Today, I realized I'm missing my diamond earrings. After ripping apart the vacuum bag and exhausting all other options I'm pretty sure my new cat ate them. I'm going to go sift through several days worth of cat shit now. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, my dog somehow managed to swallow a ring that my mother had bought me. Now I must carefully poke and search through each pile of dog crap I find in my yard for the next week. FML
Today, I decided to clean my entire apartment. While vacuuming, I sucked up something big. I didn’t realize what it was until later when I couldn’t find my engagement ring. I digged through a vacuum bag full of dust, crumbs, and mystery hair, only to realize it was on my finger the whole time. FML
Today, I found my lost iPhone earbuds. In the cat litter box. I am 100% sure that they passed through my cat to get there. FML
Today, I awoke to my cat with micro pellets all over him. He'd destroyed a pillow containing them, and now there are thousands of these pellets throughout the entire house. My vacuum is broken. FML
Today, while doing some spring cleaning, I found the remains of my goldfish, which I was sure my cat ate last year. FML
Today, I found out that my cat has been secretly stealing my socks and hiding them under the couch, when I found a pile of 15 socks after I finally moved my furniture to vacuum the floor underneath. FML
Today, my cat used my head as a springboard and ripped my earring out with her claw. FML
Today, I came home to find that my sweet kitten had gotten out and dragged a bird inside, where he ripped it to shreds. I found the bird's head in my underwear drawer. FML
Today, my cat vomited violently. I can smell it but I can't find it. FML
Today, in the process of leaning over the sink to close the drain so my diamond earrings wouldn't fall in as I put them on, I dropped my diamond earring down the drain. FML
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Top comments
redbluegreen 41
'A diamond in the rough' doesn't even begin to cover this. And all those scene songs about diamonds and pussy now have context, don't they?
QTp13 10
Why would a cat eat diamond earrings?? That does not make any sense, unless of course you starved and depraved your cat of food and water, and he thought to take vengeance :D I dont know I could be wrong
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Comments (88)
Sociopath 0
wow... That sucks. Wear a face mask and gloves.
Thoko_fml 0
reminds me of when I found my mom's diamond from her ring on the ground.
kthxbai123 1
good luck with that!:D
Gilliam999 0
or kill it and sift through intestines
EpicFail1520 16
I'm not a cat person.
TRKade 15
Sounds like diary entry
bleedingglitter 24
I would understand if you have a dog but I've never seen a cat interested in eating anything metal. Certainly not a fully grown, well fed cat at least. My cat won't even eat people food let alone random jewelry.
marthamydear23 9
this makes no sense. why would your cat eat them? and why wouldn't you put diamond earrings away???