Today, I realized that I'm so depressed that I can't even watch porn without getting upset about how I can't get laid. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I realized that due to my anti-depressants, I can no longer orgasm. At. All. Which depresses me more. FML
Today, I got bored looking at porn. FML
Today, I had a wet dream. The problem was that I was dreaming about watching porn. I can't even get laid in my dreams. FML
Today, I realized that I'm so lonely I can no longer whack off without bursting into tears and crying like a little bitch. FML
Today, I realized I have been single for far too long when I was turning off porno after porno because I couldn't stand the horrible acting. FML
Today, I stopped watching porn at 6 a.m. to Google if depression makes you not able to cum. I was masturbating because I can't sleep. Insomnia is also a sign of depression. There's no joy at night anymore. FML
Today, I realized how bad my depression has gotten when I caught myself fantasizing about suicide while having sex with my husband. FML
Today, since splitting up with my girlfriend, I’ve watched so much porn I think I’ve given myself a friction burn on my clit, so now not only does it hurt to even walk normally, it’s way too painful to masturbate, so I’m now horny all the frigging time. FML
Today, I would rather pound to porn than have sex with my wife, because trying to get her in the mood is too much hassle. FML
Today, I was watching porn, and ended up bawling because the girl in the video looked like my ex. FML
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Top comments
Schizomaniac 24
Yeah, I always make girls pass a literacy test before I sleep with them. "I'm gonna rock your world after you identify the adverbs and correctly place commas in this sentence."
igive 29
Go to a bar, roofie up some drinks. If that doesn't work, prison is full of willing people.
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Comments (106)
zandalee 20
Make this the year to get out and get into a proper relationship. Go out there and meet someone!
oz_jared 3
Pay for a root than
Beeftinkle 13
What
Free4ever 6
get off the computer, work on your social skills. problems solved.
theboy13 13
Mailorderbrides.com should b able to assist u lol
davie94 18
Email me :)
Mister_Triangle 21
[email protected]?
igive 29
This isn't eHarmony. Or craigslist.
jellyghost 12
A good way to get laid is to not try to get laid.
StzaCrack666 18
switch from a **** site.to a dating site
Ukeee_X 19
Dude, with enough lube and a warm hand (or device) you'll be ok. You're obviously doing it too much or wrong.
spitonmydick 4
There's more important things in this world than getting laid fool.
Satoaoi 13
oh damn