolverine. but seriously OP, watch your iron intake.
tacovender 7
I guess you can call op very ATTRACTIVE!!!!!! Lol
YouFailForLife 7
Magnets...how do they work anyways...
Uscdrew1 7
Just be glad it wasn't Steven Magnet!
Xx_Dakota_xX 1
Where's magneto when we need him?
Kyuubi1589 1
******' magnets, how do they work?
tacovender 7
When they're taken out of the ground they still keep little pieces of gravity in them! Now go tell that to your physics instructor and get an A! :D
develgool 0
Turns out magnets are not part of the food purimid. Who knew?
saxophoneguitar 0
Brony!
May525XoXo 8
At op, are you "Iron Man?"
dragonboyjackle 0
Everyone so far has failed to ask the question of exactly how did OP discover his/her bodily waste was magnetic
thatderpyguy1111 2
lol
thatderpyguy1111 2
lol
EdenCrystal 21
The OP must have been trying to add more iron to their diet. A healthy body is more attractive, after all.
PlasmaPorter 12
dem jugglos though... I don't wanna talk to no scientist, y'all mathafuckas just gettin me pissed
BeatlesObsessed 12
How the hell does that manage to happen?
EvilPotato 15
2 when you ingest one.
hellokittay 5
^ No, you're wrong. The magnet was obviously created inside his/her robotic organs. Then proceeded to somehow get in the stomach, and led to the intestine where it was then shat out. It's the only way it got there. Trust me, I'm right :) -sarcasm- I hope you all understood it was being used.
instnt1nfction 17
Your all wrong, OP just had the force with him/her.
instnt1nfction 17
Your all wrong, OP just had the force with him/her.
instnt1nfction 17
Your all wrong, OP just had the force with him/her.
instnt1nfction 17
Your all wrong, OP just had the force with him/her.
Saltime 0
Say that again? I couldn't hear you.
googlefrewdnoob 0
Yeah, and why the helldid he test if it was a magnet
instnt1nfction 17
It's not my fault FML started to glitch
13FTW 9
Don't blame the system, blame the user. FML is the god of all websites, therefore it DOES NOT glitch.
Gorillaz23 9
I like your username 2.
BeatlesObsessed 12
Why thank you, Gorilla sir. (:
rudysayshi 4
what's up gorrilaz you trying to spit some game at my girl I kid :p but I agree her name is awesome
TheLefty 1
That's exactly what I was gonna say!:O
cBlackout 13
That's when you know you party too hard.
StopDropNRoll 11
Seriously! I mean come on. OP( to self (while drunk of course)): "hmm I don't seem to attracting any chicks...god I really need to start talking to some girls. Wait! I got it. Chick magnet! *gulp*. sometime later. How the f*** did this get here" He will never know =
CryMoreFMLs 15
Meth is one HELL of a drug #3
chickenwalrus 14
he must have been partying with the guy who shat a staple
carolv22 0
swag.
BlAcKxJe5uS 6
An inspiring quote from Rick James- "Cocaines a hell of a drug"
cheeturtle 0
232- LOVE that show xD
oops_im_fucked 8
Or op is just REALLY bored... Or hungry.
LuxAeterna_fml 0
I can only think of one answer.
False_Stupidity 42
Don't leave us in suspense like that mate. What is the answer!?
MrUnicorn 3
When I saw this FML I said out loud, "Eeeuugh, what?!"
xdust 4
I had to put this comment here. Can anyone say When They Cry? (look it up it makes sence)
MrUnicorn 3
But your spelling doesn't
friedchkn97 4
meeeeeeeeeerp
kateRAWR 4
How yhe hell do u shit a magnet ?
SkoomaKi 28
^ Very very painfully.
slappymojo 0
what does shat means?
dancer050 0
Pooped
iknowimawesome 13
Wow. Okay then.
zukinihudini 0
Shitted
tweetbaby14 18
It means applesauce.
kj96 0
you ******* dumbass holy shat
rooboy 16
Past tense for shit
vnbritt 0
Pooped out
usmcUSA 0
Boy you got shat for brains!!!!
BlAcKxJe5uS 6
Shit, Which apprently has a higher IQ than you(:
36AngryPandas 1
159- sfgsfgfg
DalekScythe 0
no... no... you are NOT that retarded!!
36AngryPandas 1
159- You look like a slag
Tennispro349 2
I recommend seeking some help young man.
Tennispro349 2
I recommend seeking some help young man.
Tennispro349 2
Go seek some help.
clealove13__ 8
You're such an ass. They were only asking a question.
frances11111 0
Haha made me laugh out loud lmao
michaelscott23 7
Today, I read the shortest FML ever.
Andr913 13
Wrong, I think the one about MJ dying was shorter...
Feklfekl2222 32
There was the "Today I shat out a staple FML" as well
False_Stupidity 42
I wonder if the staple shitter is related to the OP?
c0c0_fml 16
I was thinking the same thing lol
skyttlz 32
I've also read "today, I woke up and it was Monday. Fml" but I think MJ dying was shortest.
cykedelic 1
YDI, what on earth led up to the point for you to need to shit out a magnet anyway. Seems like there were plenty of YDI moments leading up to this particular event as well :/
herpitydurteedur 0
Took me like 20 minutes just to select the fml to read it +_+
rexgar2000 10
I hate that..
th4m4ster 6
just select the one above or below and click the up/down button , would ve taken 2 seconds
noobgang7 5
I see what you did there with that face
c0c0_fml 16
Same here ! I was only able to open it today since it wasn't the first on top anymore.
tomahawkgaming57 0
Lol, me too
ElectricGhost_fml 5
haha me too
False_Stupidity 42
Why are so many people having trouble selecting it? I've got fat fingers and had no trouble selecting it on the app.