Today, I posted a Facebook status on how I hated the new Batman movie. I'm now single, and have received multiple threats. FML
Collection
Halloween
A failed costume, stolen candy and a very real scare: Halloween, the one night when fear is allowed.
Today, I changed my relationship status on Facebook from "in a relationship" to "single." I forgot to take my phone to work, and when I got back, I saw someone had replied, "What happened?" Someone else commented, "He broke his hand." My ex and a bunch of other "friends" liked it. FML
Today, I checked my Facebook notifications to see that someone likes my new single status. My ex. FML
Today, I complained about being bored to death on Facebook. Someone took it as a suicide threat and called the police. They showed up at my apartment and my workplace. FML
Today, my girlfriend threatened to break up with me because I don't like her Facebook statuses enough. FML
Today, I had a horrible breakup with my girlfriend of two years. Depressed, I changed my Facebook status to, "Hate me today, hate me tomorrow, hate me for all the things I didn't do for you." My ex commented, "Give me an orgasm?" Five of my friends, including my mom, liked this. FML
Today, I've been getting terrifying threats all day. Why? I broke up with my girlfriend and turned her in to the police after she and her friends shared their plan to firebomb a church during Sunday school. I didn't know I was dating a terrorist. I might need a new identity. FML
Today, the man who tried to mug me sent me a friend request on Facebook. FML
Today, I posted on Facebook that I got the Princess Peach Happy Meal toy and I was super ecstatic. A friend of mine commented, “This shit is why you’re 32 and still single as fuck. Get a boyfriend and go start a family.” Her comment got 38 likes. I threw my laptop across the room and burst into tears. FML
Today, after months of being pestered to do so, I finally read the first Harry Potter book. I hated it. Upon hearing this, my girlfriend posted the fact on Facebook, where I immediately received tons of abuse and eventual shunning by my friends, family, and coworkers. My girlfriend just laughed. FML
Today, my wife changed her Facebook status from "Married" to "Widowed". I'm scared. FML
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Top comments
legitkitty 11
Well, what did you expect? Batman is awesome!
dressedskeleton 10
Everyone's entitled to their own opinions- just not that opinion!
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Comments (411)
fmirza95 4
Served you right. Hating a masterpiece like Chris Nolan's Batman is almost as bad as being the psychotic Aurora shooter. Ydi, OP
gracehi 33
You really compared OP to James Holmes? Go **** yourself. That's low even for a troll. And yes, it's still too soon to joke about the Aurora shooting.
eggmarie 25
20: ...what are you rambling on about? I'm confused as to who mentioned Aurora?
I_lost_the_game 25
Me thinks there was a comment before that is deleted now, but was there before.
masterof8849 5
ive never seen it and dont plan on seeing it so its ok :)
s0m3guy2010 21
I bet all of your threats would be awesome to read in Christian Bale's Batman voice. However, you wouldn't know what any of them were saying then.
Bman54 19
I didn't hate it, but I did find it to be the worst of the three Nolan Batman movies.
zandalee 20
I loved it.
bladedrose 3
Agreed completely, it was decent but nothing compared to the first two
Ilikeurfmls 13
*threatens you in a comical manner*
downtime 13
*insert sarcastic retort here*
murphy22 6
*insert lame insult about your sexuality and banging your mom*
valleyshooter 8
Comment moderated for rule-breaking.
I thumbed everyone down who posted any negative comments about Batman, and anyone who supported the OP. Why? Because I was the troll they deserved. Not the troll that they needed. I am the watcher, the one who lurks in the shadows underneath a bridge and eats billy goats. I am the troll.
Rhondaplp 11
jokes on you troll - goats are a greasy meat which leaves your stomach bloated.. mwahahahahhaa
cheesecake_36 6
How do you hate on Batman?
bladedrose 3
Because when It comes to rich normal human super Hero's he's easily the lamest, he uses his billions to make lame gadgets and buy a rubber suit, he talks like he gargles nails. Where's super Hero's like tony stark build a bad ass tec suit and actually accomplish something at the end of the day ^.^
blue_seduction 6
And this is why we keep some things to our selves.
Mekeritrig 15
Talk about Fandumb. Who are the morons telling the OP he deserved it?
gracehi 33
See comment 24.
deadxwedding84 5
YDI for having no taste.