Today, I saw my dog sleeping, so I laid next to her and put her arm around my neck to be cute. Only for her to wake up and bite my nose. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML
Today, I woke up to my dog laying on the pillow next to me. When he saw that I was awake, he wagged his tail happily and then promptly sneezed in my face. FML
Today, I hugged my dog and kissed her on the side of the face. She responded by mauling me across my own face. FML
Today, I woke up, patted my dog and kissed his nose. He was dead. FML
Today, as I do every morning, I woke up and gave my dog, who sleeps next to me, a kiss on the nose. Except that this morning he had been sleeping the other way round. I kissed him on the ass. FML
Today, I was woken up by my wife softly kissing me on the lips. Half asleep, I kissed her back, before quickly opening my eyes and realising it wasn't my wife; it was my dog. FML
Today, I was woken up by my dog touching my foot, so I tried to push it away. Then I realized that I'd kicked my girlfriend in the face. FML
Today, I woke up my girlfriend up with a cute kiss. She was apparently having a bad dream and headbutted me. FML
Today, I fell asleep on the couch, only to wake up later with my dog's tongue over my mouth. That was my first ever kiss. FML
Today, I was looking after my parents house and their wiener dog, and fell asleep on the couch. The dog climbed onto my shoulders and rested behind my head like a doggie neck pillow. All was great until she farted right in my left ear. FML
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Top comments
mintcar 10
You put your arm around your dog to be " cute?" Strange reason.
ImaginaryFoe 1
"Let sleeping dogs lie." Never wondered why that's an old adage, huh?
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Comments (80)
mintcar 10
You put your arm around your dog to be " cute?" Strange reason.
Juliaa15 6
I've done it before. My dog freaked out as well. Not biting, but I felt lousy afterwards. -scoff- Especially if it was a big dog, I found this FML cute. Especially since I know I'm not the only one who does this. xD But in all seriousness, I understand why the OP did that. Not their fault. (:
ChibiGirl5 0
she put the dogs arm around her neck
AvengedSevenfold_fml_fml 12
I love cuddling my puppies, it IS cute :D
BAMF18 0
dogs don't have arms.
ConfusionsLoveMe 0
I'm pretty sure they have arms... :P
TheAftermath 0
So...what do they have? All four claws? -_-
Miii_fml 0
fail!
coderedz 0
they don't have arms they have 4 legs, are you going to say the dog's arm has a foot?
kram02 2
i'm pretty sure she meant front legs when she said arms cause if she just wrote "I put my dog's leg around my neck" that would be awkward
jesss_x 0
70 - i understand what you're saying. but it's best not to disturb dogs while they're sleeping. they're most likely to freak out.
sisoladra 20
No if you reread it, it says she put the dog's arm around HER neck.
EatnBeef 7
not an FML
FYLDeep 26
"First!" ...Oh are we not just posting the various things that are guaranteed to be modded?
KrazyKatz3 26
Clearly is. Look at the top of the screen.
FYLDeep 26
She didn't like you noseying around is all.
AdaMCRLover 0
Uhh, dogs don't have arms. Just legs. And ouch. Lol
ImaginaryFoe 1
"Let sleeping dogs lie." Never wondered why that's an old adage, huh?
FYLDeep 26
I've yelled at mine before. Sometimes she'll start yelping and shaking around. If I can't sleep, then she can't sleep either (That's my justification for it at least). I'll admit that it wouldn't be a good idea to get close though. Usually takes a couple seconds for her to realize where the hell she is.
KylesGirl52 0
sounds like you have a mean dog :)
jewels1877 0
In tha face!
ILoveEggnog 7
You never fail to make me giggle inappropriately.
Hidan_fml 0
"THAT'S WHAT YOU GET FOR WAKING ME UP, BITCH!"
gracevet88 0
Ironically or coincidentally, whichever, the dog is female and therefor is a bitch
jess6blondie9 3
If I were the dog, I would have bit you too.