PurpleSloth
Tracy, United States
Today, I realized that without my birth control pills, I would have no idea what day it is. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Same thing different taste
Anonymous
Australia
Malpractice
Today, I found out that I have unnecessarily been using birth control for the past 10 years. A surgery I had following a complication with my first child apparently rendered me infertile, and none of the doctors bothered to enlighten me. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I found out that I'm going to be a mother. This was a mystery, since I take birth control and use condoms all the time. Or, at least, it was, until my mother admitted to swapping my pills and poking holes in my condoms so she could have a grandchild before she died. FML
irwingiggles
Netherlands
Today, I figured out how my birth control works. If you're on your period for four months straight you can't have sex, so you won't be pregnant. FML
Anonymous
Manhattan, United States
Too little, too late
Today, I went to the health department to get on some birth control. I left the health department without birth control, and with the news that I'm pregnant. FML
Anonymous
Canada
Today, I found out I was born as a result of someone switching my mom's birth control pills with Tic Tacs. FML
hellolaina
San Francisco, United States
Today, I realized that without fail, even if I'm not supposed to get it, I get my period just in time for vacations. FML
Username
United States
Today, I discovered my boyfriend has been slipping me abortion pills to "supplement" my regular birth control. FML
samantha
United States
Today, I found out that after using several types of birth control, and being paranoid about pregnancy, I've been infertile for years. FML
Anonymous
Yeet it
Today, I found out that even though my girlfriend is on the pill, and even though my girlfriend took emergency contraception, she became pregnant days after the first time we had sex without a condom. FML
Anonymous
India
Safety first
Today, I found out that morning after pills don't work if you're already ovulating. I also found out that I might become a father wayyyy sooner than expected. FML
Top comments
Welshite 40
Buy a calendar.
LiterOfCola 16
Rough and getting off. That's just the way she likes it
Add a comment · Reply to
You must be logged in to be able to post comments!
Comments (112)
LiterOfCola 16
Rough and getting off. That's just the way she likes it
jizzwold 21
Bow chika bow wow
Welshite 40
Buy a calendar.
HowieDoIt 21
Or sing the Happy Days theme song
ColdplaySucks 18
A phone is good too.
kevsandy303 12
20- But then she'll think there's a day call "happyday" frequently in the week
EvilUndead 9
Most likely she already has a cellphone, which comes with calendar included.
XDsmileyDX_fml 24
You should pay more attention then.
Webslinger66 10
OP thinks its Wednesday. But it's Friday.....
rastamon2 6
#76 - Ya know, when you try to be funny, it's usually never funny.
Webslinger66 10
I'm glad you pay so much attention to me. Leave me alone bob marley....
adams7955 2
sounds like you are to dumb and dont need to be raising a baby so dont ever get off the pill dumb dumb
Docbee 11
Use your friends, other people always know what day it is.
onorexveritas 24
and you'll be sterile too
sens3sfailing 25
but, you.....wait...what?
misspennycakes 7
Haha what that makes no sense?
Sputnikspak 13
10: Are you really implying that the pill makes you sterile? That is seriously one of the dumbest things I have heard for ages. There is no evidence that birth control pills make you sterile. Women sometimes even conceive ON the pills (if they forget one). Even the pills they had 30 years ago didn't make you sterile. My mother was on them before I was born. Just... Seriously?
Ameel_fml 19
It's ridiculous beliefs like this that continues the stigma many people have against female birth control. :(
shibbysgirl 4
I conceived my (planned) baby a month after i stopped taking the pill so, yeah, Im sterile......wtf, do some people seriously believe it makes you sterile!?
rocker_chick23 27
My eldest son is 7 and was conceived on the pill and condoms. I am pregnant wit twins and guess what? They are BC and Plan B babies. Yeah, I am not sterile.
perdix 31
Well, if you don't have your pills, it's not Sex Day. That's probably all the calendar you need ;)
Pleonasm 36
I only have to remember two days: - Wake up early day -Sleep til 11am day.
Docbee 11
The other days are nice because other people will remind you so you don't have to remember!(Birthdays, holidays, illegal children gladiator survivor days, and pancake day!)
sens3sfailing 25
heeeeey....your making up pancake day arent you?
perdix 31
#44, no, it's a big holiday in Boston.
dashizam 10
IHop gave out free pancakes.
DontClickOnMe 28
Yup, February 5th is National Pancake Day. =) Mmm, pancakes.
Apple_2404 11
Pancake day isn't necessarily on the 5th of February - that's just when it happened to fall this year. Pancake day is Shrove Tuesday, the day before Ash Wednesday at the beginning of Lent. The Catholic season leading up to Easter. So pankcake day will fall on a Tuesday a month before Easter every year. Not the 5th of February.
Apple_2404 11
It is a big holiday in Boston because there's a large Catholic Community in Boston and Pancake Day is Shrove Tuesday- a celebration in the season leading up to Easter.
DutchBasterd 15
58. thumbs up for making my birthday a pancake day :)
DontClickOnMe 28
65 - Huh, I had no idea. Thank you for letting me know, though. You learn something new every day. =)
perdix 31
#66, you need to look up Boston Pancake in the Urban Dictionary (no one else needs to.) You are over-thinking my joke.
DutchBasterd 15
Nop, Sorry :)
kaycol 8
You wouldn't be part of the jersey shore cast?