Today, I realised why my room has been smelling like berries and why sex has been so uncomfortable recently. Apparently boyfriend doesn't know the difference between hair conditioner and lube. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I thought my boyfriend was being sweet by stroking my hair, only to discover he was getting rid of a booger. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like vegetables. FML
Today, I had to inform my roommate that dry shampoo, deodorant, and perfume are not the same as a shower. It's been two weeks. FML
Today, my new boyfriend was at my flat for the first time. He picked up something in the bathroom and said 'What the hell's this?'. I told him what it was for, and he said 'You girls and your weird female products. Who needs all this stuff?'. It wasn't a female thing. It was shampoo. FML
Today, I tried to gently tell my boyfriend that he needs to wash his clothes more often as some of them smell pretty musty. He got all pissy (no pun intended) and assured me that none of his exes ever complained about a smell. I can’t even go down on the guy because his crotch smells bad. FML
Today, I noticed that my very expensive facial cleanser was almost out. I had moved in with my boyfriend recently, and questioned him, telling him "You don't have to use so much to wash your face. That's a $70 bottle." To which he responded, "Oh, that nice-smelling stuff? Yeah, I use that on my junk." FML
Today, after recently breaking up with my boyfriend, I unknowingly washed my laundry using his washing tabs. My whole wardrobe now smells like my ex. FML
Today, I realized that my flatmate showers so little that the furniture she uses smells like BO. FML
Today, my loving fiancé informed me that my new perfume makes me smell like a urinal cake. FML
Today, my boyfriend told me I smell like his grandma's house. FML
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Top comments
BurnInDemonFire 39
"What? They're both liquids, and this one smells nicer. I was thinking about using maple syrup, too, so you'd end up smelling like pancakes."
RichardPencil 32
On the plus side, your bush has never been so shiny and manageable!
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Comments (13)
BurnInDemonFire 39
"What? They're both liquids, and this one smells nicer. I was thinking about using maple syrup, too, so you'd end up smelling like pancakes."
articwolf2 17
Gave me a bad image of pancake flaps...
Gamessence 19
blue waffle
Abby Gut 25
How would you not notice sooner? Ouch!!
RichardPencil 32
On the plus side, your bush has never been so shiny and manageable!
sourgirl101 29
Great, now I have that Marcy Playground song stuck in my head. Your Bf probably used it in the shower and it worked for him? He needs a quick tutorial with the difference between innies and outies. And next time maybe spring for the lube yourself. I learnt that lesson when I once got Blistex lip balm rubbed on me. Wonder if they have disco lemonade flavoured lube?
RichardPencil 32
I smell sex and Pantene hair? I love that song!
blahblabbity 19
there’s a difference?? i’ve been putting lube in my hair for years!!!
Chazzster 32
Can boyfriend read?
LolCandy 27
Looks like he doesn’t care about your health at all. Wouldn’t be shocked if you developed a case of BV or yeast infection from that- scented stuff is awful for your vag even on the outside/ vulva.
interesting33 37
he probably doesn't realise there is a difference or that it could be harmful .I'm pretty sure my bf would have no clue it could have negative effects.
BadKitty13 28
ouch