Today, I received my first phone call of the new year. It was the police station informing me that my elderly grandmother has been arrested for indecent exposure. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I went to pay my grandma a visit. She called the cops because she didn't recognize me and thought I was a robber. FML
Today, I got a phone call letting me know my grandmother was arrested for trying to light my grandpa on fire. She's now in jail, asking for bail money. FML
Today, I spent several hours downtown with my violent grandma, after she was arrested for threatening a guy with a gun. His crime? "Trespassing" by ringing the doorbell and asking if she was interested in donating to charity. FML
Today, being the nice grandchild that I am, I went to visit my grandmother. She didn't recognise who I was. I thought she was joking. She later called the police as, "Some weirdo had walked into her house." I'm that weirdo; she wasn't joking. FML
Today, my grandmother drunk dialed me at midnight to wish me a happy new year. I was already in bed. My grandmother has a better social life than I do. FML
Today, my phone rang while I was home alone. When I picked up, all I could hear was heavy breathing. Convinced it was one of my friends playing a joke, I said loudly, "Get off the phone, you fucker, and don't call back!" It turned out it was my grandma. She had been having a stroke. FML
Today, the police turned up. It turns out the girl I slept with two nights ago was burgled. She told my great aunt, who happens to live next door to her. They then told my grandparents, who then told my mum. I'm now a suspect. FML
Today, my grandpa, a married high school teacher, got arrested for having an inappropriate relationship with a female student. Hearing the news, I called my grandma crying. Not only is he most likely going to jail, but in seven months I will have a new aunt who is eighteen years younger than me. FML
Today, some cops came to my house saying that the neighbors thought the party I was having was too loud and obnoxious. It was my grandmother's 86 birthday party. FML
Today, I was on the phone with my senile grandma, when I told her I had to go because I had an appointment at the clinic. For some reason, she assumed I was talking about an abortion clinic, and started raging at me and calling me a murderer. FML
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Top comments
jemmers 13
Go grandma! At least she had fun.
kjcamaro3 5
Come on granny....roll those hooters back up!
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Comments (157)
westcoastsam 3
Omg grandma you rock lol
Chixken 6
Gross mental image :(
beebananaz88 0
Pics or it didn't happen.
SamLiveFree_77 9
C'mon Let Grandma Party! Let her enjoy her last years remaining! Go Grandma! Woo Hoo!!
mynameispickle 0
Eew. Well, it made a memory, right?
ZDK5498 6
that's kind of cute... I like those elderly people that are still crazy AND like to have fun :D
paradiseisland01 0
Happy new year grandma lol
bre_zip_it_up13 11
seem like she's the life of the party while you sitting at home bored as ****
Babbalooey 0
This is an awesome way to start a new year, your granny is awesome.
GoW_Chick 15
Poor meemaw she was just trying to have some fun before the year ended. Can't they give the old broad a break?