Today, I had to inform my roommate that dry shampoo, deodorant, and perfume are not the same as a shower. It's been two weeks. FML
Collection
Fall
Dead leaves, the first cold of the season and an umbrella flipped inside out: fall, the season of grace.
Today, I found out the crappy shampoo I've been borrowing from my girlfriend is actually "feminine wash." FML
Today, I realized that my flatmate showers so little that the furniture she uses smells like BO. FML
Today, despite using deodorant religiously and showering twice a day, my roommate still smells so bad that every time she enters the room I become physically sick. FML
Today, I taught my 12-year-old brothers that showering cannot be used as a substitute for deodorant, and that they should use both. One of them was almost in tears. FML
Today, like every day she works, my roommate once again put on a ton on perfume before work because she doesn't shower. She's gone, but this smell will be here for hours. FML
Today, I discovered that I bought two shampoos instead of a shampoo and conditioner. So for the past three months, I’ve been washing my hair twice. FML
Today, I was getting ready for work and I sprayed my hair to stay in place, then went to spray deodorant under my arm, but noticed that it was super sticky. No wonder my hair spray smelled like baby powder, I'd confused one product with another. FML
Today, I realised why my room has been smelling like berries and why sex has been so uncomfortable recently. Apparently boyfriend doesn't know the difference between hair conditioner and lube. FML
Today, I had to tell my 30 year-old boyfriend to take a shower, or else he won't for a week. FML
Today, while showering, I broke the cap off the shampoo. Not my shampoo, my roommate's. The $60 shampoo I swore I wouldn't touch. FML
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Top comments
yeyeboys 20
I would try to talk to her in the nicest way possible. You don't want to offend her and start a fight between you two considering you live with her.
WCARlover 35
I don't see how people live like that. It just feels so gross not to shower; I hate the way my hair feels especially. Not even trying to be rude, I just genuinely don't understand how people can stand the feeling of not being clean and willingly do it
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Comments (85)
RageWolf16 31
Ew
ethan043 18
Waste of a first comment...
orbit 22
Dammit #2 it was your job to make up for it
yeyeboys 20
I would try to talk to her in the nicest way possible. You don't want to offend her and start a fight between you two considering you live with her.
mif_fml 27
Or subtly hint at it, like nominating her to do the ice bucket challenge. Then when she is wet, say "you might as well take a shower."
onealmxwilson 18
So for some reason I read this as "in the incest way" and I was like ???
littleteapot 21
OP's roommate might say, "But that was my shower."
annie917 15
#31 I did the same thing and had to read it again
urdirtyolduncle 15
Poor hygiene is the worst
simplysarcastics 26
Shoot at least you get dry shampoo and cover ups, I got nothing from my roommate, I just had to grin and bare it...
Epikatz 22
^^^ The implications of the homophone in this comment are wonderful.
Cruzg2017 18
Is he in middle school?
ChristianH39 30
OP said perfume so I'm gonna guess it's a she.
addictedtoIASIP 14
Plus it's her roommate, they must be a lot older than middle school
Nilorak 24
I know guys that wear perfume.
meepmerp 20
And I know perfume that wear guys...
Nilorak 24
Sorry, english is not my native language.
MisterEx 28
Girls/women wear perfume. Guys/men wear cologne. *virtual nohomo high five from one non native englizian to another*
meepmerp 20
Your English was fine, I was just being stupid :P
Si123 33
#78 in the UK we don't say cologne we say perfume, for guys also
AoC15 10
Or girls that spray perfume on guys
Leanne798 25
I'm guessing this roommate is the same as the guy from the last FML? In all seriousness though, you didn't think to tell your roommate like, a week ago?
lnheritance 19
As long as she's not using snot to keep her hair back, or to control friz you have no problem.
simplysarcastics 26
You cannot make someone bathe, I've witnessed people tell others they stink, and it did not work. So we can talk all day but I can't make you wash your ass or brush your teeth. Remember Ben from that's so raven, ray resulted to bathing him herself, he would not get the picture.
kingdomgirl94 29
Uhm if you recall, once she told him he smells bad, he agreed to bathe more. He didn't even know and thought his mom was just being a nag because she said his dad stank too.
thatsawkward7 18
Maybe time to have an intervention :/
Just_A_Tree 20
Are you telling me that I've been showering wrong this entire time?
Cheezits4dayz 14
Has anybody else noticed?
WCARlover 35
I don't see how people live like that. It just feels so gross not to shower; I hate the way my hair feels especially. Not even trying to be rude, I just genuinely don't understand how people can stand the feeling of not being clean and willingly do it
ChristianH39 30
I don't get it either, especially since I work at a machine shop so I end up covered in coolant oil every day. I shudder to think what that would feel like after two weeks
shay_serendipity 29
Even if I missed just one day of taking a shower I feel unclean. I take a shower almost everyday, washing my hair every other day. I don't think I would be comfortable with not showering for any longer than one day.
Ltsdragons 19
Their hair must be pretty... Soapy.. But hopefully your roommate decides to shower soon
finalyearsofhate 22
Dry shampoo is typically a powder or spray, it's not soapy.
michaelm1290 23
Suggest a slip and slide in the backyard with soap and a hose
Ashfal 8
Agreed. Add alcohol. Make it a party. Adults still enjoy the slip n slide! :)
TanzWolf 26
That's really unsanitary. And she's a girl? I mean personal choice and all but I have to shower every other day or else I feel uncomfortable.
sarahmaxine 19
Every other day? That is so gross. Shower everyday
TanzWolf 26
Showering everyday is actually bad for your skin, and especially your hair. Even more so if you use products every time.
LittleBells 17
I also feel uncomfortable when I don't shower every other day. My 13 year old brother on the other hand...
ohishkabibble 21
Yeah, I don't think so, #26. Or have you not heard of "dry skin"? Unless you have unreasonably greasy hair, horrendous B.O., or get filthy at work every day, there's really no reason to shower every day. Every other day, or even third day (depending on the person), is perfectly reasonable.